Customer Reviews

The Hooker and the Nun

5 star:		(47)
4 star:		(0)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(4)

 

 

Based on the 50 5-star ratings of this book, I selected it for my book club. I went out on a limb by nominating an erotic novel for a book club, and I thought I could tap into the wisdom of crowds by selecting a well-rated book. What a mistake that turned out to be.

This book is, without a doubt, the most poorly written published novel I have ever read. To put it bluntly: it reads like it is an unedited first draft of a story that has little or no potential for improvement.

Normally I wouldn't come Amazon to pillory a book (in fact, this is the first book review I've ever written for Amazon) but I found the deceptive high-star review scam more than just a little bit offensive, and I feel it is my obligation to attempt to add some 'real' reviews to the existing mix. All of these 5-star reviews, as far as I can tell, were written by the author. Why do I say that? Because each and every one of the 5-star reviews are rife with the exact same horrible spelling, punctuation, peculiar syntax and awkward grammar that permeates the book. In fact, the first review is lifted verbatim from the introduction of the book.

I'd like to go into an actual critique of the "story," but I can't really do that because there isn't one. I suppose, in the loosest sense of the term, yes, there is a story, because there are characters with names (though often misspelled or misidentified) that go to places and do things, but I'm not going to waste time on that because, well, it's an erotic novel. I don't think people who are thinking to buy this book are looking for a story, really, just some plausible setups that can allow for the naughty action parts to proceed. I can say that this book's setups are pretty lame (even when compared to other trashy novels) and again, the quality of the writing is so abysmal that any critique in that area would be a waste of time.

But still, you might be wondering about the sexy parts. First, let me preface this by saying that I am not a prude, and I'm not unfamiliar with the genre. But I really must wonder if the author has ever had sex herself, or has even seen a drawing of a naked person. Her descriptions of sex were not only riddled with odd and off-putting terms, but the grammatical structure of the encounters was so badly assembled that it was frequently difficult to understand what was going on. The descriptions of the sex were not only totally implausible (and not in the way that pornography typically exaggerates things) but they read as though they were written by a person without a clear understanding of the actual mechanics of sex. Many of the readers in my book club had a hard time believing the author was even a woman. I can't answer that question, but I don't think it matters ... a good writer should be able to fool you either way.

In short, if you're looking for a book with the slightest bit of redeeming value, erotic or not, look elsewhere.

One of our book club members picked this book for our book club based on the genre and the great reviews. After even the most cursory glance, suspicion grew among all of us about the book itself as well as the veracity and provenance of these reviews. Thus I've been moved to write a review to counterbalance some of the apparent ballot-box-stuffing going on here.

The Hooker and the Nun is poorly written, riddled with typos and errors, filled with oddly offputting phrasing, and not terribly arousing. Erotica is always a crapshoot given how taste-specific the subject matter can be, but in this case the writer's personal taste and word choice got in the way of any appreciation for the work for me. If you like incredibly, run-like-a-river wet girls or weirdo anachronistic phrases like "the hornies" or "cum-offs", this is for you as the Hooker and the Nun has plenty of the above.

I personally had no need for some of the "racy" parts. Young girls are turned on by the older male and female sexual predators in the convent. The character of Diana seems to be turned on by her mother having sex and uses her mother's sex toys. These types of scenes are woven throughout the book. If that is something you like or don't mind, then be prepared for lots of "dripping honeypots" (all of the "honeypots" "gush", "drip", etc.).

And, as other reviews have noted, there are various typos and what not.
I would give this book 2 1/2 stars because I think it is middle of the road. Not good, not bad if you are into what it details in the book.

This book was terrible! Masturbating with a state of the virgin Mary?? The constant references to the "honey pot" and what's with the old lady in the hospital??

I am so annoyed I wasted money buying both of these books. Also, was this printed in a garage? Many type-o's throughout the book.

This book is a very sensitively written and thought through novel it took talent and knowledge to have portrayed such tender sexual emounters. I love it, its real and as close to the real thing I did change places with some of her characters and felt like I was part of the story, i'll have to admit to being addicted to Eve Locke

Yes i've been waiting for a long time for Eve Locke and the sensual way she portrays love making among females, it is definitly a classic and i'm looking forward to her next book. I've already read this book twice and it's made the rounds of my very close knit group of perverted lovers,both men and women and Eve turns a person on from start to finish. Thank you Eve Locke, i'll be your fan forever.
Thomas P.

This is the book i've been waiting for for my entire life, (41)and now i'm so pleased for having someone (Eve Locke)as my newest love and mentor. She's the best author for my style of sexual fantasies and I hope the world appriciates her talent. I've just bought her second book The lesbian, her virgin and Ocracoke Island and it's just as good. I can now live my wildest obscenities without feeling degraded she's my kind of girl.Her descriptions are exactually what I needed for a 100% better sexlife, never mind having to have a man anymore.
Grace

Eve Locke certaintly knows how to turn a person on, her descriptions are so very touching and real and sensative. I love the way she gets down and dirty, but real and mature. And she has the ability to add the third sexual lifestyle, it's really great, my dreams, and probably many other girls dreams come true.I love her talent for grabbing her readers, (me)by my libido and making it almost impossible to put it down, I read untill I fall asleep or finish myself off. I'm a fan forever.
Charlotte (Charley)

I love it, it tells it like it happens, my kind of story, and I'm going to read everything that she writes. I love the way she describes all of the steamy love scenes, and I find myself changing places with some of her characters. I don't dare to read this book at work because it makes me so horny, and I can't wait to get home to continue being entertained, my girlfriends all love it to, sometimes i read it out loud to them and we try to dupliate some of the very racy situations, god bless Eve Locke.
Eve

I haven't been turned on so fast and for such a long period of time as I was when I first began reading Eve Locke's The Hooker and the Nun, it IS fantasticly raunchy and its descriptive areas are real, I've never felt so close to a sexual situation as when I read and study, believe it or not I really dote on every word, I just can't say enough about this writer and her talented style of giving us what we have been waiting for for such a long time, I love her.