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Here Lies My Heart: Essays on Why We Marry, Why We Don't, and What We Find There (A Beacon Anthology)
 
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Here Lies My Heart: Essays on Why We Marry, Why We Don't, and What We Find There (A Beacon Anthology) [Paperback]

Amy Bloom (Foreword), Beacon Press (Author)
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)

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Book Description

A Beacon Anthology April 1, 1999
This book is for the once, never, and much married. For believers and skeptics, love's fools and love's thieves. It is for people with long memories and long histories and for people who reinvent themselves in every new town, new decade, new relationship. This book is for everyone whose heart lies where it should, where it shouldn't, and, in the end, where it must. -Amy Bloom, from the Foreword

In these intensely personal essays, contemporary writers probe their experiences in and thoughts about one of our most enduring social and cultural institutions. Husbands and wives celebrate marriages that work, mourn those that don't, and write frankly about adultery. Includes essays by Mark Doty, Gerald Early, Barbara Ehrenreich, Cynthia Heimel, Vivian Gornick, Phillip Lopate, Nancy Mairs, and David Mamet.

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Editorial Reviews

From Library Journal

Two thirtysomething editors at Beacon Press had a conversation one day about marriage and thought others would be interested in the topic, too. They selected 20 essays, previously published in places like GQ, Ms., and Harpers, by contemporary American writers including Amy Hempel, Joel Achenbach, and Gerald Early. These contributors relate their own experiences with marriage, infidelity, divorce, singlehood, and relationships with the opposite sex. Edward Hoagland describes his love life from his a little late loss of virginity through two divorces in Strange Perfume. Louise DeSalvo (see Writing as a Way of Healing, reviewed on p. 110) tells how her husbands infidelity shocked her and led her to become a new person in Adultery. Willie Morris, in the title essay, describes the heart-rending pain of divorce. In For Better and Worse, Lynn Darling details the ups and downs of marriage. For larger or specialized public or academic collections.Nancy P. Shires, East Carolina Univ., Greenville, NC
Copyright 1999 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From Kirkus Reviews

Heres that rarity: a short, piquant anthology on a subject of (almost) universal interest. Chasman and Jhee, Beacon editors, bring together highly personal pieces by 21 contemporary American writers (e.g., Barbara Ehrenreich, David Mamet, Willie Morris) offering some terrifically wry and insightful observations about how difficult it is to make a success of marriage and domestic life, given our culture of careerist individualism. Invariably, some silly and superficial me-oriented things also get said, as by memoirist Louise DeSalvo: I have come to see the impulse towards adultery as the selfs yearning to realize its latent potential. But for the most part, the reflections here appear to be the fruit of considerable thought following much emotional wear-and-tear. For example, Vivian Gornick writes of the alternating joys and sorrows of living alone; several other contributors depict scenes of love and loss, whether through a partners infidelity, divorce, or death. The most moving piece, Mark Dotys An Exiles Psalm, concerns the authors attempt both to mourn his long-time lover, who died of AIDS, and to exult in the unexpected joy of a new relationship. Many writers allude to adultery, potential or actual, liberating or tormented. Yet Chasman and Jhee have included not a single autobiographical essay on that most elusive and enviable feat, a relatively long and happy marriage; perhaps it was difficult to find a writer to describe such an experience. Still, the majority of men and women still feel they can defy the oddswhy? Essayist Gerald Early replies, Marriage, in its barbarous civility, in its impossible dependence and impossible expectation, assures one that in the vast meaninglessness of the world, one can . . . hope to find the true rudder of meaning, at last. Whether theres meaning to be found, or merely emotional coldness after a marital rift, love and marriage continue to fire the imagination, as this absorbing collection attests. -- Copyright ©1999, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 224 pages
  • Publisher: Beacon Press (April 1, 1999)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0807062170
  • ISBN-13: 978-0807062173
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.5 x 8.5 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #144,859 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

 

Customer Reviews

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Average Customer Review
4.4 out of 5 stars (5 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Intimate, moving, thought-provoking, December 13, 1999
By A Customer
This review is from: Here Lies My Heart: Essays on Why We Marry, Why We Don't, and What We Find There (A Beacon Anthology) (Paperback)
The stories in this book are lovely. They are sad, moving, deeply thought-out vignettes of various aspects of marriage, married life and/or relationships. The stories probably won't change your life but the reader is afforded an intimate glimpse into the private, often painful and loving world of relationships. I found the writing in many of the stories to be breathtaking.
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9 of 10 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Head and shoulder above other books in this genre, March 15, 2000
By A Customer
This review is from: Here Lies My Heart: Essays on Why We Marry, Why We Don't, and What We Find There (A Beacon Anthology) (Paperback)
I've been reading a lot of books about love and relationships in connection with a book I'm working on, and this collections of essays was so superior to the others in the quality of the writing and the honesty and charm of the personal accounts (with a few notable exceptions, including Edward Hoagland's essay) that I made a special effort to post a comment here. This would be an excellent book to give a friend who has a perfectly wonderful marriage that he or she is thinking of walking out on, or to someone who's just experiencing a case of the marriage blahs.
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6 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Witty and insightful but limited, November 11, 2000
By A Customer
This review is from: Here Lies My Heart: Essays on Why We Marry, Why We Don't, and What We Find There (A Beacon Anthology) (Paperback)
As with many anthologies of individual experiences, Here Lies My Heart relies on common themes--coping with the routine of a relationship, straying vs. staying, self vs. couple's identity. Overall it hit a negative note. It also overlooked a growing segment of the population--those who have never married and managed to find a degree of contentment. This book wasn't about why people don't marry--it was about how people work through staying in or leaving a marriage.
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