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39 of 42 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Entertaining, Accurate, and Insightful
Half-memoir, half-gonzo, Happy Hour Is For Amateurs is greater than the sum of its autobiographical parts. Ultimately, the book is a morality play; the deadly sins are sacrificing happiness for a paycheck and perpetuating the status quo in a morally bankrupt industry.

Some readers may object to the author's profanity and depiction of drug and alcohol use--of...
Published on October 2, 2008 by Bart

versus
7 of 8 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Lots of sex and drugs, not so much law
"Happy hour is for Amateurs" is an anonymous memoir written by the author of the wildly successful "Philadelphia Lawyer" blog. While it was cleverly written and quite funny, my sense after reading this book is that it is unlikely to improve the image of the legal profession or its practitioners. Much of the book is devoted to descriptions of the author's binge-drinking...
Published on August 7, 2008 by Monica J. Kern


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39 of 42 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Entertaining, Accurate, and Insightful, October 2, 2008
By 
Bart (Houston, TX) - See all my reviews
Half-memoir, half-gonzo, Happy Hour Is For Amateurs is greater than the sum of its autobiographical parts. Ultimately, the book is a morality play; the deadly sins are sacrificing happiness for a paycheck and perpetuating the status quo in a morally bankrupt industry.

Some readers may object to the author's profanity and depiction of drug and alcohol use--of course, some readers call Mark Twain "racist" and Aldous Huxley "immoral." In other words, if you have a weak constitution or delicate sensibilities, this book probably isn't for you.

This book is for: (1) every worker who's ever felt like a cog or an itinerant, (2) every person who thinks, "this is as good as it gets for me," and (3) anyone who enjoys funny, insightful writing on topics most people can relate to. From the book: "There's an accidental wisdom in following. Letting something else define you narrows the decisions you have to make. It gives you parameters, a track to follow and a holiday from all the angst that comes with carving your own path." `Following' is exactly what some people need--this book is for everyone else.

Happy Hour Is For Amateurs is not a book about being a lawyer, it's a book about being unsatisfied with what you do. (Though it's completely, depressingly accurate if you want to know what the actual practice of law is like for the majority of attorneys.) It's about settling and the push-pull of childhood dreams--and adult dreams--against the weight of responsibility and expectations. Philalawyer escaped, and most of us haven't, a fact sure to generate equal measures of envy and hostility. Either way, this book is compulsory reading for every disaffected office monkey, every fungible bureaucrat.

The writing is always serviceable and frequently soars. Some readers may quibble with the non-linear style--but this isn't a novel, and each chapter contributes something important on the way to understanding the overall ethic of the author. The momentum slows very occasionally, but the humor underlying each vignette is more than enough to
excuse the occasional digression.

Lawyers, in particular, will nod their heads in agreement or sympathy throughout Philalawyer's book. Equity partners in big law firms might not get it, and associates on the same track will probably ignore it. The rest of us will say, "Thank you," and buy him a drink.
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29 of 31 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I'm not a lawyer from Philadelphia, but I can sure as hell relate., October 2, 2008
The introductory author's note concludes with Sergeant Hulka's memorable line from Stripes "Lighten up, Francis" and it sets the tone for what's to come. Occasionally, pre-release examination copies will cross my desk, but this was the first book to inspire me to jump on Amazon and write a review.

Happy Hour is for Amateurs is not for everyone. If you're easily offended, you might do better to avoid the book. More importantly, if you rely on cognitive dissonance to get through 9-5 life, then the book might shake your fragile mental farce a little too violently.

Philadelphia Lawyer tells the story of a young man fresh out of college who is beaten down over the course of a decade in the legal profession. The lines between work and play, misery and happiness are often blurred, and each chapter is a slightly different take following an overarching theme of discontent leading to self-actualization. Perhaps the author's greatest strength is his ability to maintain a fast-paced, page-turning plot while interspersing insightful anecdotes that put into words all the random thoughts I've had about corporate culture, leaving me wondering "why the hell didn't I write this?" Yet, at the same time, I realize that it takes great craft to make life's mundanity compelling.

