Hate Hurts: How Children Learn And Unlearn Prejudice [Paperback]

Anti-Defamation League (Author), Caryl Stern-LaRosa (Author), Ellen Hofheimer Bettmann (Author)

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Noticing differences among people is biological. At six months, an infant can distinguish skin color, hair texture, and facial features. But forming attitudes about differences is social, say Caryl Stern La Rosa and Ellen Hofheimer Bettman in this perceptive and practical book developed by the Anti-Defamation League, Hate Hurts. The authors offer a clear and compelling guide to understanding the way children learn and unlearn prejudice, suggesting hundreds of strategies, role plays, and sample dialogues for parents and teachers to shape the way children value the differences they perceive.

Prejudice--an all-too-common response to dealing with differences of race, religion, ethnicity, or sexual orientation--is contagious, the authors warn. They offer both the theory and the practice to teach children to "turn the fear and pain of prejudice into the courage and cooperation of understanding and respect." Insightful chapters illuminate how children see differences at various ages, from toddler to teen, and detail the tough questions they may ask.

The most powerful segments of the book are devoted to true stories that describe how to respond to children of all ages who have been the initiator or the object of hateful words and actions. For example, one section redefines "big words" (prejudice, stereotype, and discrimination) for "little people"; another tackles adolescent name-calling, exclusion, and "zooing." Specific tools for countering bias in schools, media, books, and online are underlined with conviction and clarity. Parents and teachers could not wish for a wiser guide to confront and conquer prejudice in our children and ourselves. --Barbara Mackoff

Product Details

• Reading level: Ages 9 and up
  
• Paperback: 352 pages
• Publisher: Scholastic Paperbacks; 1st edition (September 1, 2000)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0439211212
• ISBN-13: 978-0439211215
• Product Dimensions: 8 x 5.3 x 1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 14.4 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #380,005 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

16 of 19 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Wonderful Text For Concerned Parents, October 15, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Hate Hurts: How Children Learn And Unlearn Prejudice (Paperback)

A marvelous book! As the mother of young twins, I wonder (and worry) about how best to teach my children what it means to be a citizen in a diverse society, one where people of different races, religions, nationalities, ethnicites, ages, sexual orientations, looks and customs all participate equally (whew, that was a lot for one sentence!) -- but where, alas, a good deal of prejudice and misunderstanding still exist. 'Hate Hurts' is full of fine, useful advice. The authors offer insights and suggestions that are always practical, though not always obvious. What's more, part of the proceeds go towards efforts by the Anti-Defamation League to eradicate prejudice. This book will have a permanent and prominent place in our family library.

15 of 18 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars a lesson to "unlearn", November 17, 2000

By 

Benjamin K. Potter "loyal reader/writer" (Memphis, TN) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Hate Hurts: How Children Learn And Unlearn Prejudice (Paperback)

I had to read this book at work (I'm an assistant editor for a teachers' magazine) and was pleasantly surprised at the outcome of my reading assignment. If you are a parent or teacher, you will have no trouble finding some benefit from this book.

"Hate Hurts" addresses issues that different ages of children have, from a preschooler's inquiries ("Why don't that man's legs work?") to more serious teen-age deliberations ("I don't like how my friends were teasing that gay guy, but I don't want them to think I'm gay...").

The only reason I don't give this 5 stars is the scattershot approach the book takes. Having said that, this approach makes the book digestible by parents and teachers alike, and the material is appropriate for sharing with nearly anybody. This book is an easy read, and has many applicable anecdotes and a great lesson for all.