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Half in Love: Surviving the Legacy of Suicide [Hardcover]

Linda Gray Sexton
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)

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Book Description

January 1, 2011
After the agony of witnessing her mother’s multiple—and ultimately successful—suicide attempts, Linda Gray Sexton, daughter of the acclaimed poet Anne Sexton, struggles with an engulfing undertow of depression. Here, with powerful, unsparing prose, Sexton conveys her urgent need to escape the legacy of suicide that consumed her family—a topic rarely explored, even today, in such poignant depth.

Linda Gray Sexton tries multiple times to kill herself—even though as a daughter, sister, wife, and most importantly, a mother, she knows the pain her act would cause. But unlike her mother’s story, Linda’s is ultimately one of triumph. Through the help of family, therapy, and medicine, she confronts deep-seated issues and curbs the haunting cycle of suicide she once seemed destined to inherit.

Frequently Bought Together

Half in Love: Surviving the Legacy of Suicide + Searching for Mercy Street: My Journey Back to My Mother, Anne Sexton + Anne Sexton: A Biography
Price for all three: $50.43

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Editorial Reviews

From Booklist

“Half in love with easeful death” is how poet John Keats described his dreamy sense that death would be a welcome release. Linda Gray Sexton, daughter of Anne Sexton, should have been immunized against suicide by the pain of losing her mother, who took her own life at the height of her fame as one of the prime movers in the confessional poetry movement. But in midlife, as her own writing career seemed stalled and her marriage more distant than satisfying, Sexton found herself hounded by the same demons that had destroyed her mother. She writes of three suicide attempts in grim and detailed prose, but at the end she describes a newly settled and happier life with the demons held at bay. The rather rushed ending feels less settled than Sexton probably intended, but overall this is a welcome personal look at the specter that haunts many families, in which a parent’s suicide can threaten the mental health of descendants. --Patricia Monaghan

Review

Praise for Half in Love

"A clear and in-depth portrait of what it is like to attempt to take one’s own life and the ghastly legacy such an action leaves the bereaved family. For anyone who wishes to understand what drives a person to kill himself or herself, Half in Love brings a deeper understanding of the illness than anything short of feeling the urge to commit suicide oneself." —American Psychological Association Review of Books

"A welcome personal look at the specter that haunts many families, in which a parent’s suicide can threaten the mental health of descendants." —Booklist

“In a country where someone commits suicide every seventeen minutes, where bipolar disorder is rampant and poorly understood, Linda Sexton’s beautiful book is a cry for health and sanity. It will bring hope and understanding because it explains the way suicide blights families from generation to generation.” —Erica Jong, author of Fear of Flying

“In her new memoir, Linda Sexton completes the circle opened up with her stunning memoir, Searching for Mercy Street—but this time, the woman whose torment she explores is not her mother, but herself, and where her mother’s story ended with despair, hers is one of survival. With brutal honesty and total lack of self-pity or sentimentality, Linda Sexton has dared to explore a subject more taboo than almost any other: not only suicide, but what comes after, for its survivors. This is a book that will speak to anyone touched by the suicide of someone we knew or loved—as so many of us have been.” —Joyce Maynard, author of At Home in the World and To Die For

Half in Love is a gripping account of the legacy left by a mother’s suicide and an eloquent testament to a daughter’s struggle to wrench herself free of the damage left in the wake of turmoil. Linda Sexton’s determination to forge an identity independent of suicide and destruction is powerful; her book is a vivid and inspiring story of living through despair and coming out the stronger for it.” —Kay Redfield Jamison, author of An Unquiet Mind, and Professor of Psychiatry, John Hopkins School of Medicine

“Linda Sexton is one hell of a brave writer. In her memoir, she takes us on a harrowing journey, to the edge of death and then beyond, to a new, safe place. She’s now able to tell her story about the entanglement with her mother’s legacy—‘half in love with easeful death.’ It’s a story that will reach deep into many readers’ hearts. She makes the telling of this tale an act of grace, of art, of redemption.” —Ellen Sussman, author of On a Night Like This and the upcoming French Lessons

“This is an exquisitely crafted story that needs to be told: how depression and suicide can be passed down through the generations. The most loving, committed mother can suffer such intense pain that all reason is blacked out and death seems the only answer. Linda Sexton is unsparing in her honesty and unfailing in her eloquence as she takes us from the descent to hell to the miracle of recovery. After a siege of courting death, she comes to fall wholly in love with life.” —Sara Davidson, author of Leap! and Loose Change