Philadelphia Lawyer writes like a man who isn't afraid to write. So often writers are concerned with what others might think; what literary conventions or technicalities to abide by in order to appeal to a certain crowd, but in this book the language comes relentless and unrestrained. Pop culture references from the last half century blend seamlessly with serious deliberations on legal culture and its implications on sanity. Finally, somebody is writing in an honest way about the world the forty and under population grew up in.

Immersed in a mass of workaholic drones all too eager to bill their way to the top, the narrator turns to mind-altering substances to cope with his sad reality. His sexual exploits left me laughing and cringing all at once, but the trick is Philadelphia Lawyer tells the story like you're in on the joke. One doesn't have to identify exactly with his debauchery, but instead with the potential of that act's occurrence. That maybe, if the stars had aligned differently, it might have been me running from the cops in a blizzard - merely entertaining the thought reminds us that the world isn't as serious as everyone seems to make it out to be.

Our egos are padded from childhood to make us believe there is a greater purpose behind all our actions. Despite what we're led to believe sometimes life really is a ridiculous charade - the only purpose being that there is none. Everybody has to earn a paycheck, and the need for food and shelter is a real one. Somehow in our drive to provide, we start taking everything serious. We forget how to take a joke and laugh at ourselves. Philadelphia Lawyer reminds us that enjoying the ride is more important than the end goal.

The sad truth is that without the humor, the subject would be an unbearable read. Hardly a page goes by without negative adjectives such as "rotten" "awful" "terrible" or "atrocious." As someone unaccustomed to the legal climate, the daily drudgery experienced within the plot really begin to wear. Just when I think "this can't possible get any worse" it does. I imagine lawyers may find themselves offended, but if so, they are missing the point. Philadelphia Lawyer does not blame the players, he blames a corrupt and immoral game. Nonetheless the players - whether a thirty year old gunner looking for the next promotion or a twenty-something drug dealer looking to latch on to anything - are held responsible for their own existence.

Among all the vulgarity and belligerence there is a very real message communicated. That message will resonate differently with everyone, but "do what you love and love what you do" sums it up nicely for me. Unfortunately it takes the legal profession, a concentrated embodiment of every occupational evil, to demonstrate what we're all failing to see. The end goal of life isn't to die.

For a first effort, it's no wonder Philadelphia Lawyer is already making waves in the legal and publishing community. A fresh voice that has emerged from a thankless, empty lifestyle with something to offer all of us. Happy Hour is for Amateurs is a book I recommend to anyone that's ever sat in a pub and complained about their day.

And Francis, before you get all worked up and self-righteous, remember: if you can't laugh at yourself, then everyone else will do it for you.
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19 of 20 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Engaging, brutal and hilarious, September 22, 2008
By 
C. Brown (New York City, NY) - See all my reviews
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This was an enormously entertaining book.

But before I jump into the superlatives, I think it's important to make a distinction between this book and the other bourbon-soaked tales of anal sex and professionally hazardous hangovers that this emerging genre has seen over the past few years. This book is more than the sum of its drugs, fornication and booze - it is a crushing social critique of a respected profession and of thousands of its practitioners. The author attacks the American legal system as a complicit antihero, publishing a decade worth of subversion. He portrays the frenetic courtroom, the golden shackles that bind him to his work and the familiar (for some of us) haze of substance abuse. Based on 10 years that would have driven most to a Xanax prescription, he manages to write one of the funniest books I've ever read.

And that's really what matters, right? Sure, there are strokes of brilliance and the sort of introspection that makes you want to step back and re-examine your own life. But there is also a swimsuit model trying to shoot herself in the face with a taser, a hockey team locked in the back of a Uhaul with a keg and few naked lesbians thrown in for good measure. And that's what life should be about.

