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Happiness Is a Serious Problem: A Human Nature Repair Manual

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Whether or not you are a fan of Dennis Prager's talk shows, a half-hour with this book will prove to you that, not only can this man think, but he has an incomparable gift for elucidating one of life's key preoccupations: the trials and tribulations associated with one's quest for happiness. For me, this book is not so much of a "repair manual," as it is one of the most insightful, succinctly written books on how happiness is linked to human nature, philosophy, morals, temperament and values.

Mr. Prager writes: "The greatest battle for happiness is with our own nature." If we can look inward and understand our drives and the intrinsic characteristics of what it means to be human, we then can use our intellect, spirituality and relationships with others to develop a stronger affinity for happiness. Or, perhaps, create in happiness an affinity for us.

The author divides the book into three parts consisting of thirty-one chapters. If read from front to back, the book flows nicely from "Premises" to "Major Obstacles..." to "Attitudes and Behaviors That are Essential to Happiness." What I especially like is that the individual chapters stand alone, and are great for highlighting the author's views on very specific issues and problems. The most interesting ones deal with the dilemma between happiness and fun, the problems with expectations, and the preponderance of victimhood in today's world. Prager has some profound views on these, and many other topics. He makes you think.

Overall, "Happiness..." turned out to be enlightening and quite easy to read (you won't need a dictionary by your side). I'd rank it at the top of my list (also check out "When Bad Things Happen to Good People") of books dealing with life's disappointments and successes, emotion and human nature.

Dennis Prager, a devout Jew, helped bring me to Christ through years of listening to his radio commentaries and reading his books and essays. His clear-thinking and insight to man's eternal dilemma can help anyone searching for meaning in his life, and for a personal relationship with God.

But Mr. Prager's book on happiness does us all a service while we spend our time here on earth, muddling through the complexities of every day life.

One of the keys to happiness, Mr. Prager rightly suggests, is that expectations inevitably result in unhappiness. This is a wonderful insight to why so many today are frustrated, angry and unhappy in a society that touts the entitlement mindset, the thinking that we are automatically entitled to things, including happiness.

If you can set aside your expectations suddenly everything good that enters your life becomes a blessing. What do you appreciate more, the gift you've demanded or the one you didn't expect?

Hang on to your expectations and you can expect to be dissatisfied when they aren't met, and unappreciative when they do come true - after all, you expected to get it and felt that you deserved it, so why should you appreciate it?

Integral to happiness is appreciation. Unappreciative people are simply unhappy people. They are people who expect life to cater to them, so consequently are bitter when it doesn't and unappreciative when it does.

This book should be required reading in all schools, particularly on college campuses where so many expect life to cater to them. But it applies equally well to all ages.

Buy this book for anyone you'd like to help find happiness.

As I read the few negative reviews of this book, the critics all seem to be commenting about Dennis the radio talk show host (whom they may disagree with on some political issue or another), not the contents of this book. The weakness of the book: It is based on common sense and not backed up by thousands of clinical studies to verify up each and every claim; thus at times, it seems a little surface and simplistic. The strength of this book: It is based on common sense and not backed up by thousands of clinical studies to verify up each and every claim; thus it is void of a thousand qualifying "but sometimes..." and instead is simple, clear and to the point. Just as we say, on reading an insightful movie review, "that makes perfect sense; that's exactly what I've always felt but just didn't know how to put it into words quite so clearly," so most people will say after reading each chapter: Yes, exactly, someone's finally put it into words! Congratulations, Dennis.

It's great. I have read this twice, and given it to a number of friends who have also enjoyed it. Prager takes a hard look at what causes happiness in a number of short chapters which grew out of speeches he's given in the past. He differentiates between true happiness which can permeate a life and fun which is temporary and immediate. Most all of us say that we seek happiness yet we seldom give it as much real consideration as we do choosing a new kitchen tile. Prager looks first at what happiness is, then what prevents it, and finally what produces it. This isn't a fluffy "feel good" read by any stretch. He says that true happiness is the result of sometimes difficult life decisions. Chapters include "Happiness is a Moral Obligation", "Accept Tension", "Develop Self-control", "Happiness is a By-product", "Life is tragic", "Comparing Ourselves with Others", and "Seeing Yourself as a Victim" among others.

This material is direct and to the point. A number of concepts have stuck with me and changed my outlook and behavior. I see this as a must read for myself numerous times in the future.

After buying this book you'll have no excuse not to be happier.

(FYI - Reading this book encouraged me to investigate Prager further and I discovered that he is a clear thinker on a range of subjects.........

This book is part common sense, part moral philosophy, part self-help encouragement -- and thought-provoking through and through. Even if you don't agree with Mr. Prager's stance, his clarity and conviction will help you arrive at your own position.

