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I've long been a fan of Karen's (AKA: Baby Sideburns), mostly because she makes me laugh so hard I consider it an ab workout. She says/writes the things most of us only think, but as soon as we read her Facebook status or new blog post, I'm like YES! WHAT SHE SAID! Her book is no different: hilarious, irreverent, tongue-in-cheek and--are you sitting down?--full of heart. Underneath her snark and sarcasm, it's obvious this Mama adores her children. And that's what makes I Heart My Little A-holes so GOOD. It's relatable because it's REAL. And that's Karen: real.

Thanks for the laugh, lady, and everyone else: buy TWO copies. You'll definitely want to give one to your moms as a thank you/I'm sorry gift ;-)
0Comment45 of 47 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you?YesNoReport abuse
on October 21, 2013
In case the title didn't give it away, this book is not for prudes. Or sweet little great grandmas. If you liked "Go the bleep to Sleep", you'll probably like this one.

Back in my less jaded parenting days, I wrote a Facebook post in which I didn't understand how anyone could like a book like that. There are real cases of child abuse and sad tales of infertility - shouldn't we cherish every moment we have with our little love bugs? Well, then I had another baby. And my older daughter turned 3. And suddenly I understood that this kind of humor is a coping mechanism for crazed parents. Because if we don't laugh, we will never stop crying.

The reason I gave this 4 stars instead of 5 is that it felt like much of the material was recycled from her blog. Still hilarious and worth buying, but if you are an avid reader of the blog you will feel like you read many of these stories before.
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on October 21, 2013
Baby sideburns says what most mothers think on a daily basis but don't want to say out loud. I have always loved her blog, but this book has made me a true fan.
Hilarious, mouth dropping humor!
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on October 21, 2013
I am not a parent, I'm merely an observer of people with children. As such, I found the book incredibly HILARIOUS and right in line with her FB and column posts. Karen has a way with words and she certainly knows how to make people laugh. I'll be right in line for her second book!
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on October 29, 2013
Great read. I read this while 7 months with my third. Helped me get thru OB appointments, sleepless nights, and my whiney four year old. Baby Sideburns says what we all think at one point in time while being a parent. Her blunt honesty had me laughing my butt off.
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on October 20, 2013
An awesomely hysterical book about parenting for anyone who is, or has had, a parent. Not for the faint of heart who don't appreciate the proper use of some vulgarity for its full humorous potential!
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on October 29, 2013
Baby Sideburns, you totally summed up what it's like being the mom of 2 little ones! Thanks for letting me know that I'm not the only one dropping f-bombs directed at my own little a-holes!
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on February 6, 2014
Karen Alpert (a.k.a., Baby Sideburns) cobbles together more than a dozen posts and short quips (probably originally created for Facebook) from her popular blog in this highly disappointing compilation-style mommy memoir. Jill Smokler's cover endorsement calling the book "absolutely hysterical" and "everything you could want in a parenting book and more" makes me wonder whether she actually read it. Sure, some of the lines are funny and certain small segments are even well-done, but - on the whole - the crass (a bit of potty humor must be part of any mom's life, but the sheer volume of hers got very old), defeatist (having kids likely isn't what makes her body "s*ck balls," the crappy eating habits that she continually shame-brags about and her belief that no amount of exercise will help probably do), and repetitive (listing nine items on a top-10 because "I'm too lazy to write more" was funny the first time but not the third; same thing goes for constantly joking about how hard it is to spell) nature of the content grated and made finishing the book a chore. I also wonder whether her choice to organize chapters around similar blog posts - rather than mixing the material up - hurt the book's readability. Here's the bottom line: if you want a funny book about parenting (as opposed to a parenting book), go for Jim Gaffigan's "Dad Is Fat" or Jill Smokler's "Confessions of a Scary Mommy"; if you absolutely insist on reading this book, at least take it in very small doses.

That said, here are a couple of her winning lines (if only she would stick with relatable, smart observations like these rather than turning herself into a mommy shock jock):

"The first time you hear [your child say `Mama'], your heart melts a little. The second time you hear it, your eyes well up. The 918,009,576th time you hear it, you want to stab your eardrums out with an ice pick."

"As I'm standing there begging my kid to hold onto my shoulders and not my head as I help her pull on her pants, I dream of the day when she can dress herself. And then it happens. Ohhh myyyy Goddddd, it's like watching paint dry. . . . And don't even get me started on shoes. They're Velcro! They accidentally get stuck to everything so how F'ing hard can it be to close them?!"

"So why the hell when I change a poopie diaper and I scrub like [a surgeon] do my fingers still smell like poop for the rest of the day? Because if they still smell, I have to assume it's because they have poo particles on them . . . ."

"I love how the experts tell us if we're gonna let our kids watch TV we should watch it with them. WHAT?!!! Why on earth do you think I'm putting her in front of the TV in the first place, Mr. So-called Expert? To get some s*&t done."

"I don't have bags under my eyes. I have luggage sets."
11 comment21 of 29 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you?YesNoReport abuse
on January 28, 2014
If you are the type of parent that thinks your child is perfect and pees honey and poops rainbows, then do not read this book. However if you are like 99.9% of the remaining parents sitting firmly in REALITY, this book is for you. I'm only halfway through it since my 8 year old keeps trying to see "what's so funny that you're crying laughing?". Have to read it at night or when hiding from my kids in the restroom or closet. LOVE this book and the author's take on her daily grind. You can tell she loves her kids immensely - she just also has a sense of humor about life that keeps her (somewhat) sane. :)
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on October 30, 2013
If you're a parent, and not following Baby Sideburns, why not??! She says what we're all thinking and if you're not thinking it, you're in denial! Her lists will knock you over because you're laughing so hard! I read the book in 4 hours, it was just so funny. I even had my husband laughing. The "shampoop" was especially funny. Hope she writes another book.
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