Formulating my thoughts on this book took me a little while. This is due in part, I feel, to the author's willful disregard for the molds I like to fit books into. It's refreshing to read books like this - ones that challenge you. Fortunately, for all its complexity, it never loses itself; the tangents of the narrative never detract from the point. It is painfully funny and brutally honest; the sordid confession from a man who is not the least bit sorry.

I recommend it wholeheartedly.
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11 of 13 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars "To Evil!", August 12, 2008
By 
Erik Olson "Seeker Reviews" (Ridgefield, WA United States) - See all my reviews
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I read somewhere that there are more lawyers than doctors, firefighters, and police combined. Why the heck do we need so many of them? What's the appeal of the legal profession? I hoped that "Happy Hour is for Amateurs" would answer these questions and also brief me on a typical lawyer's life. I found some of the information I sought, but this review's title, from a toast made during one of the author's many epic benders, pretty much sums up his lurid and irreverent journey to self-realization.

The author's silver tongue initially drew him to law. He figured his gift of gab would allow him to become a legal eagle and easily make a fat paycheck. However, he became disillusioned with being a lawyer soon after scoring his first slot out of law school. Hoping to redeem his career choice, he tried switching firms and specialties, but each position seemed worse than the last. Even constant partying and profuse medication with fornication, drugs, and alcohol couldn't kill his deepening despair. Somewhere between debaucheries, the author managed to meet a woman, marry her, and father a child. This, along with a severe case of occupational angst, forced him to finally wake up and make a choice concerning his life's direction.

I did gain some insights into a lawyer's daily grind during the ten-year journey through The Philadelphia Lawyer's life, as well as inferring the answers to my above questions based upon his example. Between surfing porn and trading goof-off emails with friends, he demonstrates that much of his work time is taken up by legal minutiae. Our hero plows through vast amounts of paperwork, turns every possible waking moment into six minute billing increments, spends some quality time dueling with fellow lawyers in court, and strives to stay one step ahead of micromanaging bosses. But once he leaves the office, it's time to party with his posse. And our boy certainly doesn't hold back in that regard.

Despite a cynical sense of humor and a gift for vivid descriptions that keeps things light, the author's constant detours into graphic episodes of debauchery become wearisome and alienating. How in the world does he get away with constantly showing up to work hung over, not to mention arguing a case while riding high on a narcotic? And his sensual escapades? Well, I've read lighter stuff in Penthouse Forum, so you've been warned. But even in the midst of all this carnality, I ultimately found myself sympathizing with him. He exemplifies the American nightmare of choosing the wrong career right off the bat and then spending years dulling the pain with fleshly and chemical excess until his true calling is revealed.

I try to discover common ground with memoir authors, and I found some similarities with the Philadelphia Lawyer in our love for writing, shared occupational burnout, and a requirement for sit-down privacy in public bathrooms. But I empathized most with his quest for significance and self-expression, which held my attention and kept me reading. By the time his tenth year as a lawyer rolled around, writing had become his main focus. His popular anonymous blog eventually led to a deal for this book - the open-door that he'd been striving for. Once he had a publishing contract and advance check in hand, he resigned from his firm and left law for good. I wish him the best of luck.

Despite an overload of sensuality and substance abuse, "Happy Hour" is a good example of the "I hated my profession and quit when I found my passion" genre. I also recommend "Do Travel Writers Go To Hell," by Thomas Kohnstamm, "Waiter Rant" by The Waiter, and "A Town Like Paris" by Bryce Corbett as further literary examples of guys who loathed their jobs and found fulfillment within the craft of writing.
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11 of 13 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars If Hunter S. Thompson had gone to law school, August 8, 2008
By 
Brian A. Schar (Menlo Park, CA United States) - See all my reviews
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"Happy Hour is for Amateurs" is written in a style that will not be unfamiliar to those who have read "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas." This book is hardly a knockoff of "F&L", but the voice is similar. Your reaction to this book will likely be similar to your reaction to "F&L."

