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The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child: Helping Your Child Thrive in an Extroverted World
 
 
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The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child: Helping Your Child Thrive in an Extroverted World [Paperback]

Marti Olsen Laney Psy.D. (Author)
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)

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Book Description

December 1, 2005
Introverted children are often misunderstood, even by their parents, who worry about them. Engaged by their interior world, they’re often regarded as aloof. Easily overwhelmed by too much stimulation, they can be seen as unmotivated. Content with just one or two close friends, they may be perceived as unpopular. Parents fret that they are unhappy and maladjusted. But the truth is quite different: Introverted children are creative problem solvers. Introverted children love to learn. Introverted children have a high EQ (emotional IQ) and are in touch with their feelings. They take time to stop and smell the roses, and they enjoy their own company. They are dependable, persistent, flexible, and lack vanity.

How can parents help their introverted children discover and cultivate these wonderful gifts? Help is here. Written by Dr. Marti Olsen Laney, author of The Introvert Advantage with 74,000 copies in print, The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child fully explains introversion as a hardwired temperament, not a disability, and tells just what parents need to do to help their child become the person he or she is meant to be—and succeed in an extroverted world. Beginning with a 30-question quiz that places a child on the introvert/extrovert continuum, The Hidden Gifts shows parents how to foster a climate that allows introverted kids to discover their inner strengths; schedule ways for a very young innie to recharge those batteries and teach an older child to do it for him- or herself; create a harmonious household with siblings, and parents, of different temperaments; help innies find success at school, sports, parties, and other group activities.

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The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child: Helping Your Child Thrive in an Extroverted World + The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World + Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life Is Your Hidden Strength
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Editorial Reviews

Review

"Dr. Laney's insights ino introverts are invaluable....Behavior that in the past I found baffling, now makes sense. Parents will find her explanations a wonderful help."
—Deborah Tannen, author of You Just Don't Understand and You're Wearing That?

From the Back Cover

Do you have a child who hangs back at birthday parties? Who dreads being called on in class? Who hugs the sidelines, and who surprises you by seeming withdrawn or aloof in public but turns into a chatterbox at home?

The plight of the introverted child is to be often misunderstood. Parents, siblings, classmates, teacher, and—most devastatingly—the child himself feel that there's something wrong with him. With The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child, Dr. Marti Olsen Laney brings wisdom and science together to provide parents with an essential guide to raising a successful, well-adjusted innie. It covers the hard-wired introvert temperament; introvert-extrovert family dynamics; navigating school, sports, and social life; and especilly, how to draw out your introvert's hidden gifts, which may include a love of learning, empathy, creativity, and flexibility—virtues easily lost in the bluster of an extroverted world.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Workman Publishing Company; First Edition edition (December 1, 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0761135243
  • ISBN-13: 978-0761135241
  • Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 6 x 1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #71,795 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Marti Olsen Laney, Psy.D., is a researcher, educator, author, and psychotherapist. One of America's foremost authorities on introversion, she speaks and leads workshops on the topic in the United States and Canada. She and her extroverted husband have two grown daughters and four grandchildren. They live in Portland, Oregon.

 

Customer Reviews

13 Reviews
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Average Customer Review
4.2 out of 5 stars (13 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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17 of 17 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Good for parents and teachers, March 31, 2006
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This review is from: The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child: Helping Your Child Thrive in an Extroverted World (Paperback)
As an innie, I appreciate any resources that help others to understand the different learning styles and needs that introverts have from extroverts. I don't need a scientific explanation of why I am different, but do need to be understood for who I am. I am pleased to see that one of the reviewers found this valuable both as a parent and as a teacher. I wish more teachers would be open-minded toward our differences, and accepting of the different needs of different children. Too often children are expected to fit into one mold, and if they don't then they are labeled as difficult or uncooperative (or learning disabled).
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13 of 13 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Describes half the so-called "difficult" kids I know, July 11, 2009
This review is from: The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child: Helping Your Child Thrive in an Extroverted World (Paperback)
My first reaction was, I'm _not_ going to like this book. The title seems too pop-psychology and the whole "hidden gifts" thing... anyway, my snap judgment was that this would be a cheesy book.

Boy, am I glad I was wrong.

America is an extroverted country. Nearly 75% of the people you have met are extraverts - they get energized by getting it done, getting going, getting together. Zoom zoom zoom. Certainly our media is set up that way, and our success stories are full of it. So, ... 75% of the kids you have met are naturally inclined to do well in the zoom zoom culture.

That leaves out 25% of the kids you have met, kids who cherish simplicity and deep relationships, and who do not go with the fast-paced flow. Introversion is normal - it is not a problem to be corrected, just like we don't try to change a child's left- or right-handedness.

These kids may seem spacey or dreamy, and sometimes they are overlooked by the world. They need lots of downtime to recharge their batteries. For these kids, being in school is like being a rubberband. It's a stretch for them to get on a crowded schoolbus, then getting started on their day in a classroom full of kids is even more of a stretch. All day, they are surrounded by people, stretching, stretching. They are *far* out of their comfort zone, and sometimes, that rubberband snaps.

Their teachers say that they have trouble with social skills, or they may get fixated on one topic or one friend to the exclusion of the others. The teacher may suspect a psychological problem, like ADD. These children may complain of being sleepy, or they may just give up in the middle of the day, completely out of energy. But they are not difficult or diseased or disturbed. They are performing an unpleasant task - spending all their energy with no time to relax.

Most classrooms are extroverted classrooms, with lots going on and a strictly-enforced fast pace.

This book gave me a handle on introverted children and how to approach them, how to recognize and encourage them, and how to offer them the quiet time and orderliness they crave. It's written to equip parents with a toolbox for teaching coping skills to their introverted kids.

My favorite idea in the book was... introverted kids are like contented trees. Trees dig those roots in deep sigh with the wind. Children like to have roots, too. Orderliness and predictable patterns give them that rootedness. That, and your love and acceptance!
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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars True...Completely True, April 10, 2006
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This review is from: The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child: Helping Your Child Thrive in an Extroverted World (Paperback)
As an introverted person, this is a very valid book detailing the characteristics of an introvert. I have gone through many of the situations decribed in this book. A must buy if you know someone with this personality. A++++ Book.
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Inside This Book (learn more)
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
introverted children, extroverted world, hap hits, chat time
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
The Heart of the Matter, Give It the Gas, Hardiness Zone, Harry Potter, Captain Hook, Temperament Quiz
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