“Once again, Sexton has pulled off something truly remarkable—in prose that is both graceful and raw she crafts powerful scenes that vibrate with authenticity. I cannot recall a more riveting description of a nearly lethal suicide attempt. The suspense leaps off the pages, pages which the reader is now turning furiously. Also powerful is her deep understanding of how suicide permanently impacts the family through multiple generations and her descriptions of self-stigmatization, which, by the way, belong in mental health curricula.” —Dr. Frederick K. Goodwin, MD, Professor of Psychiatry, George Washington University, Former Director of the National Institute of Mental Health

Half in Love is a testament to the potentially mortal wounds that suicide inflicts upon the living. Linda Gray Sexton has transformed her emotional suffering into a memoir of stunning intimacy. Wise, insightful, and unflinchingly honest, Sexton mines the depths of the darkest despair and ultimately her own salvation. This is a masterful work, beautifully written, by a brave soul of remarkable talent.” —James Brown, author of The Los Angeles Diaries and This River

Praise for Searching for Mercy Street

“Powerful and affecting . . . a candid, often painful, depiction of a daughter’s struggles to come to terms with her powerful and emotionally troubled mother. Sexton writes with compelling urgency and candor and has not tried to gloss over the difficulties of their relationship or resolve the ambivalence of her own emotions. Rather, she has set all these conflicts down on paper, leaving us with a disturbing portrait or a mercurial, impossible, and magnetic woman.” —Michiko Kakutani, The New York Times

“A courageous journey into the dark terrain of remembering, forgiving and healing through telling—a trait that is her birthright.” —People

“One never doubts that Linda Gray Sexton has told us the truth . . . Her writing is at its best: lean, quick, tightly conceived . . . The book almost reeks of authenticity. Searching for Mercy Street is never less than fascinating.” —The New York Times Book Review

“This memoir has an urgency about it and it is to Sexton’s credit as an honest and largely unself-serving narrator that throughout she has chosen to forgo the primitive gratification of scrawling over the picture of her childish mother-worship with fat black crayon; instead she continues to add strokes of color and lightness to an ever-darkening portrait. By the book’s end she has made her way valiantly back to her mother, passing through the portals of rage and despair before she glimpses the possibility of separating out Anne Sexton’s perverse influence from her legacy of delight in words and experience . . . Searching for Mercy Street is suffused with a complicated kind of love.” —Daphne Merkin, The New Yorker

“In this spectacular story of a glamorous, talented and beautiful family veering toward disaster, Linda Sexton has broken the code of silence which often surrounds the American home. In her powerful and graceful prose, honed in four novels of her own, she has quietly and lovingly told the story of her mother and the family she loved both too much and too little. Any mother or daughter, any child of an alcoholic parent, anyone who has lived with the all-consuming obsession of a writer with their work, will recognize themselves in this ravishing portrait.” —Susan Cheever

“In this deft, beautiful memoir, Sexton covers difficult family territory with unique grace.” —New York Daily News

“Sexton has written about intense personal conflicts, evoked strong emotion, and stayed true to it. The saga of this daughter and her mother is inherently fascinating.” —Chicago Tribune

“One of the most illuminating things here is that careful, industrious Linda—who, as she grows older, bravely fights off her own depressions, headaches, even suicidal thoughts, idolizing ‘normalcy’, health, and domestic responsibility—seems a far better writer than her mom.” —Carolyn See, The Washington Post Book World

“Linda Gray Sexton’s exploration is so smart, so well-written, moving, and generous that it transcends the typecasting that could easily have become a trap . . . Written with grace, precision and, most important, love.” —Los Angeles Times Book Review

“Heroic.” —New York Newsday

“This cathartic and anguish-filled book spares no details of the mother’s selfish and difficult personality or her intense and fortifying love.” —Library Journal

“In deceptively fluid prose, Linda explores her complex relationship to her mother and strips raw the nerves of a troubled family.” —Kirkus (starred review)

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 336 pages
  • Publisher: Counterpoint; First Edition edition (January 1, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1582437181
  • ISBN-13: 978-1582437187
  • Product Dimensions: 9.2 x 6.4 x 1.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #338,788 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Linda Gray Sexton was born in Newton, Massachusetts in 1953 and graduated from Harvard University in 1975. She is the daughter of the Pulitzer Prize winning poet, Anne Sexton, and has edited several books of her mother's poetry and a book of her mother's letters, as well as writing a memoir about her life with her mother, "Searching for Mercy Street: My Journey Back To My Mother, Anne Sexton." "Rituals," "Mirror Images," "Points of Light," and "Private Acts" are her four published and widely read novels. "Points of Light" was made into a Hallmark Hall of Fame Special for television.