I first heard Dennis Prager on a Focus on the Family broadcast. Since then, I've started listening to his daily radio show which I find much like this book -- passionately and clearly presented; filled with relevant, daily examples; and thought-provoking even if you don't agree with his positions. A perfect example of this is in Chapter 21 of this book, where Mr. Prager argues, "As important as happiness is, if you make it your most important value, you cannot attain it. Happiness is only achievable when it is a by-product of something else, and you must hold that something to be more important than happiness." The rest of the chapter goes on to describe six candidate values more important than happiness (e.g., passionate and meaingful pursuits, wisdom, clarity, pursuit of the transcendent). Whether or not you agree with his proposition, you have to admit it's a provocative thesis.

One of the things I most enjoy about Mr. Prager's writing is that it never gets too abstract. He'll make a general point but quickly illustrate the point with a set of real-life examples and practial implications for your daily life.

Mr. Prager has many Christian fans and has contributed much to interfaith dialog between Christians and Jews. Having just finished this book, I understand why: the values described in this book resonate perfectly with Christian values. (Though Christians would probably use the word "joy" rather than "happiness", as in C.S. Lewis' "Surprised By Joy".)

I recommend this book for those who think that "Judaeo-Christian" is a contribed label that whitewashes over major differences in Jewish and Christian teaching on life, the purpose of life, and God. This book shines a spotlight on the many values both Jews and Christians hold in common.

People who enjoyed Rick Warren's "Purpose-Driven Life" will also enjoy this book for its clarity, powerful writing, compelling examples, and freedom from religious or philosophical jargon.

I read this book twice last month, and once last year. I wrote so much in the margins, and on any piece of paper that I could get my hands on. I felt as though I was a kindred spirit with the author. And, I especially enjoyed his anticipation of religious people's argument against personal growth. I know that I will read this book again, between other books, especially after I read novels that contain emotional pain. Reading this book, has guided me to heal many old wounds, and to demand of myself to let go of past unmet expectations. It also has me more open to study religion, from an historial and social side.

Probably the most amusing anecdote in Dennis Prager's "Happiness Is a Serious Problem" concerns a Jewish rabbi who is unhappy because he can't find a suitable wife. When Prager asked the rabbi what qualities he was looking for in a woman, the rabbi's reply was: "A Playboy bunny who studies the Torah."

You can probably guess what Prager's advice was, and what his worldview is regarding the relationship between happiness and expectations. Really, what this book is largely about is contentment -- finding ways to be satisfied with the status quo. Certainly he advocates doing what is intelligent and reasonable to change the circumstances if you so desire, but that most of our problems stem from dissatisfaction with situations that are perfectly acceptable, even though they fall short of our preferences.

In any book that dispenses common-sense advice, the greatest risk is that of oversimplification. Inevitably, Prager falls into that trap at various points. Fortunately, he never makes the mistake of implying that the kinds of shifts in perspective he advocates are easy to make.

Further, Prager suggests that a spiritual life -- with its implicit realization that there are some things we simply do not understand, but must nevertheless come to terms with -- is a desirable thing. This, too, mitigates the extent to which he might be perceived as understating the world's complexities.

I purchased the audio cassette version of the book, primarily because I'm most familiar with Prager as a radio personality, and it seemed appropriate to have these observations conveyed to me in a similar way.

A fresh perspective and bright outlook on happiness. It is ironic that in this advanced stage of man's evolution, real happiness is still an unknown to many. Man can now move moutains at the push of a button and yet basic happiness and personal fulfillment eludes us. Perhaps it is our tendency to see ourselves as a body with a soul when it should be the other way around. Then things will start to have a different meaning. Happy reading to all!!!

Interesting and very thought provoking. Concise and clear. Prager points out what isn't obvious to many: yes, you work at becoming a happy person. It may take effort to temper some natural "lesser" tendencies and elevate better ones, and for some folks, alas, it is just easier to be unhappy. But the discipline to train your thinking and habits that will make you enjoy life more is also a labor of love, and respect, for those around us. The book is worth it for the chapter on expectations alone.

The reviewers who have attacked Prager for his "hypocrisy" and "exclusivism" have definitely misread this book!

In "Happiness" and his other books, Prager does not eschew materialism; he merely advocates prioritization and self-realization. Prager teaches that the key to "happiness" is not perpetual entertainment, but understanding our own values -- and making sure we choose high-quality, lasting values.

Does he assert that certain values are higher than others? Sure! But in an era when moral relativism is rapidly overtaking common sense, Prager's approach is a cool breeze in the stifling room of Political Correctness.

Even if I don't always agree with him -- as so many of his callers say, to his great amusement -- Prager is a clear thinker, and, illuminated by his biblical and practical perspective, this book is a much-needed discussion of the kind of happiness all of us need in our lives.