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Hope For the Separated: Wounded Marriages Can Be Healed (Chapman, Gary) Paperback – January 1, 2005

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Editorial Reviews


"Efforts to help marriages in trouble are hard to fault, especially when presented with the good-hearted intentions of an expert like Gary Chapman. His audio is a wise man's overview of how to fix a broken marriage, especially when children are involved. Like his other relationship lessons, this one is grounded in the Christian faith, but it rises above the often trite and smug advice one hears from too many such authors. His voice and message are comforting as his rich baritone conveys his confidence in his ideas. This is a lesson that people of all levels of faith, stress, or disillusionment should hear." 
T.W. © AudioFile Portland, Maine
--This text refers to the Audio CD edition.

From the Back Cover

"Is your marriage worth fighting for?"

If so, this book is for you.

It takes a tremendous amount of strength to overcome skepticism and weariness and begin the work of healing a broken marriage. But just taking a look at this book shows you have the heart of a fighter. In One More Try, Gary Chapman gives you the courage and confidence to move forward when your marriage is falling apart.

One More Try will help you . . .

·         take the next step when blindsided in marriage;

·         discover healthy ways to manage frustration and anger;

·         effectively deal with loneliness;

·         renew hope and trust in your spouse; and

·         rebuild your marriage from the ground up.

The content of this book has been significantly revised and updated from its previous title Hope for the Separated.


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Product Details

  • Series: Chapman, Gary (Book 4)
  • Paperback: 176 pages
  • Publisher: Moody Publishers; New Edition edition (January 1, 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0802436390
  • ISBN-13: 978-0802436399
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.4 x 8.5 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (89 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #54,615 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Married more than 45 years to Karolyn, Dr. Gary Chapman is just the man to turn to for help on improving or healing our most important relationships. His own life experiences, plus over thirty-five years of pastoring and marriage counseling, led him to publish his first book in the Love Language series, The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate. Millions of readers credit this continual New York Times bestseller with saving their marriages by showing them simple and practical ways to communicate their love to their partner.
Since the success of his first book, Dr. Chapman has expanded his Five Love Languages series to specifically reach out to teens, singles, men, and children (co-authored with Dr. Ross Campbell).
He is the author of numerous other books published by Moody Publishers/Northfield Publishing, including The World's Easiest Guide to Family Relationships, Anger, The Family You've Always Wanted, The Marriage You've Always Wanted, Desperate Marriages, God Speaks Your Love Language (Jan 09), Parenting Your Adult Child, and Hope for the Separated. He co-authored The Five Languages of Apology with Dr. Jennifer Thomas.
Chapman speaks to thousands of couples nationwide through his weekend marriage conferences. He hosts a nationally syndicated radio program, Love Language Minute, and a Saturday morning program, Building Relationships with Dr. Gary Chapman, that air on more than 100 stations. Dr. Chapman also serves as senior associate pastor at Calvary Baptist Church in Winston-Salem, North Carolina.
Dr. Chapman holds BA and MA degrees in anthropology from Wheaton College and Wake Forest University, respectively, MRE and PhD degrees from Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, and has completed postgraduate work at the University of North Carolina and Duke University.
Dr. Chapman and his wife have two adult children and two grandchildren, and currently live in Winston-Salem, North Carolina.

Customer Reviews

Very well written and practical.
This book helped me feel hope and know that things can be worked through.
nancy rosa
I have read many books since he left and this is by far the best!

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

94 of 95 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on October 13, 1998
Format: Paperback
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!! This book was so moving, insightful and eye opening that I read it ~three times~ over the course of one weekend. Gary Chapman truly gives you hope when you feel there is none. Its message is that separation can lead to a restored, enriched, growing marriage and the book shows you how. The part that hit home the most with me was that you don't have to be a slave to your past behaviors, you CAN change.
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98 of 101 people found the following review helpful By Amazon Customer on December 20, 2004
Format: Paperback
I read this book thinking that it would have all of the answers for getting him back. In reading it, I realized that getting him back would be pointless.

He has to want to work things out. - It reminded me of Exodus with Moses and Pharoah. Pharoah's heart was hard and he would not let the people of Israel go.

