Customer Reviews

How to Attract Asian Women

5 star:		(19)
4 star:		(0)
3 star:		(3)
2 star:		(7)
1 star:		(24)

 

 

You be amazed about what you can write about. This book is just nothing but cheap stereotypes. The world is simply too broad and has too many types of people for one single personality to come out. Unlike most asians i'm not going to go onto a Tirade saying "Yeah those Asianphiles they are rejects from White society that's why they have to hit on our women" It's just not an accurate book. This dating guide is like a lot of business books out there. They will give you strategies but no book can ever help you get a date or make money. It's all you and your confidence. This is just as inaccurate and low depth as the Asian men guide to dating white women. Books like this are going to offend people no matter what. If anything this book is more of a joke gift for a friend. It really shouldn't be taken seriously.

The tips in this book work on only one woman - the author, Ming Tan.

Imagine a bar or coffee house in San Francisco frequented only by Asian women. One of the girls starts up a conversation about how, the other day, a white guy approached her and initiated contact by asking her if she speaks English. They all erupt into a cacophony of high-pitched screeches, laughter and angry mutterings. One of the women is seated in front of a computer with Internet access and she is pulling up US Census data and other descriptive statistics on each related topic, as it emerges, in order to lend an air of scientific validity to their personal experiences. Further imagine that someone is recording the entire discussion, along with all the descriptive statistics that were gleaned off the Internet together with the personal stories that were shared that evening. Transcribe the entire recording into a manuscript and you have Ming Tan's "How To Attract Asian Women: An Asian Woman Reveals it ALL."

This book is not without merit, especially if you, like me, knew relatively nothing about Asian culture and Confucian philosophy prior to reading it. For example, did you know that Asian people are offended when Caucasians refer to them as "Orientals?" According to Miss Tan, "Asians are people and Orientals are rugs." Having had no prior experience with Asians or Asian-Americans, I was not aware of that particular faux pas and I did find that type of information, as well as a few other scattered tidbits, very useful. However, if you grew up with Asian-Americans, have worked with them or have some prior knowledge of Asian cultures, then this "How-To" manual will not provide you with enough information to justify your investment of money and time. (I asked a 44 year old friend of mine if she had known about the sensitivity of Asians to the term "Orientals." She stated yes but only because she recently had occasion to work with an Asian who was forever correcting other staff members when they used the wrong term).

Here is a summary of Miss Tan's findings based on a not-so-scientific sampling of her website's participants who completed a variety of surveys.

Asian women, according to Miss Tan, are physically attracted to two broad types of Caucasian men; tall, sandy-haired, blue-eyed men of Irish or English descent and swarthy, muscular men of Mediterranean descent (Italians are mentioned specifically several times throughout her thesis). Asian women are hard-working and pragmatic people and are far better educated than their American counterparts and, consequently, are attracted to and seek out men with the same characteristics. One piece of information I found particularly useful and interesting pertained to how Asian women are attracted to men with advanced degrees from Ivy League Schools (this is specifically mentioned more than a couple of times; a by-product, perhaps, of a caste system that still strongly prevails in China). Miss Tan's advice is that potential male suitors should boldly advertise their credentials in their Internet dating profiles especially if their source of income is derived from the following sources; Doctor, Lawyer, Engineer, Architect, Business Owner, Computer Expert, Military Officer and "old," family money. It would never have occurred to me to advertise the name of my Alma Matta as this would most definitely be considered arrogant by most Caucasian women.

The rest of the advice, particularly in regard to how to treat Asian women, I found to be entirely intuitive and, at times, insulting to the reader. Several pages, having little or nothing to do with Asian women per se, are devoted to the importance of bathing and brushing one's teeth before the date, paying for the first date (while not expecting sex in return, being generally kind and generous and showing deferential respect to the woman's family. It is hard to imagine that any grown, mature and intelligent man would require such advice. Apparently, Miss Tan and her girlfriends have encountered more than their fair share of unkempt jerks and boorish men. This "book" should have been published as a pamphlet or, better yet, as an e-book at a fraction of the price.

For $...the book "Chinese Business Etiquette: A Guide to Protocol, Manners and Culture in the People's Republic of China" by Scott D. Seligman (New York: Warner Books, Inc. 1999. ISBN 0-446-67387-0) is an excellent, far more intelligent, better written and informative discussion of Chinese culture and etiquette than Miss Tan's, occasionally sophomoric and overpriced, guide to Asian dating Do's-and-Don'ts.

I was hoping for something a little more....reassuring. In other words, I was hoping for a book that would reassure me that I didn't need to worry myself stupid about how I looked or how much money I made. Tan seems to think that all men out there can suddenly turn into "professionals", slip into trendy and pricey men's fashions, become instant scholars and intellectuals, and then get all buffed up at the gym in a prohibitively short time---all this so they can be attractive to Asian women. In other words, Tan puts forth the idea that ALL Asian women want is a GQ Model with a Joe Wieder body and at least a Master's Degree in something. Wait a minute....I thought this was what AMERICAN WOMEN WANTED.

