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Heck: Where the Bad Kids Go
 
 
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Heck: Where the Bad Kids Go [Paperback]

Dale E. Basye (Author), Bob Dob (Illustrator)
3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (40 customer reviews)

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Book Description

9 and up4 and upHeck
When Milton and Marlo Fauster die in a marshmallow-bear explosion, they get sent straight to Heck, an otherworldly reform school. Milton can understand why his kleptomaniac sister is here, but Milton is—or was—a model citizen. Has a mistake been made? Not according to Bea “Elsa” Bubb, the Principal of Darkness. She doesn’t make mistakes. She personally sees to it that Heck—whether it be home ec class with Lizzie Borden, ethics with Richard Nixon, or gym with Blackbeard the pirate—is especially, well, heckish for the Fausters. Will Milton and Marlo find a way to escape? Or are they stuck here for all eternity, or until they turn eighteen, whichever comes first?

★ “The author’ umpteen clever allusions . . . make this book truly sparkle.”—Publishers Weekly, Starred

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Editorial Reviews

From School Library Journal

Grade 6–8—Quintessential good-kid Milton Fauster knows all about his sister Marlo's life of petty crime. So, when they are both killed in a freak marshmallow explosion, he isn't surprised that she doesn't qualify for Heaven, but he's shocked to find that he isn't going there either. They end up in Heck, an unearthly reform school that isn't quite Hell, but certainly not a place anyone would want to stay in "for all eternity—or until they turn 18, whichever comes first." Principal Bea "Elsa" Bubb figures that there is something irregular about Milton's soul contract and keeps a close eye on him. Milton, meanwhile, plans to escape. During a dreary class, he meets Virgil, who has a map of the Nine Circles of Heck. Unfortunately, the only way out is through the sewer pipes, literally "down the toilet." The torments of the darned are described in vivid and often grotesque detail. Errant toddlers nap in gingerbread coffins while Boogeypeople read them Edgar Allan Poe. Milton and company make two graphically described voyages through the underworld plumbing. There are numerous classical and historical allusions, many of which will sail over the heads of the intended audience. ("I have an ax to grind with you," snarls home-economics teacher Lizzie Borden, after giving the celery 40 whacks.) In the end, the clever, if somewhat disturbing premise is overwhelmed by slow pacing and relentless descriptions of garbage, sewage, and other heckishly unpleasant things.—Elaine E. Knight, Lincoln Elementary Schools, IL
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Booklist

Welcome to Grizzly Mall: Home of the State’s Second-Largest Bear-Themed Marshmallow Statue! Such is the Kansas-fed, white-bread suburb 13-year-old Marlo Faustus longs to escape. And escape she does, with her unwitting, innocent younger brother, Milton, when said sculpture explodes, and they arrive, newly deceased, in Heck—where the bad kids go. Puns and allusions abound, enough to sate the corniest appetite, even if many will slide right by the reader: the kids’ limbo  is ruled by one Bea Elsa Bubb, Principal of Darkness, and faculty include Mr. Nixon (ethics), Lizzie Borden (home ec), and Mr. Dior (fashion, though his sole offense appears to be that he is effete). Beneath the jocular surface, though, Marlo and Milton work through a complex sibling relationship on their quest for escape. Can they put aside their differences to elude the Boogeypeople and hall demonitors free the jarred blobs of lost souls, hatch a getaway, and stay together? Heck if I know. Grades 3-6. --Thom Barthelmess --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

  • Reading level: Ages 9 and up
  • Paperback: 304 pages
  • Publisher: Yearling; Reprint edition (April 28, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0375840761
  • ISBN-13: 978-0375840760
  • Product Dimensions: 5.4 x 0.7 x 7.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (40 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #695,968 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author


The idea for Heck: Where the Bad Kids Go came to me where most of my ideas come from: that area just behind the eyes and somewhere, approximately, between the ears. Of course, every story needs what is commonly referred to as a protagonist. That is, a hero, or-at the very least-someone whom the reader can relate to in some way while serving as a guide through a host of unpleasant, fantastical circumstances. Often, the protagonist mirrors the author, not for any significant reason other than it's much easier for the author (fewer things to make up) while giving him/her the perfect excuse to write about himself/herself. Ever the overachiever, I decided to have two protagonists-hardly a "novel" idea-but it allowed me to write through my dual selves-the ever cautious, perpetually in-his-head Milton, and the tart, impulse-control-challenged Marlo.

Preadolescence can feel like an eternity when you're in it, but you actually get through it fairly unscathed, though your body and voice may soon be rendered unrecognizable. This complete freakishness is normal. So let laughter and perseverance be your best and most trusted bodyguards, providing loyal service without even demanding your lunch money in return.


