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I Hate Everyone...Starting with Me Deluxe [Kindle Edition with Audio/Video]

Joan Rivers
3.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (384 customer reviews)

Print List Price: $16.00
Kindle Price: $9.49
You Save: $6.51 (41%)
Sold by: Penguin Group (USA) LLC

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Kindle Edition with Audio/Video, June 5, 2012 $9.49  
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Book Description


Watch Joan hate even more things – including her books, her publisher, and even the person filming her – in all new, uncensored video in the Deluxe eBook edition. See Joan at her most outrageous!

“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.”
—Elizabeth Barrett Browning, 1850

“How do I hate thee? How much time do you have?”
—Joan Rivers, today, about two-ish

Joan Rivers is a groundbreaking, award-winning, internationally renowned entertainment goddess. She’s also opinionated—especially when it comes to people she hates. Like people who think giving birth is a unique achievement. Or well-adjusted, a.k.a. boring, ex-child stars who don’t even have a decent addiction.
With all of her diverse experiences, it stands to reason that Joan has seen, done, said, and heard a lot of hateful things. Thank god, she took notes.

Here—uncensored and totally uninhibited—she give the best of her worst to First Ladies, closet cases, hypocrites, Hollywood, feminists, and overrated historical figures. And even when letting herself have it, Joan doesn’t hold back in this honest, unabashedly hilarious love letter to the hater in all of us.

Includes new material!

Editorial Reviews


“…more punch lines per paragraph than any book I’ve read in years.” —The New York Times

"She holds nothing back." —The Washington Post

“Often hilarious, often shocking, totally politically incorrect.”—Liz Smith

“An entertaining rant…The only thing missing is the sound of a drumroll and cymbals to feel as though one is sitting in a nightclub watching a live comedy marathon…A raucous, biting look at life.”—Kirkus Reviews

“Nobody, but nobody, can hate like Joan Rivers. It is a gift. It is also shocking, the things she makes us laugh at…Joan Rivers is extraordinary, but she's not for the easily offended—or for anyone who gets offended at all. ”—People


“An encyclopedia of kvetches by Joan Rivers, with more punch lines per paragraph than any book I’ve read in years.”—The New York Times
“Often hilarious, often shocking, totally politically incorrect.”—Liz Smith, The Huffington Post (I think if this content was exclusive to huffpo we should mention them; if it’s syndicated we can just use her name if you prefer.)
“An entertaining rant on how she hates nearly everything and everyone, especially herself….The only thing missing is the sound of a drum roll and cymbals to feel as though one is sitting in a nightclub watching a live comedy marathon.”—Kirkus Reviews
"Joan Rivers is extraordinary, but she's not for the easily offended-or for anyone who gets offended at all.”--People

Product Details

  • File Size: 172112 KB
  • Print Length: 271 pages
  • Page Numbers Source ISBN: 0425255891
  • Publisher: Berkley (June 5, 2012)
  • Sold by: Penguin Group (USA) LLC
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B007ZHC5UO
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #228,200 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
143 of 154 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars An AWFUL little book, but I can't help myself June 5, 2012
This is an AWFUL little book that is so offensive I ought to throw it right out the window...but I can't, because I can't stop laughing. Just the line about why chocolate doesn't count as decadent had me...well, I don't want this review to be censored, so I'll stop. Just read the book and you'll see what I mean!

Four stars instead of five because I'm afraid giving it five will get me sent straight to hell when I die. You understand, don't you, Joan?
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63 of 67 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Only thing missing is the rim shot! June 6, 2012
By Chaya
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
This isn't so much a book as a series of one liners from one of the funniest stand-up comedians ever. I've loved Joan River's humor since her early appearances on Johnny Carson, and this book reads like vintage Joan! I laughed so hard, I scared the cat out of bed and usually the only thing that can do that is a needed trip to the litter box or (if I'm lucky) coughing up a hair ball.

Nothing is sacred, everything is a target for her quick wit. If you are easily offended, skip this book. If you like old-fashioned stand-up, click that "buy" button now - it's like a trip back to the Borscht Belt.
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79 of 87 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars "A Book Only Joan Can Write" June 6, 2012
You have to give Joan Rivers credit for coming up with a smart and intelligent title to her latest book" I Hate Everyone...Starting With Me". The content is pretty simple...Joan hates everything and everyone and is not shy when it comes to writing about it. Everyone from the sappy weather man to people having babies to movie stars and holy rollers, Joan says it like no one else can. The book is simply a hilarious take on today's pop culture and is written as a funny, yet, perverse appoach, on what is wrong with the world.

I cannot think of any other entertainer who would have the guts to write this, but Joan Rivers does and I applaud her for it. Believe me you will not sit down with this book and say, "boring", because nothing Joan does or writes about is boring. The subtext to this book is to let your feelings out and don't repress them. Once you express your opinions you will feel better and happy, even if those opinions may not please most people, but do you think Joan really cares what others think?