"Searching for Mercy Street" was named a New York Times Book Review Notable Book and reviewed to overwhelming critical acclaim. In the New York Times, Michiko Kakutani described the book this way: "Powerful and affecting...a candid, often painful, depiction of a daughter's struggles to come to terms with her powerful and emotionally troubled mother. Sexton writes with compelling urgency and candor...a disturbing portrait of a mercurial, impossible and magnetic woman."

Sexton's most recent memoir, "Half in Love: Surviving the Legacy of Suicide" (Counterpoint Press January 11, 2011) is about her struggle with her own mental illness and the legacy of suicide left to her by her mother, who killed herself when Sexton was twenty-one. Through the help of family, therapy and medicine, Sexton confronted deep-seated issues, outlived her mother and curbed the haunting cycle of suicide she once seemed destined to inherit. The book is a story of triumph.

In pre-publication praise, Erica Jong, author of "Fear of Flying" and "Seducing the Demon," says, "In a country where someone commits suicide every seventeen minutes, where bipolar disorder is rampant and poorly understood, Linda Sexton's beautiful book is a cry for health and sanity. It will bring hope and understanding because it explains the way suicide blights families from generation to generation." Joyce Maynard, author of "Labor Day" and "At Home in the World," writes: "In her new memoir, Linda Sexton completes the full circle opened up with her stunning memoir, "Searching for Mercy Street"--but this time, the woman whose torment she explores is not her mother, but herself, and where her mother's story ended with despair, hers is one of survival. With brutal honesty and total lack of self-pity or sentimentality, Linda Sexton has dared to explore a subject more taboo than almost any other: not only suicide, but what comes after, for survivors. This is a book that will speak to anyone touched by the suicide of someone we knew or loved--as so many of us have been."

All her books are available on Amazon.com in either new or used editions. She lives in California with her husband and her two sons.

Please visit www.lindagraysexton.com to learn more about Linda and her books, connect with other readers, and join the conversation about the issues present in her work.

Customer Reviews

Linda is a great writer and a gutsy lady. Amira  |  7 reviewers made a similar statement
Even though this is a memoir, Half in Love often reads like poetry. L. Fannon  |  4 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
15 of 16 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Haunted Life January 8, 2011
Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase
Having a poet-genius for a parent would be difficult for many children. Having an abusive, self-centered parent would be destructive for most children. Having Anne Sexton as your mother would be the worst of both worlds for Linda Gray Sexton.

"Half In Love" is the conclusion of a trilogy of works about the Sexton Family. Starting with Diana Middlebrook's biography of Anne Sexton in 1991, Linda Gray Sexton attempted to understand herself by cooperating with the writer of her mother's life. Then she published her own memoir of life with her alcoholic and mentally-ill mother in 1994 ("Searching For Mercy Street"), twenty years after her mother's suicide. Now, in 2010, she has written a second memoir, "Half In Love," about the culminative effects upon her adult life from her twenty-one years with Ann Sexton as her mother.

Linda Gray Sexton writes of her own life-and-death struggles with suicidal depression, of the loss of family and friends who were exhausted dealing with her pain and of her own survival in the end. The writing is compelling but the story is very intense. It is eerie to read of her drive to be a writer (like her mother), to cycle through therapy and medications (like her mother), and to attempt suicide (like her mother). Unlike her mother, she has lived longer than her. Survival can be its own victory.
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17 of 21 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Anne Sexton, redux March 20, 2011
By Idgie42
Format:Hardcover
I don't discount the veracity of Linda Sexton's struggle with depression. I don't doubt that Anne Sexton would have been a hell of a mother to have. What I find taxing (and outright frustrating) about this memoir is the constant presence of Anne Sexton in every move the author makes. Surely not EVERYTHING that happens in our adult lives can or should be connected to our parents. A legacy of suicide? What about creating one's own destiny? Just about every rotten thing or thought Linda has (even now, it seems) she is able to connect back to her mother in some way. Sheesh. At what point is our life our responsibility? Now in her 50s, Linda Sexton lives with the ghost of her mother's illness and her mother's success, evening naming her boat Mercy Street. I kept asking myself, When is Linda going TO GET she's not Anne Sexton? (I agree with her sister, Joy, who, according to Linda, feels Linda "stepped into" their mother's shoes after Anne Sexton's suicide.) I'd even go so far as to say Anne Sexton's suicide was the best career move Linda Sexton could make. Certainly, this is what I thought by the memoir's end.