 

Customer Reviews

40 Reviews
5 star:
 (16)
4 star:
 (12)
3 star:
 (4)
2 star:
 (6)
1 star:
 (2)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
3.9 out of 5 stars (40 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

16 of 17 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars Heart & Soul of Heck, August 20, 2008
By 
What a great premise this book has. Polar opposite siblings, bad-girl goth Marlo and straight-laced bookish Milton, die in a marshmellow explosion and both end up in Heck, not H-E-double-hockey-sticks, but more of an inferno with training wheel, a reform school from, well, hell. Basye stocks his colorful underworld with a pack of cleverly named characters in ironic situations (Nixon teaching ethics, Lizzie Borden teaching Home Ec). But the book sends mixed messages. Many of the references geared over the head of its adolescent audience (how many 12 year olds know who Typhoid Mary was or what Watergate was all about?). And he never quite explains what the purpose of this place is, is it an opportunity for redemption? Is it a Roald Dahl-style nightmare land for kids to escape? That part of the story could have been better developed; if it had the story would have reached a whole new level. But it does have charm, mainly the charm of the tug-of-war bond between the two heroes. Whether they're fighting each other or fighting for each other, Marlo and Milton's relationship is a true brother-sister relationship, and they are together the heart and soul of the book.
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14 of 17 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Oh Heck...I love this book!, August 2, 2008
Who would I recommend this book to? Anyone and Everyone...regardless of age.

This book, by new author Dale Basye, is the most entertaining, inventive and creative reads I have experienced in a long time. I actually compared it to Memoirs of a Geisha and The Historian...not for the story lines (duh...obviously) but in the sense that those two books had a style of writing that made you feel like you could really see every little detail of the surroundings. Those books made me want to visit Asia and Europe....and now I wish there really was a HECK...and I wish I could visit it!! Although I'm pretty sure with my track record, I will be going to a far hotter, more grown up destination.

A darkly funny, sometimes silly (boogers and poop are funny no matter how young or old), always entertaining tale of Milton and Marlo Fauster - two siblings sent straight to Heck: an otherwordly reform school.

With teachers like Lizzie Borden (Home Ec) Richard Nixon (ethics) and Blackbeard The Pirate (gym) and the likes of Principal Bea "Elsa" Bubb breathing down their necks it seems unlikely they will ever escape.

I loved Heck so much, I recommended it to my book club (a group of 30-something savvy readers) and everyone is really excited to read it. The gals with children loved the idea of reading a book club book to their kids. We are Portland, OR based and hoping to have the author join us to discuss his inspiration. (Hey...we can dream!)

I already anxiously await the 2nd book!
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Remember when...?, July 5, 2011
By 
This review is from: Heck: Where the Bad Kids Go (Paperback)
I loved this book, beginning with the overtly euphemistic title (Remember 'Phil' from Dilbert? 'Prince of Insufficient Light,' come to 'darn you to Heck, for an inconveniently long time'?)
To any moderately literate adult the name-puns are delicious: Milton, Marlo, Fauster, Virgil... and the satire is infectuous: Nixon teaching ethics; Lizzie Borden teaching home economics.

In reading through the reviews on this book -- particularly the negative reviews -- I am struck by how few adults apparently retain any memory of how they thought and felt as children. Maybe this is a good thing, but if so, said adults probably ought not to be reading and reviewing children's books.

Yes, many satiric references will go over the heads of most kids in the target audience (4th-6th graders). But how many of us who grew up watching reruns of "The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show" got the humor in "Boris Badenov," "Natasha Fatale," or in the coordinator of the communist spy-network, "Fearless Leader" being a Nazi, when we were 10 years old?

I view "Heck" in that same vein, a story designed to appeal to kids, but with a little something extra tucked in there for parents who happen to pick up the book. And hey, now and then a kid just might be impelled to -ask- a parent, "so who the heck was Nixon?" providing an opportunity for parent/child interaction _and_ a history lesson, rolled into one.

Then there is the gross-out humor and repetition. A lot of time is spent encountering bodily secretions in a variety of disgusting settings. Too much time for most adults, probably, but it's hard to fathom how any adult who's spent time around kids in this age-range could be so deaf as to not notice that 4th-graders find this stuff hysterically funny.

And yes, the "Bea 'Elsa' Bub" pun gets repeated over and over and over... But has any parent not had the experience of their ten or eleven-year old learning a (to them) new joke, and then repeating it endlessly for days and weeks -- in appropriate and inappropriate situations -- until the next "new" joke came along?

In short, I think Dale Basye understands his intended audience very well indeed, and does an excellent job of writing for them. That he's also erudite enough to create some amusing adult satire with characters like Blackbeard and Typhoid Mary along the way is just icing on the cake. I can't wait to read the next book in the series. I highly recommend this book for 9-13 year old readers, and to those adults who retain at least a vague recollection of what -they- were like at those ages.

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Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
secret toilet, foul playground, demon guards
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Principal Bubb, Miss Borden, Von Trapp, Assessment Chamber, Miss Fauster, Where the Bad Kids Go Milton, Disorientation Center, Grizzly Mall, Gates of Heck, Totally Bunks, Milton Fauster, Galactic Order Department, Toaster Roller Coaster, Department of Unendurable Redundancy, Miss Sheraton, Not-So-Silly String, River Styx, The Boogeyperson, Beautiful Balloon, Bad Kids, Dog God
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