Ahhhhhh, if I could be more like my Joan.

A++. One of the funniest books I have read!
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28 of 30 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I laughed so hard it made me hate all other books June 6, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I am writing this review and am not even done with the book yet but it's so damn funny and great I had to encourage all fans and non-fans of Joan to read this.
I bought this yesterday and started reading last night. It is so damn funny that I couldn't stop reading and read more than half of it in one sitting. If you are a Joan fan you have to buy this. I could hear her voice in my head while reading and was laughing so hard that I had to take moments to compose myself and stop my tears before reading more. Hoping to finish it today. If you are remotely snarky you'll love every page and relate to all the things Joan hates.
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43 of 51 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The Queen of One-Liners Delivers June 6, 2012
By Lin
I purchased this book yesterday and read it in two sittings the same day. I absolutely love it. As a self-described cynic and Joan Ranger, I expected nothing but the most brutal comedy from her and she graciously delivered it. I have a deep respect and admiration for comedians who can laugh at themselves, which Joan does throughout the book (in between insulting every celebrity in Hollywood). Her plastic surgery jokes are as funny as ever, and she gives us hysterical one-liners throughout the entire text.

The chapters categorize different targets of her hatred, including old people, death, world locations, children and table manners. The chapters dealing with children and the elderly had me laughing especially hard, because once you've worked in retail for a year and a half like I have, you come to appreciate her brutal honesty. Joan is unashamed to express her displeasure with graphic language (which will indeed offend the faint of heart, so take heed), and I appreciate such words as the flavors of conversation. The shorter chapters made this book an easy read, not because of simple content, but because I never once found myself bored with it. This book is styled very similarly to Joan's comedy routines: before you've had time to catch your breath from laughing at one joke, she's given you three more things to laugh at.

As I've said, this book is not for the faint of heart, nor is it for the over-sensitive readers out there. Joan says herself in the introduction that this piece of literature is not to be taken literally, but if you know that you're one who is easily bothered by off-color jokes, I wouldn't recommend it. For those who love wit, one-liners, and shocking humor, this book is a comedy gem.
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30 of 35 people found the following review helpful
Format:Kindle Edition
To be honest, I wasn't going to really read this book. I'm not a JoanRanger or fan however you call it, but I do love fashion police and watch it every once in a while. I decided to buy this book because on the release date it just popped up on my Nook latest books, so I gave it a try. Started reading it at midnight, and no matter how tired I was I COULDN'T PUT THIS BOOK DOWN! IT WAS SOOOO HILARIOUS I WOKE MY HUSBAND UP JUST BY LAUGHING. I mean, I've had my good laughs, my tears and my moments with other books, but with THIS ONE IT WAS DIFFERENT: I CRIED MY EYES OUT LAUGHING. Of course my jaw dropped a couple of times because it gets very "JoanJokes" if you know what I mean.

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Most Recent Customer Reviews
1.0 out of 5 stars One Star
I did'nt really care for it. She was a little too vulgar and disrespectful for my taste.
Published 9 hours ago by Marian Fultz
4.0 out of 5 stars Funny woman makes $150 million in one lifetime..
This woman was what my dad would call in the old days, ''a dame''. My wife loved her and always laughed when she watched Fashion Police. I sat down one night and read this book. Read more
Published 17 hours ago by Gent
2.0 out of 5 stars Without Joan delivering the punch lines this book is a sad commentary...
Joan Rivers was an icon. She made so many people laugh including me. This book captures the written words behind the spoken. Read more
Published 20 hours ago by CherieB
5.0 out of 5 stars One of the best books I've read!
OMG laughs on every page. Totally irreverent as only Joan Rivers could be and I would recommend this to everyone that likes to laugh!
Published 22 hours ago by Jackie Jeffery
4.0 out of 5 stars classic Joan Rivers. I can close my eyes and ...
classic Joan Rivers. I can close my eyes and hear her on Fashion Police. Oh,Oh ! Where did she get that gown?
Published 1 day ago by charles wilson
5.0 out of 5 stars Joan loved life.
Loved it! Brutal honesty about life and relationships.
Published 1 day ago by madzia
5.0 out of 5 stars Love Joan and miss her
Love Joan and miss her ,I'm very happy to still be able to get her books and try to start reading again
Published 3 days ago by Patricia Ann Saporito-Murdock
1.0 out of 5 stars So sad she's gone😕
So very funny.
Published 4 days ago by Linda S. Kassel
3.0 out of 5 stars Three Stars
I love Joan, but some of these were a little too much
Published 5 days ago by elaine sdao
5.0 out of 5 stars Wonderfully funny, but hard to read after her death
Wonderfully funny, but hard to read after her death. Bad timing on my part. She will definitely be missed; her wit and humor were like no other, that is for sure.
Published 6 days ago by smy
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