The author takes us through booze, drug and sex filled escapades during and after law school, as he comes to a realization of the nature of the career he has chosen. I doubt that most of that stuff actually happened - the author would have been dead 10 years ago. But it's a stylized over-the-top rendition of the type of things that go on in law school and in law firms.

I was an associate at a big firm for a while, and while I didn't hate the experience nearly as much as the author did his, there's a reason I'm not in private practice anymore. Among the raunchy hijinks, there are more than a few nuggets of truth about the practice of law.

I'm not sure if this book has wide appeal to general readers, but lawyers will likely find it interesting. "Happy Hour is for Amateurs" also should be required reading for people considering law school; although it's not a completely realistic snapshot of practice, it will give potential lawyers some idea of what they might be in for, and some idea of what questions to ask before they enter the profession.
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10 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A career in law, no thanks, October 5, 2008
From the time I was a kid my parents said law might be a good career choice for me. I wanted to be a professional soccer player at the time, but you might as well have a backup plan. Naturally it seemed like a good choice because I loved to argue. And why not, I was good at it. It wasn't until I was a little bit older when I looked around at my friend's parents who were lawyers, former lawyers-turned-professors, and realized that not many of them enjoyed the job. And if they didn't, how would I?

Happy Hour Is For Amateurs gives a great account of exactly what is wrong with the profession. Philadelphia Lawyer explains exactly the type of people that you will meet on your journey through "the world's worst profession." Billable hours, awful partners, golden handcuffs. The writer takes you on a journey with his life as the guide.

Where Philadelphia Lawyer truly shines in this book though is in his absolutely astute observational ability. He picks up on societal cues, work culture, nuances, and interesting subtleties about everyday life. And when you sit down and think about it you realize how right Philadelphia Lawyer is. He sees the world with a focused lens for deconstruction and explanation.

Whether the writer is talking about life in college, the terrible age of 26, or working in that career you loathe going to, his assertions are always clever and correct. An amazing gift in my opinion.

Ten years is a long time in a career as soul-breaking as law, but if there is one thing Philadelphia Lawyer cemented in my mind. It is that I am truly glad I did not take the gentle advice of my parents and start a career in law. If this book is an indicator of what might happen to a person trapped, I wonder what would have happened to me?
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Lots of sex and drugs, not so much law, August 7, 2008
By 
Monica J. Kern (Lexington, KY United States) - See all my reviews
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"Happy hour is for Amateurs" is an anonymous memoir written by the author of the wildly successful "Philadelphia Lawyer" blog. While it was cleverly written and quite funny, my sense after reading this book is that it is unlikely to improve the image of the legal profession or its practitioners. Much of the book is devoted to descriptions of the author's binge-drinking episodes and encounters with illegal drugs of all varieties, with a hefty dose of explicit sex (of all varieties) thrown in the mix. Many of these episodes entailed genuinely funny adventures, but if you're not sympathetic to, or interested in reading about, risky behavior you probably won't enjoy this book.

I read this book because law was high up on my list of possible career choices, so I was curious to see what life as a lawyer is really like. And the parts of the book I enjoyed the most were the author's criticisms of the profession. For example, his comments on his stint as a personal injury lawyer resonated strongly with me: "...sometimes defendants are liable, but in my experience, having worked both sides of the debate, most of them aren't. The plaintiff's been damaged as a result of some freak set of circumstances, and there's a good argument to be made that the defendant's only sin is being in the wrong place at the wrong time and having money or an insurance policy a personal injury lawyer can tap into for a settlement." This is the kind of insight I wish the author had devoted more time to developing, rather than yet another anecdote about yet another time he argued a motion under the influence of psychoactive drugs.

