The Healing Power of Anger: The Unexpected Path to Love and Fulfillment [Paperback]

John R. Rifkin (Author)

Book Description

ISBN-10: 1931044821 | ISBN-13: 978-1931044820 | Publication Date: November 1, 2004 | Edition: Special

Conventional wisdom views anger as red-hot yelling and screaming, a force to be feared and repressed. But psychotherapist John Rifkin views anger in a revolutionary way -- as the natural energy created to heal one's emotional injuries. In "The Healing Power of Anger," Rifkin explains how to identify dysfunctional uses of anger so that readers can "unbend" it and become empowered and self-nurturing. To do so, he explains his Stop, Drop, and Roll system, which he's used with clients for more than 20 years. In addition, Rifkin explores the childhood roots of anger, the spectrum of angry behavior, how anger can be a gift to a relationship, and ice-cold passive-aggressive anger.

Editorial Reviews

From the Inside Flap

"Dr. Rifkin has crafted a profound yet easy-to-understand roadmap of the key emotions that drive our lives. The book is a ‘must-read’ for people trapped in the whirlpool of anger, sadness, or fear. The take-home value is immediate." - Jim Warner, author of Aspirations of Greatness: Mapping the Midlife Leader’s Reconnection to Self and Soul

"John Rifkin, a gifted psychotherapist, tells us how we can lead happier lives not by stifling our anger but rather by using it constructively. In his straightforward, down-to-earth style, he shares with us easy-to-learn techniques for achieving greater emotional well-being." - Evelyn Bassoff, Ph.D., author of Mothers and Daughters: Loving and Letting Go

"This excellent book is full of pearls and good advice for people with common psychological problems. Dr. Rifkin’s extensive experience and wisdom shine through these pages." - Steven L. Dubovsky, M.D., professor and chair, Department of Psychiatry, University at Buffalo

About the Author

JOHN R. RIFKIN, Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist based in Boulder, Colorado, who lectures on a wide variety of mental health topics, including issues relating to anger, power, and intimacy. He is featured in a series of educational videos on mental health, including Anger’s Power to Heal: Relationships, and hosted the television show Emotional Success.

Product Details

• Paperback: 204 pages
• Publisher: Paraview Special Editions; Special edition (November 1, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1931044821
• ISBN-13: 978-1931044820
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 5.9 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (33 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #768,075 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Pathway to Emotional Health, February 22, 2006

By 

Rebecca Johnson "The Rebecca Review" (Washington State) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: The Healing Power of Anger: The Unexpected Path to Love and Fulfillment (Paperback)

"Most people associate anger with loud, scary, and bitter explosions. But I define anger as the natural healing energy that the body generates in response to an injury. This energy is meant to address or tend to the injury." ~John Rifkin

When I think of anger, two things come to mind. Being emotionally abused by someone who is angry and being angry enough to change the situation. In many cases, my own anger in return just makes situations worse, especially when maintaining the relationship and allowing the angry person to repeat the abuse.

Without peaceful consistency, I experience conflict and disorder as if what is occurring inside is represented on the outside in my environment. Leading a well-organized life where everyone is pleasant and kind seems a dream. That is why the title of this book is slightly more than intriguing. Normally one assumes that the path to peace is love and understanding. Anger lashes out and is hardly an appealing cozy hug.

John Rifkin sees anger as a path to a more fulfilled life. He explores the reasons we "develop holes in our heart" and then gives practical ways we can deal with our thoughts, feelings and behaviors. He delves into the emotional damage you may have experienced while a child and examines anxiety (PTSD), mood disorders, depression, bipolar disorder and ways we misuse our anger. Chapter Seven contains helpful information about resolving conflict in relationships and how to improve communication skills.

Is anger a wake up call? Could you be anxious and angry because you have made choices that are harming you? Does anger help you to break out of complacency and change your life? What are the seven categories of emotional damage from childhood? Category six started to sound very familiar.

John Rifkin discusses anger on the entire scale of expression, from angry red anger to passive-aggressive anger. He also explains why Emotional Intimacy is one of the most difficult things to accomplish. I liked his ideas about identifying low self-esteem and why anger often takes the form of self-destructive behaviors. He explains why individuals can seem to be emotionally unaware and why people who are depressed often find themselves in a downward spiral. Is there hope and what can be done about depression and anger?

"Anger plays a central role in major depression and in all depressive behavior. Therapists define depression as anger turned against the self, combined with a sense of hopelessness or helplessness." ~Chapter 5

If you are interested in anger and want to understand why you react or the basis for the reaction, then this is an excellent place to start. This book is very much about learning to communicate effectively so you can use milder feelings of anger to solve the problems in your life. John Rifkin has truly written a book to help us understand anger from a variety of perspectives. I actually started reading this book when I was quite angry and by the time I finished, I felt like finally someone understood! Highly recommended to anyone experiencing anger, conflict in relationships or a general feeling of frustration, anxiety or even deep depression. If you think you may be bipolar or know someone who experiences wide mood swings, this book can help you understand bipolar disorder.

This book would also be an excellent resource for social workers, psychologists and counselors. Throughout this book there are numerous case studies. The Healing Power of Anger addresses all the shades of anger and how it can lead to depression, addictions and on the flip side, could help you overcome both.

~The Rebecca Review

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars groundbreaking, February 7, 2005

By 

Kayla Powell (Pittsburgh, PA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Healing Power of Anger: The Unexpected Path to Love and Fulfillment (Paperback)

On its way to the bestsellers list. This is the most insightful, intelligent, and practical analysis of anger I have ever come across. John Rifkin is onto something. His Stop, Drop, and Roll technique will change your life. A must-read if you suffer from anxiety or depression. Beautifully written, well paced, logically organized, helpful metaphors, an easy read. Perhaps the only advice on anger to date that is of any use to anyone who seeks real and lasting change in their relationships.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Essential reading for just about anyone, July 22, 2006

By 

Joanna Daneman (Middletown, DE USA) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: The Healing Power of Anger: The Unexpected Path to Love and Fulfillment (Paperback)

Author John Rifkin is a licensed clinical psychologist, meaning he's got a Ph.D but also hands-on clinical experience. He's written this book based on 28 years of observation and work with patients who have a variety of psychological ailments. At the root of these, proposes Rifkin, is anger. Anger misguided leads to depression, violence, and addictive behavior.

The chapters on addictive behavior throw a new light on a well-trodden subject. Rifkin ties in angry behavior and emotion to a variety of addictions including substance abuse, and he does not fall into the trap of simplifying this difficult health problem. Even though addictive behavior has complex causes and manifestations, Rifkin boils it down to one essential sentence "Please love me!" These chapters are vital reading to anyone with a substance abuse problem, or to anyone who has a family member with this problem. Rifkin has a method called "stop, drop and roll" to handle cravings that come from various triggers and angry outburst.

There is a huge amount of ground covered in this book in just 200 pages. The writing is clear and the stories are real; this isn't theory--it's about people and who they are and what they do. You are certain to find some aspect of your own behavior here--perhaps that will be uncomfortable or enlightening. Either way, this is a very revealing book. Absolutely recommended reading for anyone.