A Guide For Fathers: When A Baby Dies [Paperback]

Tim Nelson (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: November 30, 2004

This pocket sized book is for men who experience the death of their infant child -- whether it be miscarriage, stillbirth or early infant death. Meant to be a guide during the early hours and days after finding out the news of their baby's death, the book offers suggestions for communicating with medical caregivers, offering support to their partner, telling the news to other children, making funeral arrangements and taking care of themselves in a time of crisis. It goes on to talk about effective communications during the weeks and months following the loss, going to a support group, returning to the workplace, and the issues surrounding a subsequent pregnancy.

Editorial Reviews

Review

I bought your [book] after our twins died over a year ago. Out of everything we read, my husband felt that your words were the ones that most spoke to him. Thank you for putting out something- small, simple, and meaningful- for dads who are not only dealing with the feelings of their wives, but also suffer their own, unique grief. --fathersgrievinginfantloss.blogspot.com

The support and assistance that you offer to other parents touches people every day in ways you cannot possibly know. We have been providing a copy of A Guide for Fathers to our families for several years, and it has been such a gift to both women and men. Men that attend our support group meetings often quote from it. They say that if the dads read only one thing, that should be it. --Perinatal Loss Clinician, Atlanta, GA

From the Author

The suggestions found in this booklet are based not only on my personal experience following the stillbirth of my daughter, Kathleen, but include issues other dad's have shared with me as I've spoken at support groups and conferences around the United States. While each father will process their grief in their unique way, this book is meant to be a guide to refer to as they make their grief journey.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 68 pages
• Publisher: Tim Nelson; Revised 2007 edition (November 30, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0965084841
• ISBN-13: 978-0965084840
• Product Dimensions: 5.6 x 3.8 x 0.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.6 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #61,992 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #11 in Books > 4-for-3 Books > Health, Mind & Body > Personal Health > Women's Health > Pregnancy & Childbirth

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

10 of 10 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Recommended For Men Experiencing Grief Of Their Baby, January 3, 2007

By 

Jewel Sample, award-winning author of Flying ... (OK) - See all my reviews

This review is from: A Guide For Fathers: When A Baby Dies (Paperback)

Nelson simply explains from a father's perspective, what a man and a Dad encounters as he goes through the steps of caring for his family and experiencing the devastating loss of his baby. Some of the books topics are how to explain death to children, making arrangements, going back to work, guilt and blame, anger, getting support outside of your family, communication, future pregnancies and going on in life. One topic I found important is the one on anger. Nelson addresses the issues surrounding anger and the importance of being patient with oneself. It is an easy read for busy fathers.

8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Helping to understand what is normal, October 15, 2007

By 

W. Hecht "Q&AGuy" (CA) - See all my reviews
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Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: A Guide For Fathers: When A Baby Dies (Paperback)

It's hard to know what is normal in abnormal situations. The death of a child is (if all goes well) a very abnormal situation for which few people are prepared. And while this guide does not do the impossible (help you and your spouse quickly get over the grief) it does let you know a few important things. First, most of what you are feeling is normal, so just go with it and don't worry about what anyone else thinks. Second, you can't solve your spouse's grief so your best bet is to be supportive and watch out for things you might do that will make things worse (things that you may think are actually helpful).

This book does not attempt to explain the psychological underpinnings of what we do in stressful times; that's not its purprose. It merely offers perspective on what the author and his wife experienced, some of the mistakes he made, and offers proof that life does go on, though certainly it will not go on as it did before.

Because it clearly was not written to climb the bestsellers lists you will not find diagrams, catchy buzzwords or any Mars and Venus stories. This is just one guys story that he hopes will help others- and after reading it, I can say it will do that.

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Great book for bereaved dads!, May 29, 2006

By 

S. M. M. "Miles mom" (san diego, CA USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: A Guide For Fathers: When A Baby Dies (Paperback)

I bought this for hubby after we lost our son. He got a lot out of it. It helped him with his feelings and also helped him deal with me and my feelings. Its an easy simple read that says a lot in a short format. I highly suggest this to bereaved fathers.