Although the focus on excess got tedious for me, I do admire the author's writing style. He has an edgy wit, and the book was full of delightful comments that made me laugh out loud, such as his statement that in real life, "the abstract hyperanalyis they drag you through in law school is as useful as a condom machine at an Indigo Girls concert." However, in coming up with a rating for the book I was stumped. A person who enjoys reading about sex and drugs would easily rate it a 5 on the basis of the quality of the writing and the book's entertainment value. A more conservative person wouldn't make it past the first anal sex description on p. 14 and rate it a 1. I guess I'll take the average and give a 3.
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9 of 11 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Reading that deserves to be billed hourly, October 2, 2008
Happy Hour Is for Amateurs conveys a friend-to-friend type of honesty that is rarely exposed in the professional world, without having to buy the drinks. Blindly diving into a profession that seemed good in theory, PhilaLawyer begins to notice that a paycheck fails to rationalize the tedious and mind numbing work. To get away from a career path that repels his zest for discovery and recklessness, PhilaLawyer undergoes countless daring and exciting adventures in attempts to escape the boredom and exhaustion. Progressing towards a goal that is often uncertain, motivated by anything that drowns out the work, many life affirming lessons and self-discoveries are weaved into the page-turning stories.

PhilaLawyer has a unique ability to methodically deconstruct and observe obscure situations in a way that make the book a true pleasure to read. From cover to cover the book progresses nicely and never looses its appeal. Balancing stories of debauchery and legal insight, sometimes both, the book offers a glimpse into the life of a very interesting man who is as much a lawyer as he is an inebriate and modern philosopher. PhilaLawyer understands things all too well; trapped a world where he must maintain a split personality to fuel his better half.
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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious Binge, Great Nightcap, September 6, 2008
The cover says it all. A Blackberry soaked in liquor. Anyone working around bosses and staying out all night to forget how much he hates his job is going to love this. It's a huge cartoon making fun of everything about legal culture, most of which can be applied to any office setting.

We're introduced to a lawyer who looks and acts like everybody in the office while he secretly can't stand them. Sound familiar? He careens through ten years in the career in and haze of lurid acts and perverted escapes described in hysterical, grotesque detail. The early parts are like really dark versions of Animal House or Old School. If you had a good time in college or grad school those chapters will hit home.

When the book goes into the lawyer's work life it turns into a more pointed version of Office Space. The lawyer never tries to be cute or ask for the reader's sympathy and he never picks a side. The deadhead who sells him mushrooms is as big a joke and source of derision as his boss. Faced with one bad job or situation after another the lawyer shrugs and says "caveat emptor." Introspection is minimal. The stories do the talking.

The lawyer is a bit of an idiot and he admits it. I couldn't help pulling for him as the book runs to its end. The biggest concern I had was that as he aged the bite of the humor would decrease. It got edgier and pushed on to a fantastic end. The ideal nightcap after a hilarious binge.
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12 of 16 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Sex and Drugs and Blog and Book Deal Bankroll, August 7, 2008
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இ Fuzzy Wuzzy's Summary:
ѾѾѾѾ Recommended with warm fuzzies.

If this book were ever made into a movie, and Ian Dury & The Blockheads were still around to sing an adapted version of his "Sex and Drugs and Rock and Roll" song as the movie's soundtrack, it would go something like:

Sex and drugs and blog and book deal bankroll
Is all my brain and body need
Sex and drugs and blog and book deal bankroll
Are very good indeed
Keep your silly civil law ways or throw them out the window
The wisdom of your personal injury laws, I've been there and I know
Lots of other ways to bill clients, what a jolly bad show
If all you ever do is law business you don't like
Sex and drugs and blog and book deal bankroll ...

This book is the consolidated version of the author's Web site blog writings and recounts his drug-addled trip (literally and figuratively) through college and law practice, and his testosterone-fueled conquests of women. As such, the writing reads like a blog-ish collection of individual anecdotes, without the flow of a biography or having the pacing of a timeline-based memoir during his years in law school and later as a client-bill-o-matic trained to stack up the hours.

