Honey Don't [Hardcover]

Tim Sandlin (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: May 22, 2003

A novel that skewers the inanities of our age, with results that are outrageous, wildly funny, and utterly subversive. It's Sandlin at his most maverick best.

Set in the very near future, Honey Don't features a hit list that runs the gamut: from a goatish President dying in flagrante, to an aging Don appalled by modern manners; from a certifiably stupid mafia bagman fleeing both the Secret Service and the mob with $656,000 of dirty money in a locked attaché case and the President's head in a carry-all, to a coke-snorting, blow-dried VP who has suddenly caught the brass ring. Circling them are conniving White House staffers, corrupt politicos, sleazy journalists, and rancid pro-football coaches-all adding up to a DC three-ring circus.

And in the center ring is the eponymous Honey, one of those Texas women cursed with a given name that condemns her to a lifetime of cheerleadering. But this daddy's little girl is a free spirit in full rebellion, and her take on life-offbeat but on target-is the heart and soul of this antic tale. And, as always with Sandlin, it's the women who have the last laugh.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

When reading Tim Sandlin's Honey Don't, one is tempted to make comparisons to other writers of very funny books: Carl Hiaasen, Tom Robbins, Kinky Friedman, and Robert Ferrigno, for starters. But after consideration, the conclusion is that Sandlin is strictly sui generis. Nobody else is quite as over-the-top as Sandlin. His Gro Vont Trilogy, set in Wyoming, introduced readers to a motley group of free spirits, but this one has them all beat.

RC Nash, a journalist returning from a bungled European assignment, and Jimmy Sebastiano, a small-time Mafia bagman who is carrying $656K for delivery to his boss, improbably share a cab from Dulles to downtown D.C. RC gets home to find his girlfriend gone and his entire wardrobe cut into bite-size pieces; Jimmy surprises his girlfriend, the eponymous Honey, in flagrante delicto with someone who looks vaguely familiar. Turns out it's the President who, in his haste to leave, trips on his shorts, hits his head and dies. What to do with the body of the President? Enter Secret Service men; a gay Washington Redskins third-stringer' a Mafia don whose name is Rat's Ass and his savvy grandson; a coke-snorting VP; a First Lady who used to be a jazzercise instructor; the C.I.A., F.B.I. and a few walk-ons from the local Damien's Donuts.

At times, there are too many sub-plots in motion to keep track of the action, but Sandlin takes on every sacred cow in existence: ethnicity, gender, politics, sexual conduct, self-serving greed, and hypocrisy--and shatters them one by one. For a refreshing vacation from political correctness and a few good belly laughs, Honey Don't is a good choice. --Valerie Ryan

From Publishers Weekly

Strongly reminiscent of Carl Hiaasen and Tom Robbins, this sixth satirical novel by the ribald, irreverent Sandlin takes leave of GroVont, Wyo. (setting of Sandlin's GroVont trilogy), to visit a mismatched cast of oddball denizens of Washington, D.C. Returning in the wee hours of the morning from a botched assignment in Europe, Daily News journalist RC Nash shares a cab from Dulles Airport with Jimmy Sebastiano, a dim-witted Mafia bagman couriering $656,000 to his boss, Rat's Ass Olivetti, the godfather of Philadelphia. Jimmy sneaks into his Foggy Bottom pad the back way to avoid two federal agents parked out front and catches his mistress, ex-Texas high school cheerleader Honey DuPont, having sex with the president. The startled president trips on his thong bikini and dies instantly when he strikes his head on an ornamental iron flamingo. Sneaking the corpse out in a beanbag chair, they take it to the house of Honey's ex-high school flame, Farlow Stubbs, a gay Redskins defensive back, and put it in his freezer. Looking to land an interview with Farlow, RC stumbles upon the corpse; meanwhile, Mafia hit men come looking for Jimmy, who still has the mob's money. Wacky subplots feature a pubertal grandson of the Mafia boss who has a crush on Honey; the ex-first lady (a former Jazzercise instructor from Wisconsin); the devious White House chief of staff; the boneheaded v-p (now president); a cadre of assorted Feds; RC's former editor; her lover (an adulterous senator); and a cast of other Washington types caught up in the zany chase. This madcap farce is a surefire bet to have readers laughing out loud.
Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 368 pages
• Publisher: A Marian Wood Book/Putnam; First Edition edition (May 22, 2003)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0399149988
• ISBN-13: 978-0399149986
• Product Dimensions: 8.6 x 5.8 x 1.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds
• Average Customer Review: 3.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (13 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,455,411 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Honey, honey, honey, February 13, 2005

By 

Bill Fitzhugh (Los Angeles) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Honey Don't (Hardcover)

If there's such a thing as a typical Tim Sandlin novel, this probably ain't it. This is funnier in an over-the-top sort of way than his four-book trilogy, which is just plain funny in a Tim Sandlin sort of way. One way to look at this, if you're so inclined, is to consider Honey Don't as Tim's answer to my novel, Heart Seizure wherein I created an unfortunate FBI Agent by the name of Sandlin (in Tim's honor). In Honey Don't, Tim paid me back by creating a Senator Fitzhugh who is, well, lacking in several key personality traits. I think I lied to Tim soon after this came out, told him I read it and loved it. Truth is, I just got around to reading it but I was right about loving it. Honey is a sweetie, check her out.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars Not One Of His Best, March 10, 2007

By 

G. Robertson (janesville, ca United States) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Honey Don't (Mass Market Paperback)

To compare Tim Sandlin with Tom Robbins, as "one dust jacket critic" has, is a bit of a stretch. Nevertheless,I remain a fan, anxious to get my hands on his next offering.

Having said this, Honey Don't was a mild disappointment. As in all Sandlin novels, the prose was entertaining and often humorous, but the book didn't seem to reach the levels of keen social awareness and psychological insight that we've seen in this fine writer's previous efforts, most notably The GroVont Trilogy.

I don't mean to dog this book. If you're a Sandlin fan as I am, by all means read this book. Just don't expect too much.

3 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars You'll never look at political figures the same way again, July 1, 2003

By 

gtigrl "gtigrl" (New York) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Honey Don't (Hardcover)

It's been years since I've read any of Tim Sandlin's books (and I've read every single one of them )...so I can't compare Honey Don't to his prior works. BUT I can say I really enjoyed Honey Don't. It took a little while for me to get into it but once I did, I found myself intrigued by the characters and what happened to them.

I don't want to give the plot away. Let's just say it is a dark comedy about the murder of a very famous man and the way the murderer and his girlfriend and various other characters deal with the situation.

What I liked most about Honey Don't is how Tim incorporated a lot of modern day pop culture into the story...ie: Starbucks and the internet. He didn't flat out make fun of them...but he kinda did in the subtle way he does make fun of every day life.

It's been a long wait for Honey Don't. I hope all fans of Tim Sandlin will read it. I had NO idea what it was about but I bought the hard cover copy anyway. I'm glad I did.