Customer Reviews

Hammerhead

5 star:		(2)
4 star:		(0)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(5)

 

 

One reviewer claimed this was a typical sharkman movie. I don't think there have been enough sharkman movies to define a typical, but it does fit the mad scientist mode that was so popular for so long.

Jeffrey Combs is a disgruntled scientist with an axe to grind. He has retreated to an island where he has set up a small empire complete with army (funny how discredited scientist always seem to have huge fortunes). There he has crossed a man with a hammerhead shark and is trying to enhance the human elements as well as breed a new race of man. Unfortunately the creature seems to prefer eating women to mating with them and Combs never seems to hit on the idea of artificial insemination.

A corporate science team has arrived to view Combs's stem cell research but they quickly learn the truth behind their invitation. The island is full of all sorts of crossbreeds, particularly carnivorous plants and all of the corporate scientists seem top act like ex-commandos.

I expected a slightly different ending or cliffhanger that never materialized and there were plot paths that were never explored or exploited. Plus we never get a clear view of the creature so the special effects folks never had to figure out hoe to make it move realistically. This is fence-sitting film that has elements to make it good as well as bad.

Hammerhead is a movie about a half-man half-shark. Just click "x."

Still with me? Good. In Hammerhead, and evil doctor whose name I forgot invites a bunch of random people to his evil laboratory. (I'll refer to him as "Dr. Alberfesto" from this point, since that's probably his name anyway.) Maybe they got golden tickets, or perhaps Dr. Alberfesto sent a blood-stained invitation via red-eyed skeleton vulture, I can't really remember. Dr. Alberfesto invited these people to show them a scientific breakthrough of his. That being, he genetically combined his son who had cancer with a shark, as to cure him of his illness. (Makes perfect sense.) "You're mad!" one of the random main characters gasped. Dr. Alberfesto, feeling that his sanity was possibly in question, excused himself from the room. ...And activated a button that released the tank containing his mutant son. Dr. Alberfesto, like all great villains, rested comfortably with the knowledge his visitors were dead.

However, in an astute display of competence, one of Dr. Alberfeso's guards dropped an assault rifle in the room before leaving, for no apparent reason. The shark monster was unleashed, sometimes appearing in its rubber glory for a full nanosecond before the ADD-afflicted cameraman veered into some brick wall. Apparently this movie takes place in an alternate dimension where gunpowder works when it gets wet, because one of the random main characters dived under, grabbed the rifle, and fired off a few shots. After this clumsy exchange, out heroes noticed a convenient ladder leading out of the room. In a shocking twist, Dr. Alberfesto was in fact watching this on his evil-cam with his fingers connected, perhaps twirling his mustache. He revealed in one of the most asinine plot devices ever, that his shark-son hunting the main characters would awaken a more docile and human psyche in him for some reason.

The next few scenes were feral and visceral observations of human desperation, prodding your innermost fears with lines like: "These shoes are ruined." The next hour or so shows our heroes vacantly wandering around in a forest, sometimes getting eaten by the mutant shark or getting poison ivy, and sometimes engaging in firefights choreographed by Malaysian slaves. At the end of the movie, all but two characters are dead. They are captured and taken back to Dr. Alberfesto's invariably evil laboratory.

Our female lead woke up upside-down on a contraption that lowered into a tank of water containing the mutant shark. The evil scientist explained that he planned on his mutant shark son mating with her. Maybe this isn't painfully stupid, and the director was trying to satisfy an underplayed fetish of some sort. Anyway... I'm not complaining about a lack of gratuitous nudity, but apparently sharks now know how to remove articles of clothing. Sharks are vicious, but I can't imagine even them easily impregnating someone through a pair of panties. The other main character totally unexpectedly charged in Rambo-style, spraying the mutant shark with liquid nitrogen until he exploded. Somehow. Some other stuff happens and fin.

Explaining this movie was like watching it twice, which may require therapy. It wasn't offensively stupid on all levels, which is why it sucked so immensely. It was like the director wasn't expecting Hammerhead to be bad, so he made sure it took itself seriously; crafting one of the most dull, corny, and unintentionally pretentious insomnia-remedies in quite some time.
- Thus says the Pellington

This is not a great movie. Nor is it even a very good movie. But it's not terrible, and in the genre of B monster films it gets the job done. And unlike a lot of these films, it's not boring.

The premise of a sharkman hunting down a group of victims as they struggle to escape an island ruled by a madman is nothing special. The acting is decent. The script has a few holes here and there, but they're generally small and easy to overlook. I actually liked some of the characters, and though I wouldn't probably watch it again, it's worth seeing once as long as the expectations aren't too high.

The biggest weakness of the film is in the special effects. The sharkman actually looks pretty good, but the death scenes are largely shots of people being "edited" to death. In other words, there's a shot of the sharkman coming at the camera, followed by a shot of a screaming victim, followed by a shot of blood. But hey, it's still a fair job for a small film.