The author and book remind me of a combination of the drug-induced haze of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream , Charles Bukowski's crude, insulting, macho women-conquesting character Henry Chinaski in Women: A Novel , as well as a whole litany of "men behaving badly" movie characters: Jeff Lebowski in The Big Lebowski (Widescreen Collector's Edition) , Jeff Spicoli in Fast Times at Ridgemont High (Widescreen Special Edition) , the struggling washed-up actor, Jack, in Sideways (Widescreen Edition) , Cheech&Chong movies like Cheech and Chong's Up In Smoke (High-Larious Edition) , etc.

What you ultimately think of this book may be influenced by: 1) what your initial expectations were of the book, 2) whether you found the constant references to drug use and both successful and unsuccessful sexual escapades with women funny, offensive, or repetitively boring, and, 3) especially for female readers, whether you are easily offended by the frequent sexual objectification of women (although I would not call him a misogynist, there is plenty of "men's locker room" language and crude bathroom graffiti humor being thrown about here).

My initial expectations of the book were an expose of sorts on the law profession as seen through the eyes of a lawyer. Obviously, with a sub-title like "A Lost Decade In the World's Worst Profession", I did not expect this to be the memoirs of a happy lawyer who felt that he was making the world a better place by practicing his trade.

On the cover of the book, Tucker Max, who wrote a funnier and more outrageous book and who helped the author set up his PhilaLawyer.net Web site blog, is quoted: "I was fired from my first legal job within a month, and this book explains why it was the best thing to ever happen to me", and the book's back cover describes it as a "hallucinogenic send-up of the legal profession ... this is his outrageous, juvenile, raucous, and entertaining story". The book was indeed "juvenile", "raucous", and "entertaining", but I did not really consider it "outrageous". Not being a lawyer myself, I was still not the least bit surprised when I read his description of his law office holding meetings on how to maximize the billing of hours to clients; in many ways, that is no different than salespeople having sales quotas and some police departments around the world having explicit or implied traffic ticket quotas.

The descriptions of the bar-hopping and bed-hopping and the rampant use of alcohol, drugs, hallucinogens, and nitrous oxide happen in many work environments. When you lose yourself frequently to mind-altering chemicals, a book could also be written called "A Lost Decade In The Accounting Department", "A Lost Decade Behind The Fast Food Counter", "A Lost Decade Of Drunk And Stoned Bullfighting In Spain", or "A Lost Decade In The World's Oldest Profession". I know a guy who works in a bicycle shop surrounded by stoners, and when I was in college, I drove a university shuttle bus alongside other bus drivers who smoked joints during their 15-minute pit stop breaks. Nearly every profession has its share of insanity that defies logic; that is what makes the humor in Dilbert and the "Office Space" movie resonate so well with everyone. And I have known many burnt and burned-out workers, including a lawyer who became a sculptor artist, a nurse who became a teacher, a chemical engineer who became a farmer, and a software engineer who became a paramedic.

But I was hoping for more anecdotes on the author's experiences with the legal profession mixed in with all of his experiences with drugs and women, and thus the 4-star rating.

An entire chapter spent recounting the time when his wife, with small breast implants, went car-surfing, fell from a tree, and got groped, fondled, and kissed by another woman was hilarious. But it represents the voyeuristic peep-show feeling that the entire book has, and it has a (probably intentional) non-blaming and non-accusatory tone to it. The author is not out to burn bridges or muckrake, and I found nothing really scathing in his comments about the profession (certainly no worse than already-publicized scandals about lawyers, politicians, teachers, etc). This is not a heavy-handed treatment of a subject matter, but just his admittedly subjective opinion of how he did not fit in with the system. After I finished reading this book, I just happened to put it on my bookshelf right next to Jeannette Walls' The Glass Castle: A Memoir book, thought momentarily about the surreal absurdity that was in both books, and noticed that unlike Jeannette whose childhood destiny was guided by some nutty parents, this author chose to get high, chose to try out criminal law, and then chose to try civil law and personal injury law before realizing that it was not his cup of tea. We all have had our share of making false starts and wrong turns in life.
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Happy Hour Is for Amateurs
Happy Hour Is for Amateurs by Philadelphia Lawyer
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