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Help, Mom! There are Arminians Under My Bed! Paperback – January 28, 2013


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 34 pages
  • Publisher: CrossBooks (January 28, 2013)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1462724825
  • ISBN-13: 978-1462724826
  • Product Dimensions: 8.5 x 0.1 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 4 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 3.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (24 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #3,429,594 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

JD Hall is the pastor of Fellowship Church in Eastern Montana, where he lives with his wife, Mandy, and three children. JD is a co-founder of Reformation Montana, a network and mission society consisting of Reformed Baptist churches in Montana and the surrounding region. He is a columnist for the Intermountain Christian News, and operates the Pulpit and Pen website. JD received his B.A. in Christian Education from Williams Baptist College and M.A. in History from Arkansas State University.

Customer Reviews

3.2 out of 5 stars
5 star
46%
4 star
13%
3 star
0%
2 star
0%
1 star
42%
See all 24 customer reviews
I can't even begin to explain how wrong it is that this book even exists.
Dan Allison
At first I could not believe that this was a real book but after researching the author, I am sad to say that it is indeed, written from a serious perspective.
Amazon Customer
I highly recommend this book to anyone who has theologically-minded children!
Jacobus Walshimus

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

220 of 244 people found the following review helpful By B. Ditto on May 29, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
We bought this for our three boys, Beza, Calvin, and Van Till! They loved every minute of this book! Buying this book will root my children in a holy fear of the Arminian heresy!!! The joy they got out of this book made me almost as happy as when little Calvin started quoting the Institutes, little Van Till argued for the existence of God by assuming He existed, and little Beza threw rocks at that Methodist kid in his class! I know that God has predestined them to great things!!! I am so proud of my three little supralapsarians!!!"
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56 of 64 people found the following review helpful By Jacobus Walshimus on June 3, 2013
Format: Paperback
I highly recommend this book to anyone who has theologically-minded children! And by anyone I mean anyone in the whole world...And by whole world, I mean the elect.

I love the colorful illustrations, and all bible references were in the ESV, which was nice. This is a great story for reformed children between the ages of 4-12, but would also be appropriate for pre-teen Dispensationalists and adult Pelagians .
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13 of 16 people found the following review helpful By bgffrd on June 14, 2013
Format: Paperback
I highly recommend this book for all right-thinking Christian households. We have included it in our children's homeschooling curriculum along with those other irreplaceable texts "Noah's Pet Dinosaur" (what a tear-jerker!), "God Loves America Best (After Israel)" and of course "Help, Mom! There Are Gays In My Bed!".

Of course, if you are not one of the Elect, never mind.
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22 of 33 people found the following review helpful By Charles Atkinson on May 31, 2013
Format: Paperback
The latter two reviews misunderstood the spelling. Ar·min·i·an (är-mn-n)
adj.
Of or relating to the theology of Jacobus Arminius and his followers, who rejected the Calvinist doctrines of predestination and election and who believed that human free will is compatible with God's sovereignty.
Ar·mini·an n.
Ar·mini·an·ism n.
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4 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Keith on June 14, 2013
Format: Paperback
Just bought and read the book on Kindle in under 10 minutes. Seems like a great place to start with small children. Eventually I would want to move my kids on to something a little heavier, but this still provides a great foundation.
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5 of 9 people found the following review helpful By Huckabeast on June 20, 2013
Format: Paperback
When my two dear sons (Tulip and KJV) first started creeping into my room at night, crying about the Arminians under their beds, my wife and I were simply beside ourselves. We bought them night lights, crawled under their beds ourselves, and explained to them that Arminians are far too busy worrying about whether or not their salvation is secure to be hiding under beds, but it was all for nothing. Tulip and KJV barely slept, and my wife and I started feeling as tired as Jacobus Arminius must have felt whenever he started questioning God's sovereignty! Fortunately, this book has taught Tulip and KJV that the only thing to fear from the Arminian Heresy are their churches, and since neither of them will ever darken such doors, they can sleep easy, as long as they are the Elect, which they probably are (not sure I can say the same for my daughter.)
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20 of 36 people found the following review helpful By Amazon Customer on June 5, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition
It is clear, that for the author, the only dialogue to be had is the belittling of those who don't share his specific, extreme viewpoint. At first I could not believe that this was a real book but after researching the author, I am sad to say that it is indeed, written from a serious perspective. I will, at some point share this with my daughter, but only as an example of one can make a fool out of oneself.

Positives: only the amusement one gets from realizing that the author takes himself seriously.

Negatives: well, isn't that kind of obvious? Look at the title.
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20 of 36 people found the following review helpful By Gary S. Shogren on May 31, 2013
Format: Paperback
Maybe the book is less offensive than the cover, but presenting other believers - even "misled" ones - as monsters who frighten young children? This should never pass muster among the truly reformed. Great if you want to taunt your opponents and make your compatriots feel good about themselves, not if you want to show your viewpoint is the more biblical (and by definition, more loving).
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