Customer Reviews

Honest, Direct, Respectful: Three Simple Words that will Change your Life

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Reviewed by Regan Windsor for Reader Views (6/07)

Is your communication style effective? Do you communicate in a way that is Honest Direct and Respectful? "Honest Direct Respectful: Three Simple Words That Will Change Your Life" is a small book that packs a big punch. Providing an analysis of the passive - reactive communication continuum, Dennis D. Adams guides the reader through an analysis of their communication style and the implications that their style may have on the many facets of their life.

The book begins with a description of both passive (quiet and reticent/ unresponsive) and reactive (loud and aggressive or demanding and "in your face") and provides examples of how people on the passive and reactive sides of the continuum think. It then follows with a short quiz to test where on the continuum your communication style lies.

Adams then provides examples from his own experience, and the experience of others, to further define passive versus reactive communicators. If you see yourself in both the passive and reactive styles it's possible you're a TOP - Ticked-Off Passive. This occurs when people are passive so long, they are now angry at the world and react in a reactive way, but then feel bad about it (a reaction true reactive types do not experience).

The most effective communication style exists in the middle of the continuum, where communication is not confrontational, and it is not avoidance. It is truthful and it is executed in an Honest Direct Respectful manner.

"Honest Direct Respectful" provides a simple and effective model for successful communication. The ability to communicate effectively has vast implications on your success both personally and professionally. I would highly recommend this resource book for everyone; even those that are not extreme passive or reactive communicators will find value in the suggestions in this book.

Received book free of charge.

The principles in this book could solve most of the problems we face in business and relationships. Read it, apply it, and marvel at the results. It's amazing how effective our communication can be when it's honest, direct and respectful.

This little book is a quick read and helpful for communicating clearly. The best part was the survey that helps you identify your personal style of communicating. Awareness first. The premise of the author's message is right on, but for those of us who struggle, more examples and scenarios would have been helpful.

Thank you for sharing your wisdom through this book. I often wondered about that gap between passive and reactive and how one finds a comfortable medium. There are also implications on cross cultural communication. As the oldest child of two in an Asian family, the words "no" and "I, me, and mine" were hardly uttered in our household. The expectation is to say yes, watch for everyone's needs before our own--and we better be happy doing it! It's amazing how these learned behaviors find themselves into the workplace. As an adult, saying no can still be difficult but I'm learning to do so honestly, directly and respectfully. Your book has been an epiphany. Thank you.

You will probably guess by my last name that I am related to the author. As a matter of fact, I am his brother. I am also a pastor on the coast of Oregon and I am offering an honest opinion of the book.

Dennis has hit the nail on the head. This concept, in it's simplicity, is amazing in it's scope. You can use this in every area of your life and the results are the same. IT WORKS !! As I communicate with people every day on many different levels, I have found that by following these three simple words, I can always walk away knowing I have communicated clearly.

I will take this one more level. As I spend time communicating with my God, I find that this type of communication is what He desires. There is no profit in playing games with God. Being honest, direct and respectful clears the way for a much stronger relationship.

Keep up the great work Dennis. I know this book will change alot of lives.

Marty Adams
Pator of Worship and Fine Arts
Florence Christian Church

As a teacher, and as a wife, I found the skills in this book to be invaluable. It helped me identify my strengths and my weaknessness in my communication with others in a very safe, insightful way. As a result, I have been able to refine those areas that needed work, and I have enjoyed the results! I know others have too!

I found this book to be a great insight. It made me stop and take a hard look at myself, and has change the way I deal with people.

I really liked this book. A friend loaned it to me (so the price was right, although for $12 the price was still right). I read easily, every word counted and I put it down with some new ideas. Pretty much what I like in a book.