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How to be Kinky: A Beginner's Guide to BDSM Paperback – August 12, 2008

4.3 out of 5 stars 34 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

Review

"I was struck right away by [How to Be Kinky’s] honesty, accessibility, practicality, inclusivity, good humor, and confident, friendly tone." — Nina Hartley, porn star, author, and sex educator
--This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

About the Author

A BDSM sex educator for more than a decade, Morpheous has taught workshops in such subjects as rope bondage, the aesthetics of bondage and fetish photography, and advanced and beginner BDSM. He has also taught skill-set specific workshops for professional doms and subs, served as the education director at Toronto’s Bound and Gagged dungeon, and written the hugely popular How to Be Kinky, a beginner’s guide for all things fetish and the follow up How to Be Kinkier.

Morpheous regularly organizes conferences featuring top sex experts including Midori, Chanta Rose and Laura Antiou. These are 3-5 day long events that bring together participants from all over North America. He also performs his own edgy and artistic style of rope bondage at fetish events, galleries, and book launches and his photography has been exhibited in Toronto galleries, including Nuit Blanche, the city’s highly-regarded all-night art installation. His work can be seen at LordMorpheous.com and HowtoBeKinkier.ca.

Morpheous holds a Bachelor’s degree in Education and an Honors degree in Visual Art from the University of Western Ontario, as well as a degree in broadcasting from Fanshawe College. He identifies as a Dominant, and lives in downtown Toronto where he is much sought-after in more ways than one.

Morpheous always encourages discourse between partners and players to facilitate openness and understanding.
--This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 168 pages
  • Publisher: Green Candy Press (August 12, 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1931160635
  • ISBN-13: 978-1931160636
  • Product Dimensions: 8.8 x 6.7 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 12 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (34 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,147,338 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

By James R. Holland VINE VOICE on March 15, 2009
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book is exactly what the title claims. It's definitely for newbies looking to add a little spice to the bedroom and or basement. The author recommends that readers "take your time to learn what gets you hot and bothered and rest assured that just because you like a little bit of 'tie me up with some slap and tickle' in the bedroom doesn't necessarily mean you will give up your day job and start wearing leather 24/7." The sex educator author of this tome, further "wants to encourage others to explore their sexuality in a safe way without fear of reprisal, guilt, or shame either with one partner, or several, or solo. Flirt with your urges and explore."
The author, Morpheous, who is also a Toronto-based fetish photographer/artist has illustrated this beginner's guide book with many of his own pictures. Those images are more relaxed than most fetish photography in that the models are all having a good time; smiling, giggling, smirking and enjoying their role playing. This is a big improvement over the usual images that are designed to illustrate and reinforce the erotic aspects of fantasies of pain, punishment, fear and suffering. This is also a more realist portrayal of the activities detailed in this volume. The writing style has a touch of Toronto to it and that's a good thing. One of the more unusual chapters is a step-by-step guide for the reader and his partner to safely visit a professional Dominatrix or "Domina" as well as exploring the non-professional scene. This is an excellent guide for those people who will quickly discover that they only want to add a little kink as a form of foreplay to their normal sexual relationships.
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Format: Paperback
I really enjoyed this book! I am not new to BDSM, it has been a passion for about 20 years, but even with this much experience I found it informative, engaging and very funny. I dare anyone to read about the author's mother's dishwasher and not LOL. I think this will be a classic and a must have for every kinkster's library.
Well done!
Aurora
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Format: Paperback
Finally a reader-friendly how to book! This book is as user-friendly as it gets...the author writes as if he's actually talking right to you. The book is broken down into categories, so whether you're just curious about one little thing, or you've been online for years and think you're a pro but haven't ventured beyond your living room, this book is for you! I read this book cover to cover and frequently return to my favorite chapters. Buy this book and go sit by your mailbox. Its *that* good.
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
This book is a very useful primer for terminology and methods used within the BDSM community at large- a nice toe in to the door. You'll learn just enough to get an idea of a bit of the potential paths (the more common, less hardcore fetish/kink) that you could take, to set you exploring and figuring out where you would like to take it.

The down side is that it has a heavy bias towards extroversion: parties, clubs, socializing in the BDSM/fetish community, increasingly downplaying more introverted, private expressions of play as less desirable to party life, particularly as the book wore on towards the end. The result for me personally was intense stress, and being turned off and repelled from something that has great meaning to me... so if you're looking for something to broach the topic with a lover that is more introverted and less the social butterfly or exhibitionist, I do advise caution and much communication- try reading it together to buffer it, or you'll loose them at a fragile deciding moment.

I will definitely be reading his other books, but... it takes extreme effort to overcome that personality type barrier.
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Format: Kindle Edition
If you are looking for a beginners guide to BDSM with instruction and amazing color illustrations, then look no further than How to Be Kinky. I loved this book for the down to earth basics and illustrations that show you what is what.

Learn about:

Knot tying
Fetish parties
Safety
Terms used in BDSM
Gagging
Toys
Perspectives from Dominants and submissives
Social parameters
Spanking

And a whole lot more!

This book is broken up into chapters:

1. A Look At Play
2. Social Parameters
3. Scenarios
4. What's On the Menu
5. From Online to Real Life
6. Pain and Pleasure
7. Kink In Toyland
8. Safety
9. Calling in the Professionals
10. Staying Safe and Having Fun Online

As you can see, there is a lot of information. Author Morpheous takes the time to reference kinksters in the act and shows the how to's. This book literally has something for everyone.

Awesome and a 5/5!
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Format: Paperback
This is a great overview guide and a "must-have" for anyone interested or even curious about BDSM. It is NOT intended as a detailed primer; other books go into far greater detail. This book provides insight into just how broad the topic of BDSM is. Anyone can pick this book up, and in minutes discover something they didn't know.

Light reading; a nice book for the nightstand.
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