Customer Reviews

How to Expand Love: Widening the Circle of Loving Relationships

5 star:		(10)
4 star:		(0)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

"When I speak about love and compassion, I do so not as a Buddhist, or as a Tibetan, nor as the Dalai Lama. I do so as one human being speaking with another". With these words, the Dalai Lama opens his recent guide to expanding one's circle of loving relationships through the practice of love and compassion. This book is simply and eloquently written, and its teachings are wise. The Dalai Lama points out that human beings are essentially alike when superficial differences are pealed away. In addition, all religions are essentially alike to the extent they teach love, kindness, and peace and "a desire to help their fellow beings." (p.4) The Dalai Lama presents a way of understanding these insights and a means of bringing them into focus in one's life through the practice of lovingkindness. Some of the teachings in this book make use of specifically Buddhist beliefs such as the doctrine of rebirth. But the practices and principles of this book can be used with benefit regardless of whether the reader accepts or doesn't accept rebirth or other specifically Buddhist doctrines.

The Dalai Lama sets forth a process of reflective understanding and meditation in first understanding the nature of love and then learning to practice it. It is an inner-directed teaching in that it looks to the self and to self-understanding rather than to externals -- to things beyond one's control such as wealth or power or to success -- as the key to happiness. Thus, the first part of the Dalai Lama's teaching in this book is directed to an understanding of the basic purity of the human mind. Because the mind is pure, it is possible, for the Dalai Lama, to remove defilements such as hatred, lust, and ignorance. The radiant, empty character of the mind also links all human beings together in terms of establishing a commonality and an ability to love and be loved. It teaches that people ought not to be categorized in that beyond the defilements that plague all of us, we are essentially human with the need to be loved and to be free from suffering. This teaching of the pure, radiant mind ("Buddha nature") possessed by all is the most fundamental and difficult teaching in this book.

The Dalai Lama then presents a series of seven steps to increase one's ability to feel love and compassion for an ever-growing class of people and sentient beings. The process is presented in gradually expanding steps, and the reader can follow the path as it develops. Each step is accompanied by teachings and by suggested meditation practices. these seven steps are 1.creating a positive attitude towards others; 2. recognizing the kindnesses each of us has received; 3. reciprocating the kindness of others; 4. learning to love others (including learning the difference between disinterested love and love based upon attachment, such as physical or sensual desire or upon the receipt of benefits from those close to us); 5. practicing compassion, the desire to have others free from suffering; 6 becoming committed to altruism -- to training one's mind to and working for the welfare of others; and 7. realizing enlightenment in terms of being devoted to the welfare of others.

The teachings in this book are in part guides that everyone can use regardless of his or her religious beliefs, and in part a simple exposition of the bodhisattva path of Mahayana Buddhism. The Dalai Lama makes frequent reference to ancient Indian and Tibetan sources, including the Tibetan "Stages on the Path to Enlightement" (pp 7-8), and the teachings of the great Indian sage, Nagarjuna (pp. 190 -- 197). Each chapter of the book is headed by a short quotation from a Buddhist source that the Dalai Lama amplifies in the teachings that follow.

This book is short and a pleasure to read, but there is no suggestion that the teachings are easy. Work on the mind and on learning to love is a project of years and lives. The Dalai Lama has written an inspiring guide to learning to love.

Robin Friedman

I am not a Buddhist but this book is definitely one of the finest books when one is searching for spiritual wisdom and life's guiding light. No, it is certainly not a religious book and meditations can be practiced outside of Buddhism.

How to Expand Love by Jeffrey Hopkins (from the teaching of Dalai Lama) truly spells out the map/road to see higher consciousness of human beings. The most amazing thing about this book is that it can be perfectly appropriate for someone who just started opening themselves to learn about love and compassion. It can also be a book for someone who has some foundation of spirituality to learn more. It helps ones who want to further expand their heart to give and to receive love and compassion. The meditations practices described in the book is so easy to follow but it takes commitment. It can be a book you speed read once to get the feel of what it is like. But certainly if one wants to use this book as a primary tool in expanding love and compassion, one need to periodically go back and read certain chapters, using certain chapters as the central meditation practice.

Every time I pick up this book to read a chapter, I can just feel my heart is heated and warm, ready to channel love and compassion to friends, family, strangers and people who I sometimes get annoyed and upset. I am sure after re-reading the texts of this book a couple times, his words would just be another spiritual gateway for others learn about compassion.

It is another book to experience, another book for one to taste and to understand. Don't get frustrated when you cannot become the master of love and compassion after one reading. But make a commitment to ourselves we will activate our higher consciousness and awareness of our doings. We will do the very best we can to master love and compassion for human beings and for the nature.

If you are interested in learning from a man, His Holiness the Dalai Lama, who is the embodiment of inner peace, so that you can feel inner peace in your own life, than "How To Expand Love" will clearly and beautifully bring you answers no matter what path you may be on.

