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Healing Your Aloneness: Finding Love and Wholeness Through Your Inner Child Paperback – July 20, 1990


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Healing Your Aloneness: Finding Love and Wholeness Through Your Inner Child + Inner Bonding: Becoming a Loving Adult to Your Inner Child + Affirmations for the Inner Child
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 208 pages
  • Publisher: HarperOne; 1 edition (July 20, 1990)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0062501496
  • ISBN-13: 978-0062501493
  • Product Dimensions: 6.1 x 0.5 x 9.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (55 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #34,046 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

"A profound look at the cause of inner pain." SUSAN FORWARD, author of "Toxic Parents"

"This practical and powerful guide to inner healing will be especially useful to anyone at a crossroads, crisis, or change-point in their personal and spiritual growth." HAROLD H. BLOOMFIELD, author of "Making Peace With Your Parents"

"The authors have made an explicit and important break with other child within writers by emphasizing that it is not simply a healthy Inner Child for Inner Parent but a healthy relationship between the two that is the key to personal health.The work is practical, compelling, and very readable." JOHN VASCONCELLOS, California Assemblyman, 23rd District

"A valuable roadmap for healing the child within us." WALTER E. BRACKELMANNS, associate clinical professor of psychiatry, UCLA -- Endorsements

About the Author

Margaret Paul, Ph.D., is a psychotherapist and the coauthor of Free to Love, Do l Have to Give Up Me to Be Loved By You?, From Conflict to Caring, and If You Really Loved Me.

Customer Reviews

Very insightful and informative.
Amazon Customer
Your life will show you what you need to do, and you cannot rush or speed your way through the many recoveries you might need.
Paul Fucich
This books helps to better understand the fault line in growth.
Lenore Clift

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

108 of 114 people found the following review helpful By William G. Dallavo on November 4, 1999
Format: Paperback
Review
I read "Healing Your Aloneness" because my daughter asked me to. She felt it would help me understand the type of therapy she was involed in and give us a common language that might improve the quality of the communication between us. I am so very glad I followed my daughter's lead.
This book taught me the Inner Bonding process in such a beautiful way, with moving stories from the lives of some of the authors'clients. It helped me see that, in responding to my daughter's
wounded Inner Child, I was in "Intent to Protect" my ego instead of "Intent to Learn" about my daughter's pain.
I thought I was helping to heal the gap between us by the things I said to my daughter. But what I learned from the non-judgemental way the authors helped others understand how a "Loving Adult" relates to a wounded "Inner Child" showed me why she stayed distant.
Now, when my daughter talks about her wounded Inner Child, I have the awareness and the tools to let her know I hear her heart. We are not home yet, but the gap is closing. My daughter now knows that she can trust that I love her, that I will "hang in there" with the healing process and that, if she lets me know what her Inner Child needs, I will try my very best to provide it.
"Healing Your Aloneness" gave me another gift. It helped me get in touch with and listen to my own Inner Child. He is seven. His name is "Billy," He, too, has wounds that have not healed. He, too, is angry at me for not listening to him, for not being there. I am continuing to bond with him from my "Loving Adult." He is so bright,so wise, so needy, so capable of joy. I love that little boy and he too is beginning to trust that I do.
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55 of 60 people found the following review helpful By C. R. Griffin on March 2, 2005
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
All growth is really hard work. This is hard work. I would equate it to the transformation that The Incredible Hulk goes through. The thing is though, it isn't that fast. It takes time and dedication. I've read maybe 30 books and they all have their wisdoms and their truths, but it was this book that put me on the road I needed to be on. Somethings just resonate. This resonated with me, and when I started communicating with the abandoned and hurt child within me, I could for the first time see what had gone wrong and what I needed to do to fix it. I'm not completely there, but I have no doubt that I will.
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29 of 31 people found the following review helpful By Jenna Korf on December 6, 2007
Format: Paperback
I picked this book up a few years ago and immediately felt the change. It gave me tools to improve my self-esteem, while also showing me that I've been giving all my power to others. It helped me to realize I needed to look inward to find what I was always searching for. I still go back to this book when I need a reminder and it still hits me. The lessons I've learned from it have stayed with me over the years. This book has played a huge part in my growth process and I highly recommend it!
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25 of 27 people found the following review helpful By J. Manges on May 25, 2005
Format: Paperback
This is really one of the most profound books out there on Inner Child work. It is written in a concise, easy to read and follow manner. I bought it some time ago and recently was drawn back to reading it and this time the light bulb really went off and I really "got it." The authors do an excellent job in really making it very reader-friendly. My copy is now dog-eared and highlighted all through...it has helped me tremendously and continues to help me tremendously as an individual, and also as a counselor/therapist.
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29 of 35 people found the following review helpful By S. Czerwinski on February 26, 2006
Format: Paperback
Most of us have been raised by parents who did not realize the damage they did to us in our formative years.

This book allows us to see and repair that damage and therefore to treat ourselves as our parents should have treated us.

I recommend this book highly.
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71 of 92 people found the following review helpful By Paul Fucich on March 1, 2001
Format: Paperback
It does not take psychology to tell us that we all have within us a child. However, it may take psychological work to show us that we are profuse and insistant at shutting this child out.
We are repulsively repressive creatures. I did not take the suggestions of this book and apply any of them. I just read it. And, sure enough my life is slowly going through the motions discussed in this book.
Do not expect this or any one book to help you through your lifes troubles. What you read is what you need to hear for now. Your life will show you what you need to do, and you cannot rush or speed your way through the many recoveries you might need. If you have a sincere lack of fulfillment, if you keep repeating the same mistakes, if your life seems to keep going nowhere. You may very well have to clean house.
This book may show you what you have been doing to yourself all these years. I am a firm believer that this entire planet is peopled with broken hearts..many of us live the lie that we are fine, when in fact our heart was broken years ago and we have yet to acknowledge it, let alone heal it.
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Kaci on February 18, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Sometimes you read a review and wonder. This is the 1st review I've ever given a book. I've been searching for something that spoke to me and the section "unloved child;" well, it made me cry. I had to read it three times to really absorb all of it. This book is not a fast read on any level, if you're serious about really healing your heart. I had no clue how messed up I am until I got this book. I knew I was struggling, but could never put my finger on it until now. I have a paperback as well as kindle edition on my phone when on the go. Thankfully, I'm only an addict of TV!!! :) It made so many things more clear for me and allowed me to be more forgiving with myself, plus more aware of what I'm saying, doing, acting and the true reasons as to why... I always knew that my parents where doing how they were taught, but never did see clearly what it was doing to me until now. If you really want to give your emotional self a hand up by your own adult hand, this book will help. Only read what you can handle in a sitting, don't force it. Good Luck!
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Healing Your Aloneness: Finding Love and Wholeness Through Your Inner Child
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