Customer Reviews

How Rude!: The Teenagers' Guide to Good Manners, Proper Behavior, and Not Grossing People Out

5 star:		(31)
4 star:		(7)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(4)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

Question: What teenager would be interested in reading a 465 page book on manners? Answer: Just about any one who is holding a copy of "How Rude!"

I'm so delighted by this book. I'm a father of four, and as I read "How Rude" I asked myself, "What is it that makes this book so effective?" Perhaps it's the simple practicality of its message. The main point is that it's in your own best interests to use good manners. One of the places it says this is on page 109: "Adjust your requests and behavior to the emotions and needs of others. This is not only a cornerstone of politeness, but also a way to increase the chances that your requests will be granted."

Perhaps it works so well because it concerns the things teenagers obsess about, such as how to be popular, how to get your parents let you do what you want, what to do about braces, how to handle friendship problems, and how to get a date. It even talks about when it is OK not to use good manners. The section headings reflect the fascination youth of all ages have: "Things you do to your body" and "Things your body does to you" and "The blended, shaken, stirred or mixed family, " and "Sex-ediquette."

Maybe what makes this book work so well for kids is Packer's dead-on humor, with just the right amount of grossness so that you can't quite turn away. It's a fast-paced kaleidoscope of quips, anecdotes, lists, jokes, and chummy advice. There's no way to lose interest, because it's so juicy and fun. I challenge anyone to open the book to any page and not find some undeniably useful tidbits.

It's a great book for teens, of course, but it's also a great book for parents who are looking for ways of talking about manners with their kids.

I bought this book for my 12 year old son. I found the majority of the book acceptable, entertaining and informative . However the book also had sections geared towards older teens (I assume). I was surprised to find information regarding who should bring the condom on the date and other sexual issues. The book states that wether or not teens should be sexually active is not a topic of this book but if you are sexually active it is beyond rude to....and goes on to list a number of sexual situations.
I was hoping to share this book with my son as I think he could benefit from it. However, I'll be putting it aside until I feel we have discussed some of the sexual issues addressed by the book and he is mature enough to handle it.It's too bad because I think he'd be more likely to want the other information now while he is excited about starting junior high and wanting to be treated as an adult.I

Wonderful! Very witty, quite clever, and presents etiquette in a non-threatening, humorous, but also very honest way. While some might challenge the author for saying things like "good manners will get other people to more willingly give you things", the truth of the matter is that it *is* true, and youth wil be more prone to listen to the advice if they realize that they will benefit materially (the restaurant manager will be willing to let you stay at the table a little longer and provide better service), not just abstractly (you'll earn the admiration of the elderly people in your church). The appreciation for the abstract awards will come when they hit college, assuming they can be convinced to follow etiquette before they go to college.

If only all teens (and adults) would read this and relaize that eating iwth your open is rude, gross, annoying, and unecessary, we'd be a much better world.

All teens should have a class/course/book on ettiquette, and of the books I have read (admiteedly nowhere near as many as are out there), this one is my favorite so far for depth of information, and presentation of it. Many good pictures, and a pretty straightforward and logical format. I also very much appreciate that throughout the book are some real-world etiquette questions that youth have asked, about addressing friend's step-parents, how to go on a date, saying thnk you for gifts, dealing with problems in school and at home in a civil and gentlemanly/ladylike way, and even some sexual situations (how to say no, how to talk openly, how to respect one another...). Teens will definitely appreciate that the book isn't working only in the abstract, but has many eamples of real-world problems. Problems that never fit nicely into any one category, either, which is where pretty much every real world problem exists. That's why we have etiquette!

I suggest this book for all teenagers.

At 465 pages, this nonfiction book is longer than many fiction books. Who knew there was so much to say about manners? But apparently, there is, and Dr. Packer deals with it in a light, amusing way that had me laughing so hard I actually fell on the floor. It also includes some valuable information known to few -i.e. "don't floss your teeth before having sex".

