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4.6 out of 5 stars
Happy Endings: The Tales of a Meaty-Breasted Zilch
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79 of 89 people found the following review helpful
Format: Hardcover
I bought this book for my actor-friend Robert. He needed a few laughs and distractions between doses of AZT, and needless to say, it was a complete success. Luckily he was confined to a robe...otherwise he would've busted his pants laughing.

He's no longer with us, but those days reading this book were some of his happiest.

Silence = Death
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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
on July 9, 2007
Format: Hardcover
jim norton is one of the most intelligent and hilarious child rapists this country has ever known. take your money and give it to him so that it will become his money.
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19 of 21 people found the following review helpful
Format: Hardcover
LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLil jimmy is a silly goose, but a great story teller! Thats terrible, I'm sorry.
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27 of 32 people found the following review helpful
on July 5, 2007
Format: Hardcover
I listen to the Ramone and Frunkkkkkis show all the time and when this gentleman comes on the air I always have a good laugh! One time when discussing eating cake Jim Norton said: "Moment on the lips, lifetime on the hips!" And my chums and I all had a nice chuckle. He is also the inventor of "Cat noise thurdseey's" (Not to be confuseed with phone call Thursday's) in which listeners phone the show and give their best cat noise impersonation! It's swell! James was also heckling a hooker from his car once and before he could get away, she took off his glasses and broke them. Jimmy, nearly blind, was forced to consult a policeman for help. Also, Steve from Yellowstone never sounded so funny as when he told Marge from the "Little Animal Shelter" to clutch her chest and fall face first into a litter box!

What a great read while your waiting for your warsh to finish!
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17 of 19 people found the following review helpful
on July 9, 2007
Format: Hardcover
In memory of the late great James Norton I read this book under my porch with a neighbor boy after a game of monster rain. James you will be love and you will be missed. RIP FFFFFFRRRRRUUUUUUMMMMPPPPPKKIIIISSSSS
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16 of 18 people found the following review helpful
on July 8, 2007
Format: Hardcover
Jim gives a very stern warning at the beginning of the book and it's something that really needs to be adhered to. If you are a fan of the Opie & Anthony Show & of L'il Jim Norton or just a fan of edgy self-deprecating humor, you'll love this book. I've been Ell-O-Elling from the warning on. If you're a stick in the mud, you should read this as well - you might actually do something you haven't done in awhile - laugh without worrying about your face breaking. MEOW
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12 of 13 people found the following review helpful
Format: Hardcover
As any true fan of Jim Norton knows this book is a must buy, just look at these latest reviews:

"It's great!!!" - Opie

"It's terrific!!!" - Anthony

"........" - Joel Siegel

Everyone seems to love it and so do I!!! I'm going to read it again and again maybe next time I'll read it at:

Barnes & Nobles on 7/11 at 6:00pm
1805 Walnut St - Philadelphia, PA 19103

OR AT

Bookends on 7/12 at 7:00pm
232 East Ridgewood Ave - Ridgewood, NJ 07450

OR AT

Barnes & Nobles on 7/13 at 7:30pm
3040 M Street NW - Washington, DC 20007

OR AT

Borders on 7/14 at 2:00pm
2015 Walden Ave. - Cheektowaga, NY 14225

OR AT

Borders on 7/14 at 7:00pm
1000 Hylan Drive - Rochester, NY 14623

OR AT

Borders on 7/17 at 7:30pm
2817 North Clarke Street - Chicago, Il 60657

It sure does sound swell, don't it? Come for the autographs and stay for the tusssles. See you there!
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12 of 13 people found the following review helpful
on July 10, 2007
Format: Hardcover
As an actor, Jimmy always seemed to have problems knowing what to do with his hands. As a radio personality he seems to have problems keeping his hands off his junk but as a writer his hands are doing just fine swiping at all that seems wrong in Jimmy world, sheltering his boyish face from the monster rain and occasionally swatting stupid Vos in the Nogin.
Jimmys first foray into the literary world is a hit from page one and after a few hours reading time one is left flacid with a sore rib cage and a full hog waiting for Steve Carlissi to come over and massage the swinging pendulum between your legs. With a sexy cover as an added bonus all thats left is to wish Jimmy good luck bro! GRRRR at the competition as our L'il cutie pie arrives on the Hoo's Hoo list of NY comedic literary talent. A happy ending indeed! Meow!
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19 of 22 people found the following review helpful
on July 2, 2007
Format: Hardcover
Tolstoy, Hemmingway, Kafka, and now adding another name to the ilk of these great writers, Norton. This book is phenomenal. Lil Jimmy is the greatest. Who else but him can make AIDS and kid touching warm our hearts. I say that this meaty-breasted zilch is my hero, and if you can find the time Jim, i'd love to go under the porch with you and get a little meep meep...give me those ribs you.
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12 of 13 people found the following review helpful
on July 9, 2007
Format: Hardcover
Many look to the Bible for guidance and lessons to help them with their miserable lives. After flipping through this literary tour-de-force by Opie and Anthony's cuddly little buddy Jim "Meep Meep" Norton, it's quite evident that there is finally a book that not only rivals the holy scriptures in their wisdom and social significance, there is a book that makes them obsolete. Norton studied under the likes of Vonnegut, Twain and Rich Vos for the greater part of his life and this book - a massive undertaken which reportedly took nearly 25 years to complete - is the fruit of that labor. If you only buy one book in your lifetime, make sure it's "Happy Endings: The Tales of a Meaty-Breasted Zilch."
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