How to Be the Jerk Women Love [Paperback]

F.J.Shark (Author)

Product Details

• Paperback: 157 pages
• Publisher: Thunder World Promotions (June 1994)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0964010909
• ISBN-13: 978-0964010901
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 5.9 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (25 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #536,649 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

50 of 51 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars very insightful -- must read for "nice guys", November 15, 2003

By A Customer

This review is from: How to Be the Jerk Women Love (Paperback)

It is very important to note that he is NOT encouraging guys to be jerks. He has simply identified the (positive) qualities that jerks have, which are attractive to women. If you are a real "nice" guy, you must have lots of female friends that keep ending up with jerks, so it is very natural to ask WHY?

He contends that women want guys to be a set of opposites, something like:
1. unpredictable, yet goal-oriented
2. spontaneous, yet plans dates
3. adventurous, yet in control
4. aggressive, yet mellow and cool
5. mysterious, yet their best friend
Are guys like this possible?? Yes, take the example of a (successful) rock musician. He is undpredictable, spontaneous, etc. when on stage, but has his life planned to the exact tour dates in the long run. Which girl hasn't had a crush on a rock-star :) So the key is to be spontaneous and unpredictable in the short term, but goal-oriented and in control in the long run. I believe this is very true, in the long run, women want to be secure with their men, but they want to have FUN in the moment. For me, this paradigm of short time "jerk" long term "nice guy" was new, accurate and very helpful to understanding women.

The second key point made in this book is that nice guys try too hard to please. They are too accepting. Jerks are generally more demanding. And here is the key observation: think about it, what helps you grow more, a someone who pushes you and stretches your abilities, or someone who accepts anything you do? We all remember those teachers who demanded much from us at school. This is why nice guys become boring, they don't cause women to grow. If "nice" guys would just say a harsh word when their lady is late for a date, she wouldn't need to fall for really abusive guys. Also if a woman can get away with treating you badly -- how can she trust you to protect her from being treated badly by others?

The third important advice for nice guys is to focus more on themselves. Jerks are generally passionate about something. They play in a band or have some sport or other hobby. Here he tries to do some Tony Robbins stuff and it's a bit rip-offish, but the basic point is well taken. First put a smile on your own face, then you can make others smile.

All-in-all, this is very insightful for nice guys in their early twenties. Reviewers who complain about this book making guys being jerks have completely misunderstood the concept. This book is not disrespectful towards women. It is not about getting laid. This book is written for nice guys to be more assertive, spontaneous and wild. Unfortunately, most of the real information could be written on a pamphlet. It contains lots of useless rambling. He couldn't make much money on selling a pamphlet now could he? :) Anyway, the information has been helpful to me. But I must admit that I haven't bought the book myself.

18 of 19 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Shark is a genius!, June 22, 2002

By A Customer

This review is from: How to Be the Jerk Women Love (Paperback)

He's the first author I've seen that tells it like it actually is, instead of some fairytale version of how women (and nice guys) wish it would be. It's incredibly refreshing. Don't let the title scare you, it's not about being mean to women. It's about getting a woman's respect and keeping your self-respect too. It's about being a MAN and giving a woman what she really wants (not what she might say she wants). This is a book that needed to be written. I'm a recovering "nice guy" who always tried to prove to women that I was different from those "other guys". I was different alright, they were having success and I wasn't. I finally got tired of watching some other guy walk off with the girl I wanted. If you want to know why you're striking out with women, read this book.

Don't waste you time with any other "success with women" manual (I've read them all), this is THE ONE. Hey Shark, we need a sequel!

6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars A few words from a recovering "Nice Guy"..., November 25, 1998

By A Customer

This review is from: How to Be the Jerk Women Love (Paperback)

I scoffed at the title, but as they say, you can't judge a book by the cover. This book has great information on how to keep from getting trampled in the dating game. Humorous, easy reading - I think this book is definitely worth reading; IF you can find a copy that is!