3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
A Timely and Much-Needed Communiqué to Boys and Young Men, August 27, 2009
This review is from: Heroes of the Blue Sky Rebellion: How You and Other Young Men Can Claim All the Happiness in the World (Paperback)
Jack Kammer must have been speaking to some of my needs and desires as well as those of his target audience, because I could hardly put this book down until I was done with it. And I'm 51.
The central premise of this book is that boys and young men are being hurt by cultural conventions and commonly accepted assumptions about men and the male experience that devalue and disregard both their inner and outer lives. Some of this damage is occurring as the result of misunderstanding and some of it is being inflicted to maintain advantage. Unfortunately, older males, immersed as they are in their own struggles and points of view, are and have been largely unavailable to help boys and young men identify and work toward resolution of these issues.
As a result, Mr. Kammer has taken the approach of attempting to address boys and young men directly, and he has done so in a style that is friendly, candid, engaging, and encouraging.
I had a very upsetting experience recently that validated the need for what Mr. Kammer is trying to accomplish with this book, and his strategy for reaching out to younger males to do it. I was in the "break room" at work (a horrid little narrow enclosed space with microwave ovens, vending machines, and fluorescent overhead lights) and I heard a group of guys I know who are in their late 30s to late 40s sharing "funny stories" about the beatings they received from their dads when they were boys. There wasn't a trace of sadness, anger, outrage, or injustice from any of them, not the storytellers and not the listeners, and many of these men have boys in their early teens. One of the men was actually laughing about how funny he always thought it was when he saw his father beating his brother, because his brother was "jumping around to get away" and "making such a fuss about it." The consensus, from both the speakers and the listeners, was that these stories were hilarious and, furthermore, that the beatings were "necessary" to "keep them in line" and "show them how to behave."
Now these are not bad guys. All of them are actually quite entertaining and very likable, and I know they care about their children, all of which only fed the cognitive dissonance I experienced during and after hearing what they were saying. I knew they were speaking out of a place of frozen feelings, rationalization, and the conditioning that allowed them to shut down and distance from themselves so they could bear what was being done to them when they were children who couldn't fight back. But I also knew that these were grown men who'd abdicated their responsibilities to deal with their own experiences and histories, and in the process, abandoned the next generation of boys and men, some of whom are their own sons.
How can these guys be the kinds of fathers who teach their boys how to be mature, courageous, fully functional, loving and self-aware men? Those boys will be, and have been, on their own in that respect. So I think Mr. Kammer is right to try to reach out directly to this next generation of young men in the way he's chosen, because so many of their fathers aren't going to listen to him, or me, or anyone else.
I know that at least one of the men who was telling his "funny stories" feels castrated, powerless, hopeless, and victimized in what he sees as a dead-end job, because he's told me so more than once, although not in those words. He knows he's being used, backstabbed, and manipulated by cowardly managers who only see him as a means to an end. But he doesn't see, or doesn't want to see, the connection between how he feels today and how he was "kept in line" as a child. These guys get all bound up in their pension plans and mortgages and they feel too trapped to feel anything that might threaten any of it. And they're passing the same trap on to their sons.
So I'm excited to see this book. I support its message, and I hope it reaches some of the many boys who are struggling to be themselves without many (or any) good male models for doing so, because their fate is truly in their own hands.
Rick Belden
Author,
Iron Man Family Outing : Poems About Transition Into A More Conscious Manhood
Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
Was this review helpful to you? Yes
No
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Let the Blue Sky Rebellion begin!, October 7, 2009
This review is from: Heroes of the Blue Sky Rebellion: How You and Other Young Men Can Claim All the Happiness in the World (Paperback)
I LOVED this book. Once I started it, I could not put it down. Once I finished it, I ordered ten copies and will give them to ten men and boys I know who will also love it and be equally moved by it.
Mr. Kammer has done what I might have thought was impossible, to take the emotional heart of so many of the recent and not-so-recent books about men and boys (from Farrell's _Myth of Male Power_ to _Real Boys_, _Raising Cain_ etc.), and frame it in a way that will speak to, and hopefully motivate boys and young men to publicly speak out about gender inequities and societally sanctioned ways to shoehorn boys into the role of worker drones who too often are isolated from their friends, their families, and themselves and their true passions. It will also help them/us to privately reflect on how comfortable we really are with these assumed roles, and to be freer with imagining a world where men (and women) have more choice about work.
My favorite section, besides (surprisingly) the footnotes - which are scrupulously researched and carefully garnered to support the kinds of discussions that this book will inevitably lead to - was the section on building allies in this rebellion: practical techniques for how to deal with predictable setbacks and challenges that will arise from different quarters as young men begin to get more free. All in all, it is a book that speaks as from an uncle's caring vantage to boys ages 13 - 23 about their identity and other core, important ideas - and, if they like what they hear, gives them great practical strategies to begin to change their world and ours into a more beautiful and humane place. And so I say, let the Blue Sky Rebellion begin!!!
Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
Was this review helpful to you? Yes
No
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
We need these rebels today...., September 22, 2009
This review is from: Heroes of the Blue Sky Rebellion: How You and Other Young Men Can Claim All the Happiness in the World (Paperback)
Jack Kammer has done what should be done with this topic. He's created a book that young men everywhere can read and comprehend - understanding where men are given the short end of the stick in our society. However, Jack did not choose to write an angry rant against the 'system.' Instead, he has chosen the more difficult - but ultimately more effective - path of helping young men understand how to command respect and keep their self-esteem under their own control. Rather than waiting until we've grown up and been programmed to feel inadequate because of our gender, Jack is educating young men everywhere on how to avoid the problem before it starts.
He's teaching not to be angry at the injustice, but to take the reins of their own happiness.
"Heroes of the Blue Sky Rebellion" is a short and effective read, from start to finish. His research is solid, and completely documented.
I highly recommend this become a required read for young men who are growing into their own mature identity - for the good of men AND women everywhere.
[...]
Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
Was this review helpful to you? Yes
No