Hold the Cream Cheese, Kill the Lox: A Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife Mystery (Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife Mysteries) [Hardcover]

Sharon Kahn (Author)

Book Description

Series: Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife Mysteries | Publication Date: September 17, 2002

Acclaimed mystery writer Sharon Kahn returns with a flavorful new crime novel set in that most unlikely of Jewish population centers, Eternal, Texas.

Ruby knows she's in for trouble when her longtime nemesis, Essie Sue, talks her into housing Essie Sue's twin cousins, Lester and Larry. The boys are in town for pre-Bar Mitzvah schooling from Rabbi Kevin Kapstein. They will be no trouble, says Essie Sue. Famous last words.

Ruby, a rabbi's widow, has never felt much sympathy for Rabbi Kevin, but that's about to change. They now have something in common: their determination to survive Lester and Larry. Whoever coined the phrase "the terrible twos" didn't know Lester and Larry, "the terrible twelves."

Kevin will teach; Ruby will house; and Essie Sue, ever the hostess, will orchestrate the grandest Bar Mitzvah feast in Temple Rita's history. And the star attraction -- besides Essie Sue, of course -- is sure to be Herman Guenther, master lox cutter, who recently moved to town from New Jersey.

But when Herman meets an untimely demise from his own slicing knife, Essie Sue's plans seem all but ruined. Not to mention Herman's. Something's strange about this murder, as Ruby is quick to discover.

Tracing the victim's roots back to Nazi-era Denmark, Ruby soon puts the lox on the platter in a chase that takes her from Eternal to Alaska to New York. She asks some poignant questions along the way and hears some shocking answers.

Sharon Kahn's witty Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife Mysteries have universal appeal, as they make us laugh at ourselves even as we watch Ruby unravel the puzzles of life. With both humor and insight, Kahn proves once again that she's at the top of her form.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Although they lack the complex and suspenseful plotting of Harry Kemelman's rabbinical mysteries, Agatha-nominee Sharon Kahn's "kosher kozies" have a charm all their own, as shown in this fourth installment, Hold the Cream Cheese, Kill the Lox: A Ruby the Rabbi's Wife Mystery. Investigating the stabbing death of Herman Guenther, a quiet old lox cutter, takes Ruby and friends from her home in Eternal, Tex., to Alaska and New Jersey before she deduces a murder motive that goes back to Nazi-occupied Denmark. The antics of self-centered Essie Sue Margolis, who's fussing over the impending bar mitzvah of her obnoxious twin cousins, provide plenty of comic relief.
Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information, Inc.

From Booklist

Ruby, the (late) rabbi's wife (Fax Me a Bagel, Never Nosh a Matzo Ball, Don't Cry for Me, Hot Pastrami), has her hands full when the manipulative Essie Sue involves her in planning a Bar Mitzvah for her twin cousins, the "Lovable Leevees." The boys are, in fact, holy terrors who have never been to Hebrew school. When the retired lox cutter who was to help with catering the affair is killed with his own slicing knife, Ruby helps trace the crime back to his past in Denmark during the Nazi occupation. This involves travel to Seattle and Alaska with her e-mail pal Nan as well as help from would-be suitors reporter Ed and police lieutenant Paul Lundy. Although the characters in this series drift toward the stereotypical, the madcap plots are always entertaining. Readers who enjoy the antics of small-town life will be amused. Barbara Bibel
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 304 pages
• Publisher: Scribner (September 17, 2002)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0684871564
• ISBN-13: 978-0684871561
• Product Dimensions: 8.7 x 5.8 x 1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 15.5 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 3.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,417,158 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Amusing cozy, September 17, 2002

By 

Harriet Klausner - See all my reviews
(#1 Hall OF FAME REVIEWER)    (TOP 1000 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Hold the Cream Cheese, Kill the Lox: A Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife Mystery (Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife Mysteries) (Hardcover)

In Eternal, Texas, Essie Sue Margolis persuades Ruby, the widow of the former rabbi, and the current rabbi Kevin Kapstein to host a Bar Mitzvah at Temple Rita for her two "lovable" third cousins, Larry and Lester Levee. Very quickly, Ruby and company find the two "terrible twelve" year olds to be monsters of the first order. However, with Essie masterminding the ceremony, the Bar Mitzvah should prove to be the social event of the season for the small congregation. To add luster, lox cutter grandmaster Herman Guenther will perform his miracle dicing and slicing.

Herman fails to show up at a meeting with Essie and Ruby so the two ladies journey to his home only to find the grandmaster murdered. While Essie bemoans the impact on the twin's Bar Mitzvah, Ruby investigates by back trailing where Herman has been to include Alaska and New Jersey. Ruby finds herself up to her gefilte fish in a lox conspiracy that dates back to the Nazi occupation of Denmark.

HOLD THE CREAM CHEESE, KILL THE LOX is an amusing cozy that provides the audience insight into pre-Bar Mitzvah training. The story line is humorous because of the actions of Essie groaning over the murder's impact on the Bar Mitzvah and the havoc caused by the non-mench twins. Though why Ruby and Essie gallivant to Alaska and New Jersey to solve the homicide seems weak, the motivation for murder is fun to follow. Sharon Kahn serves up a taste of Jewish American life with a few kibbutz to nosh on inside a cozy that is clearly not chopped liver.

Harriet Klausner

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

1.0 out of 5 stars Easily the worst mystery I have EVER read, November 14, 2004

By 

Elizabeth B. Daykin "eabone" (Portland, Oregon) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Hold the Cream Cheese, Kill the Lox: A Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife Mystery (Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife Mysteries) (Hardcover)

First of all, this book barely qualifies for the mystery genre. If anything, it is more a travelogue of Alaska. While interesting, not what I thought I was buying. This Alaska trip takes up the majority of the book and has only, possibly, 2 pages total that relate the purported story line of a murdered man.

Overall, the book contains maybe, maybe 30 pages of mystery. Our "detective" isn't even a detective since she doesn't solve the murder. Urg. The ending makes absolutely no logical sense, even in the world of cozies where characters are "quirky."

Contrary to what another reviewer wrote, it offers ZERO insight into the process of preparing to become a bar/bat mitzvah. There is only one training activity profiled and is certainly not representative of the training for this event.

I cannot adequately express how deeply I believe you should not buy this book.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Ruby Rules!, April 6, 2003

By 

Judith Lindenau "dulcie22" (Traverse City, MI USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Hold the Cream Cheese, Kill the Lox: A Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife Mystery (Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife Mysteries) (Hardcover)

Kahn's 'Ruby, the Rabbi's Wife'(well, widow) series is a delight! All four mysteries are vehicles for Kahn's wicked sense of humor and sharp descriptions of the Jewish community, and they are plotted simply and entertainingly. In "Kill the Lox", Essie Sue (the Jewish princess)is planning a bar mitzvah for the terrorist twins. Kevin Kapstein, the fumbling and pompous rabbi, stumbles through the plot as well, lurching along behind Essie Sue as they plan the largest celebration Eternal, Texas has ever seen in the Temple Rita.

Plans go astray when Herman, the master lox cutter, is found sliced by his own knife, and Ruby is off on another mystery--one which takes her to Alaska and to New York. She solves the crime--actually, two crimes--with the help of the two men in her love life and her best friend and e-mail correspondent, Nan.

It's all much fun and entertainment. I do hope Sharon Kahn is hard at work on the next installment in this series!