Customer Reviews

Holding On to the Air: An Autobiography

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Suzanne Farrell was often regarded as Balanchine's ultimate "muse", although she was neither the first nor really the last. Balanchine in the 1960s became obsessed with this willowy, mysterious dancer, and choreographed many ballets for her. Their personal relationship was much gossiped about. But Balanchine was married (to another "muse", Tanaquiel le Clerg), and Farrell was a staunch Catholic. Eventually, she married another dancer, and left the New York City Ballet. When she returned 5 years later, Balanchine's personal obsession was over. They worked professionally till his death but it seems as if Balanchine never became emotionally invested in her again. Farrell for her part loftily insists that the relationship was consummated through "dance" and not the traditional way. One wonders if it was this remoteness and unattainability that made Balanchine so hurt when Farrell married and left the company.
Farrell's book is a moving personal story, and I'm too young to have seen her dance but surviving videoclips make it easy to understand Balanchine's obsession. She was indeed a beautiful, electrifying dancer. However, like a lot of singer autobiographies, Farrell can't help but sound a bit self-centered. She was isolated at the NYCB due to resentment from the other dancers, but it seems impossible that she'd remain so completely oblivious to the company's other members. Thus, 1960s mainstays of the NYCB like Edward Villela, Patricia McBride, Karin von Arnoldigen, that all figure so prominently in any chronology of the NYCB, are completely absent in Farrells story. From someone reading her book you'd think Balanchine choreographed solely for her, that she was the only important ballerina in his life, and that the company essentially revolved around her. This is not a criticism, but it's something to keep in mind when reading the book. I'd suggest also getting a biography of Balanchine, to keep this in perspective.
To Farrell's credit, she never self-aggrandizes or vilifies anyone. She admits Balanchine could be selfish and smothering, but overall she treats him very sensitively. She is also fair about her mother, a typical stage-mom. Overall, this is one of the best autobiographies of a dacner that I've read. Its candid and personal. However, like most autobiographies I wouldnt read it as an entirely accurate history of ballet either.
As an interesting footnote, Farrell's frequent stage partner and new NYCB dancermaster Peter Martins fired Farrell from teaching at the NYCB after a blowup in the late 1990s. In a preview of the book Farrell mentions the firing.
Farrell's co-writer was Toni Bentley, who's also written a fascinating personal account of being a NYCB dancer.

A must read for ballet lovers, Holding on the Air is beautifully and honestly written by Suzanne Farrell, legendary ballerina of the New York City Ballet. The reader is taken from Miss Farrell's early days as Suzanne "Ficker," ballet student, to Suzanne Farrell, ballet star. She writes about her early hardship at NYCB, her marriage, her fame, and her somewhat loving and complicated relationship with choreographer and ballet master George Balanchine. Balanchine once told Farrell to think of "holding on to the air" in order to do a particular balance. For me, the title of her book signifies her holding on to the air that gave her dancing life. It signifies holding on to memories, holding on to her artistry, and for using her air to inspire so many younger dancers. Truly a candid and telling story of America's premiere ballerina.

After reading (or, in my case, rereading) Suzanne Farrell's wonderful book, one feels a tremendous debt of gratitude. It isn't just that her life and views on dance and art are fascinating, though that is certainly true. It's the tremendous sense of generosity and compassion that flow from these pages. I remember when I first read her mother's words to her young daughters, that if they had "the arts in their life they would never be lonely", that I quietly marked the page, closed the book, and wept appreciatively. This was the first time I had heard these words expressed by anyone and it confirmed the feelings I've had since being very young.
Many may find the Balanchine references the definitive biography of this section of his life, but there is so much more to this glorious volume, gratefully back in print from the University of Florida. This paperback edition is very well-bound, pages are highest quality; the price may seem a tad high, but is in truth worth more than pricier hardcovers. This, along with the DVD of Farrell's exquisite "Elusive Muse" documentary make an outstanding gift idea for young people uncertain of how to attain their dreams. Ms. Farrell's life is certainly a great inspiration.