Will you love it? Probably not. Will you feel you wasted an hour and a half of your life watching it? Yes. But let's be honest, you probably would've wasted that time anyway. So why not enjoy an okay movie while you're at it?

WARNING: possible spoilers ahead...

Where the hell are all these uncharted islands where prehistoric monsters lurk, evil doctors perform their experiments, madmen hold the ultimate karate championship, and the uber-rich hunt humans for sport? I had no idea there were still so many uncharted islands out there, but if you take into account the number of movies that utilize one of these mysterious islands as a location, you'd have to assume that there are at least 50 of these suckers out there. It always winds up feeling so damned convenient and I immediately deduct points from any movie that uses this hackneyed device. Hammerhead is the story of a mad scientist who is conducting experiments on one of these uncharted islands, so the movie already had a lot to make up for before it even began.

The island in this movie used to belong to Dr. Moreau, but has recently been purchased by the Re-Animator himself, Jeffrey Combs. Old Jeffrey is doing some kind of cutting edge stem cell research, which has led him to start working with sharks while searching for a cure for cancer. If that sounds familiar, that's because this is roughly the same basic set-up as the smart shark facility in Deep Blue Sea, not to mention a host of other Nu Image movies. So apparently, Jeffrey's son was dying of cancer which prompted our mad doctor to start experimenting on his progeny. He did some kind of super fancy gene splicing and so forth, turning his son into a shark-man.

William Forsythe leads a crew of unknown actors to the island to look into the doctor's experiments. If someone would have given him a sailor's hat, William would have been a dead ringer for the Skipper from Gilligan's Island. In typical Bond Villain fashion, the doctor decides that all of these intruders would make nice chum for his son. Not chums, like buddies... chum, like shark food. So enter shark-boy who starts stalking the Skipper and his cohorts all over the island. They, of course, make half-hearted attempts to escape and are thwarted over and over again while being chased by a guy in a rubber shark-man suit.

The movie didn't make up any of the points that it lost for taking place on one of those dastardly deserted islands. It's funny that this movie is called Hammerhead, it made me think of an old joke. Why do you hit yourself in the head with a hammer? Because it feels so good when you stop. That's pretty much how this movie is. The only reason to watch it is because it feels so good when it's over.

A mad scientist's son is half-hammerhead shark. Dad wants to find him a mate. Hot woman winds up on their island. Lingerie bondage ensues. Bad guys lose, no honeymoon for shark boy. Stuff blows up. Ridiculous, but better than 89 percent of other B-movies. Worth a buck or two.

I can't believe this stinker even made it to the Dollar Rental rack at my local grocery store. What a worthless piece of junk. I feel cheated paying a buck to rent it. Shame on the actors that demeaned themselves in the making of such a dog.

My hat goes off to the individual who came up with this. Just when I thought there was nothing else that could possibly be done with shark movies, they pull this.... thing from the bottom of the barrel.

So what would you do if your son dies prematurely of cancer? What any other loving parent would. Fuse his stem cells with shark cells, so that your son can live eternally. (This was actually quoted in the movie. HMMM Never knew sharks couldn't die. Apparently the writers of Shark Attack 3: Megaladon didn't do their homework.)

So let your imagination run wild with this. A group of scientists come to an island to see a DNA fusion. Little do they know that they are going to get trapped in a room with a half man, half shark. They escape with the help of William Forsythe. (Who rose to fame and fortune as Ritchie in the Blockbuster hit Out For Justice. By the way, Anybody SEEN Ritchie???) Forsythe had to practice months for this Rambo-esque character. But not long enough to lose that beer belly. Anyway they get hunted, die one at a time, kill the scientist, kill the shark creature (that you never really see), and have a delightful tea party at the end.

All in all if you like terrible shark movies, and who doesn't, try this one on for size. After all, you can't go wrong with.... HAMMERHEAD!

I apologize to Michael Oblowitz. I once wrote a review for the Steven Seagal flick "The Foreigner" in which I blasted this director. If I remember correctly, I think I called him a hack who would never work in Hollywood again. Obviously, I was wrong. Not only did Oblowitz lens another Seagal film, "Out for a Kill," he moved on to make this movie, the jaw droppingly horrific, 2005 made for television clunker "Hammerhead". I didn't know my man Oblowitz directed this sucker when I initially stumbled over the premise on the Internet a ways back. All I saw was a description that said a half man, half shark creation made by an evil scientist wreaks havoc on a bunch of hapless fools. Moreover, "Hammerhead" got the green light from the friendly folks over at the Sci Fi Channel. I knew I was shark bait after reading that description. A human/shark hybrid? The Sci Fi Channel? I'm there with bells on! Sure enough, I found myself out hunting for a copy shortly thereafter. My elation grew as I looked at the cast list. The presence of the venerable William Forsythe and the even more venerable Jeffrey Combs heightened my excitement. Here's a cheese classic for the ages, I thought.

