Taking a brass tacks approach to communication, How to Have Confidence and Power in Dealing With People explains how to interact with others as they really are, not as you would like them to be. The goal is to get what you want from them successfully – be it cooperation, goodwill, love or security. Les Giblin, a recognized expert in the field of human relations, has devised a method for dealing with people that can be used when relating with anyone – parents, teachers, bosses, employees, friends, acquaintances, even strangers. Giblin shows step by step how to get what you want at any time and in ways that leave you feeling good about yourself. Moreover, the people who have given you want you want wind up feeling good about themselves, too. The result? Nobody gets shortchanged. It’s a win-win situation. Each chapter includes a handy summary, so there’s absolutely no chance of missing the book’s key points. You can also use these recaps to refresh your memory after you’ve finished the book. Instead of feeling miserable about your interpersonal skills, read this best-selling guide and learn to succeed with people in every area of your life.
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115 of 119 people found the following review helpful
By ServantofGod
Format:Hardcover
Not after I finished it and started to write the review I didnt realize this book was first published in 1956. That means two things. First, human nature doest change. Second, it's so good that it can stand the test of time and become a classic.
As there is no content page here on Amazon, I would like to post one here for your reference.
Ch1. Your key to success and happiness
Ch2. How to use the basic secret for inluencing others
Ch3. How to cash in on your hidden assets
Ch4. How to control the actions and attitudes of others
Ch5. How you can create a good impression on others
Ch6. How to use three big secrets for attracting people
Ch7. How to make the other person feel friendly
Ch8. How you can develop skill in using words
Ch9. How to use the technique that a supreme court justice called "White Magic"
Ch10. How to get others to see things your way quickly
Ch11. How to get 100% cooperation and increae your brain power
Ch12. How to use your miracle power in human relations
Ch13. How to criticize others without offending them
Ch14. A simple, effective plan of action that will bring you success and happiness
Certainly the chapters above seem common in many interpersonal relationship books. However, I am obliged to praise the author for his outstanding writing skill, clever use of short stories to elaborate the rationale behind his many useful tactics, and those helpful summaries in the end of each chapter. Even if you are a frequent self help book reader, it will still satisfy you well with the no nonsense points. In short, highly recommended!
p.s. Below please some of my favorite passages for your reference.
J.C. Staehle, after analyzing many surveye, found that the prinicpal causes of unrest among workers were the following, listed in the order of their importance:-
1. Failure to give credit for suggestions
2. Failure to correct grievances
3. Failure to encourage
4. Criticizing employees in front of other people
5. Failure to ask employees of their opinion
6. Failure to inform employees of their progress
7. Favoritism pg 24
Remember, human beings are innately selfish beings. They are first, last and always interested in themselves, in their job, their family, their home town, their ideas. Even a question like, "Where are you from?" shos that you are interested in the other person, and consequently gets him interested in you. pg 89
Use "Happy Talk" as much as possible. Nobody likes a Gloomy Gus. Nobody likes to sit and listen to a prophet of doom. People dont like to hear bad news. pg 91
When a would be policitician asked Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes for advice on how to get elected to office, Justice Holmes wrote him: To be able to listen to others in a sympathetic and understanding manner is perhaps the most effective mechanism in the world for getting along with people and tying up their friendship for good. Too few people practice the "white magic" of being good listeners. pg 94
Most of us want the other fellow to think we are clever, intelligent, "smart". But the person who goes around always making "smart remarks", always knocking himself out to be "clever," is not voted in by the other fellow as a "clever person". Instead he gets elected to the classification of "smart-aleck," "blow-hard", or "egotist." pg 95
These three Yale psychologists found the best way to get ideas accepted is to use a low-pressure technique, one of calmly presenting facts, and leaving out threats or attempts at using force. pg 106
Two rules for administering praise. 1. It must be sincere. 2. Praise the act or the attribute, rather than the person. pg 135
Knowledge + Application = Success pg 147
As there is no content page here on Amazon, I would like to post one here for your reference.
Ch1. Your key to success and happiness
Ch2. How to use the basic secret for inluencing others
Ch3. How to cash in on your hidden assets
Ch4. How to control the actions and attitudes of others
Ch5. How you can create a good impression on others
Ch6. How to use three big secrets for attracting people
Ch7. How to make the other person feel friendly
Ch8. How you can develop skill in using words
Ch9. How to use the technique that a supreme court justice called "White Magic"
Ch10. How to get others to see things your way quickly
Ch11. How to get 100% cooperation and increae your brain power
Ch12. How to use your miracle power in human relations
Ch13. How to criticize others without offending them
Ch14. A simple, effective plan of action that will bring you success and happiness
Certainly the chapters above seem common in many interpersonal relationship books. However, I am obliged to praise the author for his outstanding writing skill, clever use of short stories to elaborate the rationale behind his many useful tactics, and those helpful summaries in the end of each chapter. Even if you are a frequent self help book reader, it will still satisfy you well with the no nonsense points. In short, highly recommended!
p.s. Below please some of my favorite passages for your reference.
