"Emphasises that the problem is not conflict and hurt, which are inevitable parts of living, but rather that the way these young women interpret and learn from their experiences is crucial."--"Times Higher Education"
"Finally! A nuanced look at hookup culture. This hookup book is not like the others."--"Salon"
"[Bell] hoped to find that young women would have dynamic, confident sex lives . . . but found a much more complex, difficult, dare we say Lena Dunham-esque situation instead."--"San Francisco Magazine"
"Bell hopes to dislodge embedded stereotypes of men as subject and women as object and defuse the fear that our sexuality is dangerous. Her book just might help that happen."--"Bust"
"Eerily close to the contradictory feelings you've personally had on the subject, but haven't been able to express."--Anna Breslaw"Cosmopolitan" (10/28/2013)
"["Hard to Get"] will resonate with many, and . . . will intrigue sociologists in this field."--J. M. Irvine"CHOICE" (09/01/2013)
"Timely. . . . Bell provides a nuanced examination of the conflicts 20-something women have in navigating the issues of their professional life versus their personal life."--Carolee A. Kallmann"Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy" (07/23/2013)
"An accessable and provocative text for encouraging conversation on the psychological consequences of persistent gender inequalities in this so-called post-feminist era."--Catherine Connell"Contemporary Sociology" (11/01/2014)
From the Inside Flap
"Women should be assertive but not aggressive, feminine but not passive, honest but not overwhelming. But how? Especially for women between ages 17 (the average age for first sex) and 27 (the average age of marriage) the rules for how to be a woman are highly unclear. In this deeply wise, very lucid, and highly illuminating book Bell, a sociologist and psychotherapist, describes how women sometimes split” their desires for connection, sex and professional success. And she points to ways of moving beyond the split. An important book for women and men."Arlie Hochschild, Author of The Outsourced Self: Intimate Life in Market Times
Leslie Bell introduces us to a new developmental period for 20 something women in which they are focused on sexual and relationship satisfaction. By sharing these women's stories Bell helps us to explore complex issues of ambivalence, subjectivity, and identity that are at the core of personal, relational and sexual fulfillment.”C.J. Pascoe, author of Dude, You’re a Fag: Masculinity and Sexuality in High School
While popular portrayals of women and sex are glossy, voyeuristic, simplified, unemotional, or trite, Hard to Get offers rarely heard detailed stories that are told with emotional resonance and connection to women’s full lives and selves. Bell has made a superb contribution to our understanding about how women navigate sexuality in young adulthood in an era when they no longer must be married, and thus she has enlightened our understanding of women’s social, sexual, and psychological lives.”Karin A. Martin, author of Puberty, Sexuality, and the Self: Boys and Girls at Adolescence
"Hard to Get shows us why, in the 21st Century, sex is easy but relationships are not. Every 20something woman who is having sex, but feels that something is amiss, should read this book."Meg Jay, Ph.D., author of The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter and How to Make the Most of Them Now
"Can today’s young women be independent and sexually agentic while also satisfying their relational needs for intimacy? Bell believes that they can, and insightfully uses women’s stories to reveal the inner and outer barriers to having it all."Paula England, New York University
Bell offers a profoundly original and important argument about why despite gains in education and employment -- young women in America continue to be short-changed in sex and intimacy. And she gives us a new, compelling vision of what it would mean for them to attain true sexual liberation.”Amy Schalet, author of Not Under My Roof: Parents, Teens, and the Culture of Sex
Female sexuality provides endless fascination; but how do actual young women find happiness in sex and love? Leslie Bell gives us an up-close look at twenty-something women at a cultural moment when they have more freedom than ever before, but their desires sexual and relational continue to confound. Bell navigates this complex terrain with compassion, keen insight, and an eye to social change.”Daphne de Marneffe, PhD, author of Maternal Desire: On Children, Love, and the Inner Life