25 of 27 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
I was soooo ticked when someone gave this book to me, but..., September 2, 2000
By A Customer
I've spent the next 13 years being grateful to them.
I was sitting on the beach. My sister handed me this book. I was totally offended. But I tought, I'm 26 and dating someone who I probably won't marry. Nothing better to do. So I cracked it open. One of the first things I read is: smile at EVERY man you meet who you are pretty sure is not a convicted felon. When I got up to get something out of the car, I walked past a late 30's man who was talking on the phone. Why the h*ll not! I stood up straight and flashed him a brilliant smile. I felt absurd and exposed and like a total goofball. On the way back from the car, same thing -- shoulders back, good posture, winning smile. He literally took the phone away from his ear and stared at me and said "YOU are the cutest thing!"
I sat back down in my beach chair and devoured that book. I'm no great looker and yet I got immediate results. From then on I was fighting the men off. Within six months I met THE guy, two years later we were married. We've been married for 10 years.
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26 of 30 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Eagerness turned to disappointment, August 31, 2006
This review is from: How to Marry the Man of Your Choice (Paperback)
I rarely place book reviews unless I feel strongly about it, and in this case I do. While there are definitely many helpful points to help a woman get married such as exhibiting confidence, etc., there are certain issues which I frankly felt were either not practical or insulting.
1) p. 197 "Another woman told me that she has been "saving herself" for marriage.. She, too, had failed with men...The typical man reacts adversely to virginity in an adult female"
p.168 "Men normally view virginity in an adult female with equal dismay. If a woman older than twenty-five is a virgin and insists on remaining one until she marries, she's likely to die a virgin."
I do not believe premarital sex is a sin leading to fire and brimstone. However, this passage from the book is implying for the many people who do want to save themselves for either religious or personal reasons or the >25 year old virgin, that they are hopeless. This is an insult. If a woman changes her own beliefs just to get married, then she is not being her own true self. To have a true relationship, a woman has to show her true colors, be it premarital sex or chastity. And the age thing? I'm too insulted to comment.
Believe it or not, there are women who married as virgins AFTER 25 years old and are happy.
2) p.179 "If you are fertile, use birth control that's pleasant for him. Don't expect him to use a condom, unless disease prevention is your primary concern or his. Condoms may dull his senses too much."
While #1 above was insulting, #2 is just plain risky. Since premarital sex is obviously advocated in this book, then at the very least condoms should be used. Birth control pills, Depo, the patch, Nuva Ring, to name a few prevent pregnancy, but they don't prevent disease. Condoms NEED to be used. The danger of HIV and sexually transmitted disease (STD) is too great. Not to mention risk of infertility in STD's and potential death in the case of HIV. If there is one thing you get out of this review, at least learn to protect your health.
I had seen how some readers gave 1 star. Yet, because of the 4-5 stars on this book, I gave it the benefit of the doubt. I now know that it definitely falls in the 1 star category.
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36 of 43 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Don't waste your money!, January 21, 2002
By A Customer
This is possibly the worst book on dating I have ever come across. Not only does it contain advice that is at best questionable, but it also has some ideas that are simply loopy. She advocates living together before marriage, even when couples who do are statistically more likely to divorce than those who do not. According to her, those who do not believe in premarital sex, are virgins older than 25, and who don't drive or swim (!), don't have much of a chance. And if that isn't silly enough, she also throws in some nonsense about what not to wear (no pink! no jewelry! no pendants - unless they call attention to your breasts! no earrings! no rings on any finger!). This author has an obsession with male fantasy which, according to her, should ALWAYS be indulged! Worst of all, she discourages men from using condoms because it diminishes their pleasure. Aw, the poor dears! In this age of STDs and AIDS, this piece of tomfoolery is not only bad advice, but it could cost a woman her life.
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