J.C. Staehle, after analyzing many surveye, found that the prinicpal causes of unrest among workers were the following, listed in the order of their importance:-
1. Failure to give credit for suggestions
2. Failure to correct grievances
3. Failure to encourage
4. Criticizing employees in front of other people
5. Failure to ask employees of their opinion
6. Failure to inform employees of their progress
7. Favoritism pg 24
Remember, human beings are innately selfish beings. They are first, last and always interested in themselves, in their job, their family, their home town, their ideas. Even a question like, "Where are you from?" shos that you are interested in the other person, and consequently gets him interested in you. pg 89
Use "Happy Talk" as much as possible. Nobody likes a Gloomy Gus. Nobody likes to sit and listen to a prophet of doom. People dont like to hear bad news. pg 91
When a would be policitician asked Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes for advice on how to get elected to office, Justice Holmes wrote him: To be able to listen to others in a sympathetic and understanding manner is perhaps the most effective mechanism in the world for getting along with people and tying up their friendship for good. Too few people practice the "white magic" of being good listeners. pg 94
Most of us want the other fellow to think we are clever, intelligent, "smart". But the person who goes around always making "smart remarks", always knocking himself out to be "clever," is not voted in by the other fellow as a "clever person". Instead he gets elected to the classification of "smart-aleck," "blow-hard", or "egotist." pg 95
These three Yale psychologists found the best way to get ideas accepted is to use a low-pressure technique, one of calmly presenting facts, and leaving out threats or attempts at using force. pg 106
Two rules for administering praise. 1. It must be sincere. 2. Praise the act or the attribute, rather than the person. pg 135
Knowledge + Application = Success pg 147
51 of 52 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
I first heard about this great book back in the mid 1970's when I was working for a direct sales company. I had to admit that people skills were not my forte. The good news was that they could be devloped and I did just that by reading and using Les Giblins great techniques.
The technique how to get 100% cooperation alone is worth the price of this book. In fact, I feel that it would be impossible to read any part of this great book without benefitting.
This is a great book. Highly recommended.
The technique how to get 100% cooperation alone is worth the price of this book. In fact, I feel that it would be impossible to read any part of this great book without benefitting.
This is a great book. Highly recommended.
36 of 37 people found the following review helpful
By Deirdre
Format:Paperback
If you have trouble handling people, this is the book for you. Sure, it was written in the 1950s, but it does NOT need to be updated. Everything the author says is true; and he explains it all in an easy, understandable, and thoughtful way. One of my favorite parts is when Les Giblin tells a story about one of his friends who walked up to total strangers and chatted with them as if they were old friends. ("No one ever called him fresh or rude.") Giblin asked his friend what his secret was. His friend's secret is revealed; Buy this book, b/c it's worth it!
Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars
Fantastic book
I was looking for something amazing. Well, this book is amazing.
Old stuffs written in an instructive way. I am better now at communicating with others. Read more
Old stuffs written in an instructive way. I am better now at communicating with others. Read more
Published 22 days ago by Kansa
5.0 out of 5 stars
Gain Confidence
This is a straight talkin' book about how to get along with others. A classic, right up there with the Power of Positive Thinking!
Published 2 months ago by Grace Murphy-Jenkins
5.0 out of 5 stars
timeless advice
I found the advice about smiling simple but amazingly effective. Something I think all should take a moment to read.
Published 3 months ago by mijo
5.0 out of 5 stars
Very good self improvement book.......
Easy read. Offers great advise for improving your interpersonal skills. I have read numerous books written along these lines, and has a lot to offer someone looking to better their... Read more
Published 4 months ago by Bruce T. Akins
5.0 out of 5 stars
improve your life
This Book really changed my life. I am reading it for the second time because there is so much in it to improve your ability to have healthy relationships with all kinds of people. Read more
Published 4 months ago by Dennis Dawson
5.0 out of 5 stars
NEWTOWN might not of happen if they read Les Giblin's Book!
What happen at Newtown, probably could happen in any town today, due to the use of Social Websites today on the internet. Social websites are International not local. Read more
Published 5 months ago by J. D. Laughead
5.0 out of 5 stars
Old is gold
I admire the wisdom of Les Giblin. I found this book extremely informative about the interpersonal skills and I can observe this in my life that people who piss others off is... Read more
Published 6 months ago by Sobia
4.0 out of 5 stars
Well done.
This book teaches social skills which although American, are quite applicable to other cultures (such as Canadian).
For example:
1. Read more
For example:
1. Read more
Published 7 months ago by Shinobi
5.0 out of 5 stars
A must have!
A must have for your library. Well written skilled hands on approach for dealing with people and getting to root cause of why we do what do. Read more
Published 8 months ago by Jspr86
5.0 out of 5 stars
Best Book I have Ever Read
This book is phenomenal. It is easy to read and straight to the point.It book provides practical ways to be a better over all person, especially when dealing with others. Read more
Published 8 months ago by J
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