The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them [Paperback]

Elaine Aron (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: October 8, 2002

The bestselling author and psychologist whose books have topped 240,000 copies in print now addresses the trait of “high sensitivity” in children–and offers a breakthrough parenting guidebook for highly sensitive children and their caregivers.

With the publication of The Highly Sensitive Person, Elaine Aron became the first person to identify the inborn trait of “high sensitivity” and to show how it affects the lives of those who possess it. Up to 20 percent of the population is born highly sensitive, and now in The Highly Sensitive Child, Aron shifts her focus to highly sensitive children, who share the same characteristics as highly sensitive adults and thus face unique challenges as they grow up.

Rooted in Aron’s years of experience as a psychotherapist and her original research on child temperament, The Highly Sensitive Child shows how HSCs are born deeply reflective, sensitive to the subtle, and easily overwhelmed. These qualities can make for smart, conscientious, creative children, but with the wrong parenting or schooling, they can become unusually shy or timid, or begin acting out. Few parents and teachers understand where this behavior comes from–and as a result, HSCs are often mislabeled as overly inhibited, fearful, or “fussy,”or classified as “problem children” (and in some cases, misdiagnosed with disorders such as Attention Deficit Disorder). But raised with proper understanding and care, HSCs are no more prone to these problems than nonsensitive children and can grow up to be happy, healthy, well-adjusted adults.

In this pioneering work, parents will find helpful self-tests and case studies to help them understand their HSC, along with thorough advice on:
• The challenges of raising an highly sensitive child

• The four keys to successfully parenting an HSC

• How to soothe highly sensitive infants

• Helping sensitive children survive in a not-so-sensitive world

• Making school and friendships enjoyable


With chapters addressing the needs of specific age groups, from newborns through teens, The Highly Sensitive Child delivers warmhearted, timely information for parents, teachers, and the sensitive children in their lives.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

As a highly sensitive person (HSP) herself and a psychotherapist, Aron is in a strong position to provide guidance to parents who are raising highly sensitive children (HSCs), and provides here a wealth of useful suggestions and case studies. The author, who has studied and written about what she calls "high sensitivity" (The Highly Sensitive Person), states that this is a personality trait that occurs in 15% to 20% of the population. Although HSCs tend to be "empathetic, smart, intuitive, careful and conscientious," they are also easily overstimulated and require informed parenting in order to prevent temper tantrums, stress illnesses and the avoidance of pleasurable group activities. Aron offers helpful advice that will assist both nonsensitive and highly sensitive parents through all stages of their child's development from infancy to adolescence. For example, since HSCs have great difficulty with change, it is necessary to prepare them gently so that they do not feel powerless during transitions. According to the author, there are four basic strategies that will help an HSC to become a happy adult: parents should foster their child's self-esteem, try to reduce the feelings of shame HSCs may develop because they are different, employ only mild positive discipline and learn how to talk positively to teachers and friends about their HSC so that interactions will be productive.
Copyright 2002 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Review

"To have an exceptional child you must be willing to have an exceptional child. You have one. And this book will teach you how to raise him to be not only exeptional, but healthy, loving, well-adjusted, and happy." Elaine N. Aron, Ph.D. Praise for The Highly Sensitive Person: 'This remarkable book speaks clearly to highly sensitive people. It gives a fresh perspective, a sigh of relief, and a good sense of where we belong in society.' JOHN GRAY, author of Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 352 pages
• Publisher: Three Rivers Press; 1 edition (October 8, 2002)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0767908724
• ISBN-13: 978-0767908726
• Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.9 x 8.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (39 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #3,264 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #14 in Books > Parenting & Relationships > Special Needs

More About the Author

Elaine Aron, Ph.D., is recognized internationally as one of the leading scientists studying the psychology of love and close relationships. Dr. Aron's research on love, conducted with her husband, Dr. Art Aron, has been featured in the New York Times, Time, and National Geographic. She is the author of The Highly Sensitive Person, The Highly Sensitive Person in Love, and The Highly Sensitive Child. She has lived in many places all over North America, from a geodesic dome on Cortes Island to an aging southern mansion on Peachtree Street in Atlanta, and now divides her time between New York and San Francisco.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

113 of 114 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars a comfort and a relief, November 20, 2002

By A Customer

This review is from: The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them (Paperback)

It was wonderful to read this book. For seven years I've been looking for someone to understand when I talk about my daughter's agony over the seams in her socks, her inability to eat in Italian restaurants because of the strong smell, her discomfort with the volume of sound in movies or the way she always gets homesick (literally ill) if we go on a vacation that lasts more than a couple of days. As someone who never thought twice about any of those things, I appreciate Aron's insights and her suggestions about parenting someone who is so easily overwhelmed. I originally got the book from the library but had to buy my own copy because there was something I wanted ot underline or make a note to remember on almost every page.

50 of 51 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars My child is NOT "strange"!!, July 16, 2003

By A Customer

This review is from: The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them (Paperback)

For five years I have been trying to describe my son to his teachers, other parents, and even to our family. I've struggled with words like, "shy," "quiet," "introverted," "cognitive," and -- the worst one -- "a bit of a loner." None of these captured him. Others have called him "unique," "gentle," "an intellect," "not a joiner." I was insulted by all these labels. But Aron's book finally gave me the right words! My son is an HSC --simple as that. And this book helped me understand this as a wonderful thing, requiring some understanding and accomodations. Aron provides some great suggestions for helping your HSC, and helps parents discover ways to advocate for their HSC in the schools. After reading this book, I bought a copy for my son's teacher and highlighted the relevant sections. She told me this morning that it "shed new light on a perplexing situation." She understands. As a clinical psychologist and as a mother, I highly recommend this book. If nothing else, it will help you and your child "normalize" your experiences. Why only 4 stars? The only downfall of this book is that Aron back-pedals too much. She too often describes the exceptions to every rule, and at times you might feel that she is unsure of her own definitions. But, ultimately, if this is your child, you will recognize him/her right away. And the suggestions in this book will help.

41 of 43 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Enriching, May 13, 2004

By 

"uprise" (Arlington, VA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them (Paperback)

I purchased this book, hoping to learn more about my 8-year old child's behavior traits so that I could commingle our characteristics and avoid damaging his spirit when I criticize or discipline-not to pamper but to nurture. This book did just that, plus more. The Highly Sensitive Child : Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them is a very good read. It provides a lot of information about how highly-sensitive people react to certain stimuli and suggestions for different situations. It's educational and entertaining and the author's prose is straightforward. I selected this book from the many others on similar topics simply because the title hit home. It struck a cord and I knew this was it. I was right.

Not only was I reading about my child, I discovered that I am an HSP as well. I was not aware of the term "highly sensitive" until now. I plan to read more on the subject and keep this book around for my child to use later on in life. I now feel that we are in a win-win position for the long term.

Thank you, Dr. Elaine Aron, for writing this book and for sharing your personal experience on this subject.