There are so many people in pain, attacking others, when they do not know how to recognize the love and goodness they are within. This book will help you to see and expand all of the good that you are, and then you can make a positive inner shift, where inner peace dwells, so that you feel inner peace in your life. You do not have to have any religious or spiritual leanings to learn from this beautiful book. All you need is a mind and heart that really wants to feel the inner peace you may have been searching for. It's a beautiful book with messages that will only uplift you and your life as this is what you deserve.

Barbara Rose, author of Stop Being the String Along: A Relationship Guide to Being THE ONE
Editor, inspire! magazine

Spiritual wisdom of the heart whose root is compassion. The Dalai Lama is so generous in sharing his thought process on why an expansion of love is valuable to everyone. Love heals in a way nothing else can. It is the force that turned around a Jewish zealot who arrested Christians from Saul to Disciple Paul on the road to Damascus, turned a tax collector into a Apostle, and conquered the once pagan Roman Empire into the Holy Sea. Buddhism has grown into popularity in the West as its approach to love concentrates on compassion to such a high extent that there can only be love left in its wake. A brilliant illumination on the nature of love. This book is for Buddhists and non-Buddhists. We are affected by the thoughts we expose ourselves to, in whatever media they appear, do your dharma and karma a universe of good .... and open your heart and head to the Dalai Lama's teachings on expanding love.

Jeffrey Hopkins read this book for the CD's. I found his voice to be pleasant, calm, and not distracting. This made it easy to concentrate on the message of the book.

His Holiness gives advice and exercises to expand our awareness. He urges us to make a total commitment to help all beings. But first we have to understand the close connections between all people. Our goal is to cherish other people as a mother cherishes her child.

The book is well organized and it works! By the time you are finished with the five CD's, you will see your friends and enemies in a new light.

Jesus asked us to love our enemies but has anyone ever given you a workshop on how to do that? That is what this book is. It is simple and direct and provides immediate benefits. Trying this out is a lot of fun and very peaceful. I do Zen practice but do not ignore other voices. This is one voice to listen to!

This book is very practical and very easy to read and outlines the basic principles for practicing peace of mind and loving kindness. This approach is very useful in working with all the competitiveness, conflict and anger in our world today. The book can be read in small bites each day to help work with the principles on a daily basis.

...As sweet and well intentioned as the Dali Lama may be, the methods taught in this book really depend on both a belief in reincarnation (although he says you can get benefit just pretending) and on the ability to visualize very well. This seems to severely limit the usefulness of the methods taught here. Hence three stars.
...Also surprisingly there is no mention of the buddhist philosophy of the illusory nature of a 'permanent separate self' , rather there is an emphasis on the equality of everyone, that paradoxically seems almost communist.
...Thus although one may admire his forgiving the chinese, one probably would not want such a man in charge of a swat team at Columbine high school. Complex moral and ethical issues are avoided. The text really seems most suitable for nuns and monks. Hallucinating that someone shooting kids was your mother in some distant lifetime seems silly.
...If you are into reincarnation, an imaginative vivid visualizer, (and willing to work long and hard with numerous repetitive exercises using these qualities) it is probable that the methods presented in this book will eventually bear some fruit. If these characteristics do not describe you, you will probably be disappointed by this book.
...and you may come to the conclusion that if your aim is what the title purports, that you might be better off, if your time is valuable, simply doing some volunteer work?
...And if one's aim is to understand Buddhism or learn to meditate this is definitely, not the place to start.
...Both vipassana, and breath following techniques lead to the experiences of meditation much more directly, than a long course of intricate visualizations.
...Now there are multiple web sites that have free dharma talks available from many different teachers, in both audio and text format, from both vipassana and theravada angles; as well as lots of information on Advaita Vedanta.
...If you are already a meditator, and want something with Tibetan roots, but without the 'baggage' , you might find the practice of Tonglen to be worthwhile. Two reasources here at amazon are:

Good Medicine: How to Turn Pain into Compassion with Tonglen Meditation [AUDIOBOOK] [UNABRIDGED] (Audio CD)
by Pema Chodron ISBN-10: 1564558460
---------------------------
Training the Mind: And Cultivating Loving-Kindness (Paperback)
by Chogyam Trungpa , ISBN-10: 1590302524

Take your time reading this book. Do the excercises suggested. You might need to take a year with one of the meditations generously offered by His Holiness. And watch your life change and your love expand. Amazing. True. On the mark.

Another wonderful book in the Dalai Lama's collection. I particularly enjoy this translator, Jeffrey Hopkins, he translates the Dalai Lama's message with a beautiful simplicity. This book is excellent for beginners or for experienced practitioners who want to firm up on the basics, and get some great material for reflection!