Okay, maybe I read the book too quickly, or perhaps I misunderstood the overall gist, but I got the disappointing sense that Ming Tan is telling me that meeting Asian is not quite as easy as I was lead to believe. For example, one thing that pissed me off is that she did not give advice on how to bypass the "Study Obsession" program most Asian women possess---this insatiable drive to do absolutely nothing else but study. What? Don't these people do ANYTHING ELSE? I did ask out a Chinese woman, who blankly told me she was just too busy studying. Yeah...okay...great....now how do I get her to change her mind? Oh, and the advice about how to beat shyness in this book is horrendous. Visualize being confident with an Asian woman? Oh...but, what if I'm not a "PROFESSIONAL" with Jean Claude van Damme's physique and Donald Trump's money? Nothing about getting past THAT little obstacle, huh? THAT'S gonna take a trifle bit more than simple "visualizations".

The book does give some very helpful information on cultural traditions among the various Asian groups, as well as how to behave in a respectful manner towards the woman and her family, should that time come. I don't absolutely HATE this book, but it was a terrific letdown to know that a great deal of the women she interviewed seemed to arrive at a general consensus that Asian women, for the most part, want the men featured on the cover of "Men's Health". Gee, ladies, I can be a pretty fun guy, but I'm a tad limited in regards to the ol' bank account, and I don't like or trust gyms or most gym equipment, which is unsafe and does great damage to muscles and muscle tissue (guys: try Matt Furey's Combat Conditioning instead). Sorry, ladies, but what you meet is what you will get, and if you don't like it, well tough __________ (fill in the blank)!!!!

All you guys out there reading this, read Tan's book with a generous grain of salt, and keep on searching until you find what works.

As an ABC (Australian Born Chinese), if I found out that a guy I was dating was reading this book, I'd dump him in an instant. Why? I'd rather be viewed as an individual than categorized into this exotic, shy, submissive, tea-drinking, rice-making, family-respecting, money-hungry "Asian female". Congratulations on making a quick buck out of perpetuating this stereotype, objectifying Asian females, and playing into Asian fetishists.

My challenge is trying to get people to see BEYOND my race - this book simply thwarts this.

Anyway, this was the funniest thing I've come across in a long-time. Oh, my white boyfriend is calling me from downstairs. He wants me to cook rice for him. I better go, because, after all, I am an Asian female and it is my role on earth to serve men.

I am an asian guy - filipino, actually - and i've been around asian women of various ethnicities all my life: friends, classmates, co-workers, and acquaintances. As I looked through this book at a local bookstore, I couldn't help but laugh at what was written in it. This book is as reliable a source of info as the tabloid newspapers you see while waiting in line at any grocery store. You don't need to follow this book's advice to be successful with asian women.

And besides, what every asian women looks for in a man isn't at all that different from what a women of ANY race looks for in a man...and that is a guy with a nice thick wallet! You don't need to buy this book...it's totally off the mark!

"Asian Americans are everyone's favorite minority but their own." - Reed Ueda.

This is a disgusting, racist premise for all those guys who have "yellow fever", itself an attraction born of a racist premise - that Asian girls are "different". It's even more horrific that it was written by an Asian woman and aimed...well, let's put it this way: It's not aimed at Asian men.

A little disappointed...I had much better luck with the book "How to Attract White Women." However, Ming Tan's book did get me more dates than "How to Attract Insane and Hateful Women Who Very Much Resemble Ann Coulter."

Having lived and worked in Asia for 15 years, China, Hong Kong and Singapore, I can tell you there is no secret to meeting women here. Any idiot with even a minor ability to listen and understand how people interact with one another is different here from the US will get by just fine as far as meeting women - better so than in the US! That said, Asian-American women, in my epxerience, are totally, totally different. Most of them are more Westernized than Asian, so interacting with them the way you would any other American woman usually works fine, in my experience. I also wonder what the author means by "Asian." The continent contains many nationalities (Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Thai, Indonesian, Malay, etc) each as different from one another as Westerners are from them. An patronizing book at best, a dumb white man's guide at worst.

I heard about this book and thought I would read it to see what it said. The bad reviews are right. My girlfriend is Chinese. She would not be my girlfriend if I had listened to this book. I love Chinese culture. And I love to talk about it with her. Ming Tan says not to let the girl know you like their culture. This book should be called How to Attract American Women that Look Asian. I do not love my girlfriend just because she is Chinese, I love her for who she is. A loving, caring person that I can talk too. She has a heart. And sadly I think that is what maybe Ming Tan and the Americanized Asians in this book are lacking....a heart.