Hearing Is Believing: How Words Can Make or Break Our Kids [Paperback]

Elisa Medhus (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: March 25, 2004

In Hearing Is Believing, award-winning author Elisa Medhus argues that even seemingly harmless phrases such as "You're such a good girl" can encourage children to become approval seekers, thwart their ability to reason, or both. Over time, these children become less inclined to trust their parents' guidance and internalize their values. Exposing potentially harmful words and phrases, many that may surprise readers, this book suggests language changes that are simple to implement and keep up. Stories illustrate positive results.

Editorial Reviews

Review

“When you love your children and speak to them following the guidelines Elisa Medhus offers in this book you will avoid turning them into ugly ducklings who must find their own beauty and re-parent themselves. So listen, believe, and heal.” — Dr. Bernie Siegel, author of Love, Medicine, and Miracles “Practical, immediately useful advice for every parent-child interaction, this book is laced with humor and written with joy. Reading this, parents can’t help but be more effective with their children!” — Foster W. Cline, MD, coauthor of Parenting with Love and Logic and Parenting Teens with Love and Logic “Hearing Is Believing is as fun to read as it is useful. The humor and insights drew me in, and I found myself applying the principles with my children almost immediately. But the best part of the book is that Elisa Medhus’s suggestions worked!” — Shelly Brady, mother of six and author of New York Times bestseller Ten Things I Learned from Bill Porter --This text refers to the Kindle Edition edition.

Product Details

• Paperback: 256 pages
• Publisher: New World Library (March 25, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1577314271
• ISBN-13: 978-1577314271
• Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 5.6 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #839,455 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

20 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A MUST read!, May 2, 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: Hearing Is Believing: How Words Can Make or Break Our Kids (Paperback)

I didn't expect to laugh the whole way through as well as gain insight into new techniques in parenting. Dr. Elisa Medhus shares how words such as "Stop that!" and "I'm so disappointed in you" are just not the right things to say. Instead she teaches many types of word phrasing:

-Objective
-Observational
-"I" Messages
-Questioning

Examples include: "Feet belong on the floor, not on the table." "It's not safe to rollerblade without a helmet."

She also makes me laugh with her candid guinea-pig examples of family scuffles. It provides a lighthearted and tongue-in-cheek backdrop for the true substance and life applications in "Hearing is Believing." What a great book!

16 of 16 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Every parent should read this book!, May 24, 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: Hearing Is Believing: How Words Can Make or Break Our Kids (Paperback)

What an insightful and helpful guide to parenting. I believe I can do a better job of raising my seven-year-old as a result of reading this book. It made me realize the importance of enabling my child to be more responsible and how that will help him build his self-esteem. Her message was strong and clear that parents need to help children recognize their own self-worth and let that, rather than continual outside validation, determine how they feel about themselves. I feel better prepared to do this after reading this book.

It is well known that the way we raise our children has a huge impact on how they will function as adults. Elisa Medhus allowed me to better understand that. What better gift to give our children than the chance to be highly functioning adults who can actually feel good about themselves? This book will help parents give their children a better shot at a healthy and happy life. The author has a great sense of humor which made the reading all the more enjoyable. I highly recommend this book for all parents.

8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A Must-Read for Any Adult Who Talks to Kids, May 1, 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: Hearing Is Believing: How Words Can Make or Break Our Kids (Paperback)

I've read a lot of books over the years, but this one is truly remarkable and unique. Medhus has a style all her own. Her love for all children, not just her own five, comes through in every paragraph. And from page one, I could tell she's one of us--a mom who's been there in the foxholes struggling to raise her kids in an age when doing so has never been harder. Thank God for the rest of us, she's come up with solutions that can make most of those struggles go away. Her advice is practical and easy to follow, and she presents it in a humorous way that made me laugh from cover to cover. I couldn't put the book down! More important: I've tried her suggestions out, and they really work! Dramatically. My life as a parent has transformed because of it. My three kids are happier and better behaved. Raising them is actually fun--and easy. My relationship with my them (and my husband) is the best it's every been. Plus the whole family seems happier and more peaceful. The real question is: Why hasn't anyone thought of this concept before? Seriously! So, if you want a book that will--almost overnight--change life for the better for you and your kids, read this Hearing is Believing! I'll put good money on a bet that this one will win as many awards as her first book, Raising Children Who Think for Themselves, did.