Some of the writing in this memoir is so overwrought that I just had to laugh a bit. It drips with a self-awareness that seems to want to move us to tears or empathy or sympathy. It's not poetic so much as it is intended to show us the breadth of Linda's language and just what a poet she is. I was unmoved because it comes off as pretentious. What's more, the deeper I got into the book, I found it hard to not wonder at the privilege that enables Linda Sexton to live with and profit from the ghost of her mother. By the author's own admission, her ex-husband's checks keep her in the lifestyle to which she's become accustomed; she knows the exact dates her health insurance stops covering the hospital stays; the laundry man comes on Tuesdays; Angelina, the cleaning woman, comes to clean the messy dishes (and Linda's feels shame at her behavior, what with Angelina having been a doctor in Mexico and now a cleaning woman in the US); etc.,etc. Even during the darkest moments Linda has the wherewithal to go to her local bookstore and comment that her mother's books are still on the shelves while hers are gone. All of that pales in comparison to the place in the memoir where Linda lost me for good: her presence of mind, during her second suicide attempt, in an airport parking garage, to phone her sons while they're at McDonald's with their dad, to say goodbye (because her mother hadn't said goodbye to her). She didn't want to do that to them. Indeed. Linda Sexton is working now on a third memoir. I wonder if Anne will make yet another appearance?
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8 of 9 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Worth the Candle January 16, 2011
Format:Hardcover
Linda Gray Sexton's struggle with her family legacy of depression and suicide has been no walk in the park. The daughter of the poet Anne Sexton, Linda approaches her subject with bravery and grace. In the earlier memoir, "Searching for Mercy Street", she wrote of her relationship with her mother, whose successful suicide she hoped never to emulate. " Half in Love" traces her subsequent journey including several unsuccessful suicide attempts and the work it took to return from these episodes and reconnect with her world and family.

The author risks taking us deep into her thinking as a bi-polar person slipping toward suicide. She portrays its seductive nature. She explains cutting in a way that makes a certain sense. Her subtle depiction of feeling is equally profound as her health improves.

"Half in Love" is a brave, difficult book by a terrific writer. By honestly confronting her illness and the family members who have been hurt by it, Linda Gray Sexton saves her life. By sharing this experience, she offers readers a deeper understanding of their own.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Gripping and honest
A beautifully written and brutally honest account of the author's mental instabilities and family history that led her to attempt to take her own life. Read more
Published 2 months ago by T. Bentson
5.0 out of 5 stars Half in Love:
This was a terrific follow-up to "Searching for Mercy Street." Her story is fascinating itself, and the mental health facets reach out to those of us who suffer, and... Read more
Published 4 months ago by Elizabeth M.
5.0 out of 5 stars Haunting, riveting, a book with a powerful message about suicide
My mother would not allow me to date when I wanted to. My father would not let me drive the car. We all have the same thoughts; I am not going to be my mother or my father. Read more
Published 14 months ago by Donna McBroom-Theriot
4.0 out of 5 stars Abusive parents make for a lifelong struggle of emotional pain
Intense, sad. I related to the author's lifelong struggle over having an abusive, incestuous mother. Read more
Published 20 months ago by Bette
3.0 out of 5 stars Where's the Magic?
From the LGS memoir (p. 145, chatting with a lesbian while in a psych ward after a suicide attempt):

"Are you a cutter? Read more
Published on April 30, 2011 by riverscircus
4.0 out of 5 stars Important Book
Linda Sexton's memoir of mental illness and suicide attempts will clearly not be everyone's cup of tea. Read more
Published on February 22, 2011 by Amira
3.0 out of 5 stars legacy of suicide vs. psychiatric drugs
The author's story is compelling, but I read this book right after finishing Robert Whitaker's "Anatomy of An Epidemic: Magic Bullets, Psychiatric Drugs, and the Astonishing Rise... Read more
Published on February 20, 2011 by Avid Reader
5.0 out of 5 stars Beautifully written memoir that changed the way I see suicide and...
Linda Gray Sexton grew up watching her mother's multiple suicide attempts until she finally succeeded when Linda was in college. Read more
Published on February 15, 2011 by L. Fannon
5.0 out of 5 stars A pediatrician's review of Linda Sexton's book, "Half In Love"
My heart tells me that physicians, along with many others, need to read a special kind of memoir. A memoir such as Linda Sexton has written could teach us almost everything we... Read more
Published on February 10, 2011 by Howard King, MD
5.0 out of 5 stars The Best Book about Bipolar Disorder
This book made me happy at the end of it. I can't describe the positive feelings that I had that finally Linda was out of pain! Read more
Published on February 7, 2011 by Marsha Gifford
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