I stumbled across this book by accident almost a year ago and have been touched by it ever since. I'm not sure that I can explain the specialness of this of this story but it feels like a real life fairy tale. You can feel Ms. Farrell's emotions and passion of what it must have been like for her to work with her teacher, George Balanchine. What a dynamic duo they must have been together. I would recommend this book to everyone, whether you have been exposed to ballet or not, as a special glimpse into a very public but very private life. Truly a lovely story.

I thoroughly enjoyed reading about the life of this incredible Balanchine ballerina. The story was so touching and I cried several times. It is a must for any dancer or anyone with dreams.

i read this book as a young adult, when i was entrenched in the rigours of technique and training and it inspired me in many ways. from farrel's honesty and dedication to her art to the descriptions of balanchine as both a person and an artist. i love this book and i highly recomend it.

Farrell had a rather dramatic climb into the spotlight so this is not the book to learn how a young dancer makes her way up through the ranks. It's also a little I-danced-this-then-I-danced-that, which makes it hard to remember important roles early in her career. That being said, she is a brilliant dancer, with an unusual career and the truest sense of Balanchine's choreography. If you're interested in Balanchine, American Ballet or the New York City Ballet, this is a must.

First, I have the 1990 version of her autobiography. While it is interested, a lot has happened to Suzanne Farrell since 1990. She was awarded the National Medal of the Arts and inducted as one of the five Kennedy Center Honors in Washington D.C. Suzanne Farrell is a classically trained ballerina who has become a force in American ballet. Her relationship with George Ballanchine is fascinating. She was one of his beloved muses.

At 15 years old, she moved with her divorced mother and sister to New York City to attend the prestigious ballet school founded by George Ballanchine. Her life would never be the same. While reading her autobiography, I found her intriguing and likable and approachable. She's not famous enough to be mobbed unless you are in the ballet world.

Even then, Suzanne Farrell is quite generous and kind to her svengali, George Balanchine. They had an unusual relationship. She probably considered him more as the surrogate father figure than a possible lover. George was not only enamored with the youthful Suzanne but quite possessive of her. The relationship between George and Suzanne is both fascinating and disturbing maybe because of the age difference or his five marriages. Suzanne was a bit naive but she was capable of knowing George's feelings towards her than the other dancers in the company. Still it's quite a powerful read and Suzanne's rebellion and independence is quite interesting particularly her relationship with George or Mr. B. as she refers him in the book.

No matter what happened in this complex relationship, she is rather a kind individual with a generous heart and soul and a conscience. Her relationship with George was complicated, let's just leave it to that.

This book is also a dance history book of the ballet rise in America as well. Suzanne Farrell chronicles the difficulties of being a ballerina even one of the most successful. She's not drowning in money. Rather, she lives a lot more modestly. Of dance, ballet is a passionate career filled with sacrifices, pain, stress, and competition. Ballerinas like Suzanne must always look the part. Of course, the dances have choreographed moves like actors learning Shakespearean lines in iambic pentameter. She writes about the being a dancer in today's world.

I went to the ballet at Lincoln Center months ago and how many people go to the ballet, opera, or symphony. Not many as they would like to fit those seats. Ballet is the source of many great Russian figure skaters and even Torvill and Dean. The ballet is to dance like Shakespeare to theatre and opera to music.

I worry about the future of ballet, opera, and theatre in our society. We seem to have lost a greater need to be entertained in our theatres. In fact, we are losing in the arts world. The arts world can't compete with today's technology but we don't need it too. We need to have the ballet, opera, and theatre to be both entertained and enlightened in our lives.

If you know Suzanne Farrell you will love and respect the lady even more after reading this book. Many artists can relate with her experiences and feelings. I'm sure anyone who was in the arts in college knew of someone who had this type of relationship with their teacher.
Honesty and truth abounds in this volume. Ms. Farrell has an accurate memory of the past. We have proof of that in her restoration project of Balanchine "lost" ballets. She is putting together choreography that she danced in her early twenties.
A remarkable lady!

I am taken by the dignity, passion, pragmaticism and faith that imbue(d) Suzanne Farrell and Geroge Balanchine's lives. This was a truly amazing book! I give it my strongest recommendation.