Customer Reviews

In His Sights: A True Story of Love and Obsession

5 star:		(11)
4 star:		(9)
3 star:		(4)
2 star:		(5)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

Stalk, stalking, stalker - all frightening words. They are words that we see in newspapers, online, or in books. Fortunately for most of us those words are not applicable to our lives, yet we do know that millions of women are terrorized by stalkers. Frequently these women are too frightened to speak out. Not so for Kate Brennan who has been the victim of a stalker for some 13 years. Choosing to write pseudonymously in order to protect those close to her, Kate recounts years of emotional turmoil, fear, aggravation, and anything but a normal life.

Those years have also been a time of growing self-awareness as she remembers growing up in an alcoholic family and the fact that she has always been attracted by slightly out of sync, controlling men. She wonders how she could have loved and once trusted a man capable of such fearful acts. Kate believes that the answer is "...that life with my family had left me with such a high tolerance for cruelty I couldn't recognize perversion when I saw it." Then, as she notes, when she did see it she still thought that sick people could be well, that enough love and understanding might heal. She learned how very wrong she was.

Kate first met Paul at a party in the home of friends. A writer and Bronte scholar, she went alone, comfortable with herself as a 41-year-old single woman. Paul was attractive, a charmer, and independently wealthy. He was a photographer, and the two shared a love of travel. He pursued her and despite past poor luck at romance Kate moved in with him.

However, Paul was not at all what he seemed to be. It wasn't too long before he began having affairs, there were signs of illegal dealings, his once congenial facade changed dramatically. Kate moved out. She thought this was easily done - just walk away. She learned differently. "You can do all the psychic and physical separation you want, but there's no getting away from someone who wants to remind you he can mess with your life anytime he wants." Paul has the resources to do just that, and she now realizes it will not be over as long as he lives.

She has moved repeatedly, still her phone goes dead because her account has been canceled. Small things are moved from place to place in her apartment, people are hired to intimidate her. When she goes to a movie, she first locates the exit then sits in the back row so she can keep an eye on the audience. There is nothing the police can do because there is no solid evidence against Paul.

One wonders how she has been able to maintain her sanity through all of this. Kate's story is a chilling one, even more terrifying because it is true.

- Gail Cooke

Kate Brennan's, "In His Sights" is a terrifying account of her experience of being stalked by a man purporting to love her. Kate's skills as a writer bring her history to life. Kate's use of language, visual imagery and succinct style meant that I struggled to put the book down. At times, the biography chilled me to the bone, at others, her obvious strength and determination to stay sane had me cheering her on. Kate failed to recognize that she was being stalked for almost two years. As she described dismissing minor and major harassment, I felt like screaming at her to call the police. If this book helps one woman recognize her danger and to ask for help, then Kate's effort will have been worth it. Thank-you Kate for sharing your story, stay sane and stay safe.

The author does an excellent job of conveying the fear with which she lives every day. As I read her memoir, I acutely felt her sense of helplessness and realized that a life can be destroyed by the most subtle, and yet insidious, actions.
Ms. Brennan has shown great courage in sharing her story and it is a one that will make any woman think twice about pursuing a relationship with a controlling man.

I stayed up very late reading, because I couldn't put this book down! I wanted to find out what happened next. What a horrifying situation. I was particularly fascinated by her friends' reactions, especially those who betrayed her. Kate, I hope you are safe, and I pray that someday soon you'll have peace and security.

One of my clients recommended this book to me, stating that it is similar to what she is going through. Many therapists dismiss claims made by stalking victims, thinking that what they are reporting is not accurate. Kate Brennan provides details on her stalker, who, with his unlimited resources, makes her life miserable and fills her with fear. This book shows the desperation of stalkers and the extreme measures they will go to. Read it and believe it. My client is going through similar experiences. This book is also an excellent choice for men and women who have concerns or doubts about their own partners (yes, men get stalked too).

I am surprised by the anger this book generated in a recent review. I, too, read the book. It was clear the experience was fully documented as accurate. Although documenting subtle and mind-playing games must be difficult, it was apparent that the authorities saw it as real and recognized the potential for great danger and harm. I applaud the effort and courage this author extended to validate her own experience and the experiences of others who feel helpless and victimized.

Usually I sit right down to write the review after I've finished a book. I couldn't do that with In His Sights. The emotion of it was too raw and the implications too dire. I had to allow the book to `sink in' somewhat, before putting my thoughts down on paper.

The book is subtitled "A True Story of Love and Obsession" and that line alone describes the entire book. Kate was a completely ordinary person until she started dating Paul, the millionaire. In the bright lights of hindsight, the warning bells should have started ringing almost from day one, but Kate grew up with an alcoholic and abusive father, and was therefore more willing to forgive and look past things that others would perhaps have balked at.

However, eventually it became too much, even for her, and she decided to leave Paul. But Paul wouldn't allow that-in the past, it had always been he who'd left his girlfriends, and not the other way around, and that was the way it ought to stay. So in an attempt to rewrite history, he started stalking her. At first just by himself, but as time went by, he used his vast fortune to hire others to do his dirty work for him. Kate contacted the appropriate authorities, but nothing she did got him to stop for more than a couple of months at a time.

At the end of the book, Kate is still `on the run'-moving every couple of months, to get away from his harassment.

I was appalled to read how some people brushed Kate's experiences off with a "He must love you very much." No wonder so few stalkers are actually convicted. This isn't about love; it's about control.

In His Sights is a no-nonsense and un-sensationalized account of one person's experience with a dedicated stalker, and as such should be required reading-for women to hopefully learn to see the warning signs early enough and take appropriate action; for men to know how to react if somebody they know are pursued by a stalker.

Armchair Interviews agrees.

I ordered this book immediately after seeing it advertised in a newspaper and read it almost straight through once I got it. I'm very sad for this author who has to be so aware & methodical in her daily doings and living. I also greatly admire her strength and tenacity in being in "control" of her own life while also being Mindful of how quickly the rug can be pulled out from under her. An amazing lady for sure!!

I can only imagine all that the author was not able to include in her account of her relationship with the ex boyfriend. I am thankful to her for writing her story.

I enjoyed the authors "voice" and her ability to give back ground information while keeping pace with the story.

Finaly, I understand minimalizim and the color beige with splashes of colors. She had me laughing out loud when she described her decorating scheme since I do the same exact thing. She speaks for many. Thank you Kate.

I actually started reading this over a year ago and couldn't get into it after the first few chapters. Then after finishing all the books in my house, one night I was desperate for a new read and decided to try again with this book. I'm glad I did. I stayed up late reading because I wanted to find out what happened next. She does an excellent job of conveying the fear in which she lives every day, and what a horrifying situation she suddenly found herself in. I felt her sense of helplessness and can't imagine that a life can be so destroyed and toyed with by someone else. What makes it even worse is that he continues to do it to this day, while not breaking any laws.