I was wrong. Oh, it's cheesy all right, but "Hammerhead" will hardly stand the test of time that every classic must go through. Read on to find out why. The mad scientist Dr. Preston King (Combs) invites a bunch of corporate types to his research facility on an uncharted island. The members of this group include Amelia Lockhart (Hunter Tylo), her beau Tom Reed (Forsythe), Whitney Feder (Arthur Roberts), and a bunch of other folks I refer to as walking chum. Anyway, they go to the island in order to discover what King has been spending all the company's money on for the last few years. The answer becomes readily apparent as the completely insane Preston introduces us to his newest creation. Enter Hammerhead man, a human/shark hybrid that King hopes to make the dominant species on earth. Uh huh. In the meantime, he announces that his visiting dignitaries must now die at the hands of his creation. Maybe he's trying to get rid of witnesses or something. Of course, most of our heroes escape the assassination attempt. Now they must run around the island trying to avoid shark boy and King's mercenary army (!). Lots of bloody carnage ensues, along with a fair amount of unintentional hilarity.

As the story progresses, we learn the movie has a few nasty little secrets. One, shark boy is actually King's terminally ill son. The good doctor saved his child from the ravages of cancer only to turn him into this monstrosity. Two, Amelia Lockhart once had a relationship with Preston's son. Three, and most importantly, King hopes that his ugly little monster will breed with a human woman so that the subsequent offspring will go forth and conquer the world. Don't look at me; I didn't write the script. Anyway, after endless running around and a few deaths (along with a few cheesy encounters with Mr. Hammerhead man, revealed in confusing, quick cut editing fashion in order to hide the zipper) the movie grinds into its inevitable final part. Oddly, the picture turns from a fairly mundane and ridiculous beastie flick into a kill 'em all actioner as the surviving characters open up a can of whupass on King's mercenary force. It's nice to know corporate executives know how to use assault weapons. They must have sandwiched in that training between operating a copier and forwarding e-mail using Outlook Express. Do I really need to go on? Not really, but I will anyway.

"Hammerhead" would have tanked at the box office had the film actually received a theatrical run. It's likely it would have tanked on DVD if idiots like myself hadn't run right out to rent a copy. How could it have succeeded? Nearly every element of the film misfires in horrific ways. Especially egregious are the lame special effects used to realize Hammerhead Man. I've seen more believable effects in a grade school play than I did in this movie. The beastie looks terribly unconvincing, and even more so when the quick cut editing techniques come into play. In an effort to hide the creature's glaring flaws, the camera tricks actually draw the viewer's attention to just how ridiculous this thing looks. Sigh. Another problem involved the direction. Take a close look at the Rambo style action scenes at the end of the flick. Was it just me or did the choreography look really bad? It's hard to follow what's happening. Oh well. The movie isn't without a few positives, mainly Jeffrey Combs on autocamp as the lunatic Dr. King and William Forsythe as a keister-kicking executive. Hunter Tylo's bod adds much needed eye candy to the proceedings. These positives are NOT enough to overcome the film's inherent flaws, however.

It is my sad duty to report to you that the DVD version of "Hammerhead" comes with zero in the way of extras. Yes sir, we're dealing with a barebones disc here. I'm actually not surprised that we don't get a commentary track, cast and crew interviews, or behind the scenes footage. Why would anyone working on or starring in this movie want to promote his or her efforts? It's not like they'll win an award for a movie named "Hammerhead". Moreover, it helps to keep a low profile when making a picture like this one if an actor or actress wishes to work in Hollywood again. On a final note: when did Hunter Tylo start looking like a clone of Janine Turner? I'd throttle back on the plastic surgery if I were you, lady. I like your body, but you're a few botox injections away from being cast in the sequel as the beastie!

first of all, there is only one reason to see this movie--JEFFREY COMBS. I bought this crap(and I knew it) at my local BLOCKBUSTER. special effects: POOR, acting: (what acting?), more like overacting and that can be fun to watch too--overall, POOR, plot: revenge, eating humans, and so many plot holes I lost count. now, the good points: HUNTER TYLO, while not naked you do see her hanging upside down in a bra(worth it)--JEFFREY COMBS, his mad scientist roles are never bad to watch---NOW HE IS A GREAT ACTOR(love ya jeffrey--too cool, too funny). this is great movie if you are burned out on intellectual garbage and your brain needs a rest. put your popcorn in and sit down. it was bad but it was great. 1-star, but fun

Never has a usually reputable actor looked so uncomfortable and out of place as William Forsythe in this horrendous SciFi Channel movie called HAMMERHEAD. Forsythe, a really competent actor, plays an IT expert who becomes a Rambo-like hero, wet t-shirt and all. He is joined by Hunter Tylo, a marine biologist, who matches his Rambo shennanigans shot for shot, in this preposterous and ludicrous tale of genetic experimentation. Jeffrey Combs (REANIMATOR) is the mad scientist and its probably the worst I've seen him in his many films. The sharkman is never seen enough to judge the effects, but what one can see is pretty shoddy. The movie offers no suspense and is so jumbled, it's a real farce. Avoid if you can.