Chapman states that just because something is God's will, He did give human beings free will, so they may decide to go against God's will.

I like how Chapman backs up his books with Scripture. Using the book as a guide, I was able to note some of the faults I'd made in the relationship, and some that I've made since.

I would like to seek reconciliation, but he as to want it to. In the end, he may decide that he would much rather part, and that is something that I'm going to have to accept.

Chapter 6 - Long Distance Love

This chapter takes 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 and breaks it down. Each section of this chapter is one of the characteristics of LOVE from Paul's letter the the people of Corinth. Seeing it broken down makes it much easier to digest.

Chapter 8 - How Do I Handle The Loneliness

Fellowship with others!

Chapter 10 - If Your Spouse Returns

I thought that this sounded a little idealist. Chapman said to call, but I tried email. Either way, he can choose to listen to the voicemail or deleted. With email, he can choose to read it or delete it.

Using the other information that Chapman gives in steps toward reconciliation, I strongly recommend seeing a pastor at your church or a Christian counselor. A non-Christian counselor will be of little benefit if you are working toward a Christ-centered relationship.
Read more ›
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96 of 103 people found the following review helpful By "britgam" on January 21, 2004
Format: Paperback
I bought this book because of the word hope that appears so boldly on the cover. While there are some nuggets of Biblical and practical truths,I can't help but question the simplicity of the adviced shared. Marital separations and crisis are usually the result of many factors. For a once loving spouse to reject the other and totally walk out of the marriage, takes years and layers of problems. The suggestion of this book is to show love to the rejector. Then after showing this love, resolute in your mind that you want to reconcile. Call up the spouse that has hurt you beyond words,betrayed your absolute trust in him and left you to take care of all of life's situations by yourself and ask him for a "healing" dinner date?!?!?
If you want a book that truly gives HOPE and a Biblical gameplan for enduring a separation and restoring a marriage read "Love Must Be Tough" by James Dobson. I refer to it daily and it gives me HOPE and reassurance each time. I also like the fact that it addresses other causes of marital crisis besides extra marital affairs.
If you can totally pinpoint the reason for your separation and that reason is the only factor in the crisis, then this book and the "healing dinner date" will probably be of great encouragement to you. If the reasons lie deeper, seek out a copy of "Love Must Be Tough".
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36 of 39 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on April 23, 2000
Format: Paperback
Our family is experiencing four separated couples at this time. I have never seen any book so much on target! I hope every separated person reads it three or four times--and makes it their constant guide. It is so true & so scriptural it is a beacon of light in our confused culture where marriage is so very hard. There should be very few marriages that would not be transformed by following the advice in this book.
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19 of 19 people found the following review helpful By Austin on November 20, 2012
Format: Paperback
The main problem of my marriage was that I did not know what marriage really meant and what my role was supposed to be in the eyes of God. I never hit my wife, cursed at her, said anything mean to her at all, I don't smoke, drink or do drugs. I am an Active Duty Military member and everyone who knows me says that I am a great father and was a "good-enough" husband. Once I had been woken up, I realized that it is not about being good enough. My wife deserves me to be not only the best husband I could be, but the best father and the best man I could be. Unfortunately, it took a separtation for me to realize this. My wife decided to leave me after 6 1/2 years of marriage and two kids. She has lost her trust in me. Yes, it was my fault but I didn't see it coming. We have been separated for over 5 months now and all I can think about since the separation is getting her back. Although, since our separation, I have been saved, read Love Dare, The Resolution for Men, How to Forgive Ourselves Totally, The 5 Love Languages, and this book; sought out profesionnal counseling to help me change my ways for the better and for someone to talk to; talk to my pastor on a consistant basis; started going to church twice a week, bible study twice a week, and am constantly reading my bible and listening to K-love, I still have doubt that she will take me back. I have done a complete 180 but I realized that I could do everything right and she still may not come back due to her lack of trust in me and the gravity of what I have done. Never the less, I made a choice on the day she told me that she wanted a separation and that was to do whatever I can to change and to get her back.Read more ›
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