However, some of the opinions expressed in this book are rather immoral. I was somewhat dismayed when Dr. Packer praised the reader who sent in the comment detailing how she and a friend swap answers when doing homework. That is not "efficiency", as Dr. Packer says, that is cheating. And it was dispiriting to see him list the only reason to be nice to "ignorant jerks" as "one of them might turn out to be a Hollywood talent agent". What about compassion? What about politeness? What about an ability to see inside the person? No, the only reason you should be nice to them is for personal gain. That is not a good message to send to teenagers.

This is easily the most popular book in my waiting room. I see both parents and adolescents looking at it and laughing. It is actually an etiquette book, but Emily Post would probably run away screaming if she saw this one.

The author uses amusing "stories from the manners frontier" and fictional anecdotes. Some parents may be "grossed out" by examples of what not to do in public. Still, the message to the adolescent is clear. It is in your own best interest to be polite, courteous and responsible. That is ultimately the best way to get what you want.

Carol E. Watkins, M.D.

" This book is about manners. If it makes you feel like throwing up, at least say excuse me on your way to the bathroom." School manners, family manners, talking manners, walking manners, eating manners, greeting manners: this book teaches all the manners in the world and then some. It's a well written book, and the quizzes are especially good. An average question in a quiz:

You're at the symphony and you feel like throwing up. Do you:

a) Exit quickly and quietly as you can

b) Ask the lady next to you if you can borrow her purse, or

c) Heave to the beat.

You can learn the greeting practices of the middle east or the eating manners of a fancy restaurant. This book is best read for a laugh because most teenagers will give you the wrong answer and think it's right. It has value in it too, so do't think I'm saying it doesn't teach manners. If you want a book to get a teenager like me back on track, How Rude is the book to get.

This past Christmas, I bought this book for my 11yr. old daughter as well as 5 other 11-12yr. olds (both female and male) on our list. It has been the most appreciated and talked about gift of the year (still yet) by both kids and their parents. The appeal seems to be the humor in which manners and the lack of manners are addressed. The book also includes reproducible pages to help serve as reminders, should any of us forget, for example, "The Fifty Commandments of Family Etiquette," or "The Fourteen Commandments of Toiletiquette," which includes the Thou Shalts as well as the Thou Shalt nots! Packer certainly knows this age group. I have also read Bringing up Parents which may turn into the gift of the year 2002!

My fifth grade grandson asked for a copy of this book after reading through parts of it at a friend's home. His friend received her copy as a Christmas gift. I suspect she showed it to him to try and improve on his typical fifth grade boy manners (or lack thereof). Since he began reading we have all seen noticable improvement in how the relates to both other youth and adults around him. He mostly uses it as a reference book, and looks up what it says about specific problems as they come up. I am certain he has looked through the section on Sex Ediquette because he is starting to become courious about those things, but we found nothing there that should not be covered in the "sex education" part of his regular health classes. I would recommend the book for any youth in Middle School.

I have three boys who think the funniest thing in the world is a colossal burp at the table. I bought this book and read it. It hits right to the heart of the matter. As I read to the boys at the table, "It's okay to tell jokes and be silly, but it's not okay to belch, burp, and stick straws up your nose."

I started by randomly picking a page at dinner and reading or relating the topic. Most of the time we end up laughing and talking about other rude behaviors. Sometimes the pages we read are initiated by an activity at the table (burping, reaching, talking with your mouth full)and sometimes it is initiated by some thing that happened that day (someone got pushed, received a gift they didn't really like etc.) We do this at dinner most nights (for a very short period - after all it would be rude to monopolize the conversation - as my boys have pointed out.) I knew it was working when the mother of one of my son's friends called and said that he had had such a good time at dinner (at our house) and came home telling his family the polite way to ask for and pass food around the table. She wanted the book!

With a bit of trepidation, we gave this book to our 18-year-old niece 3 days before Christmas with the request that she read sections to the whole gang prior to each large family meal (which traditionally lacked basic "please" and "thank you"). Little did we know that these readings would bring loads of laughter, fun and, by the time we sat down to our Christmas meal, impectable manners by young and old (ages 7-70) alike! We strongly recommend this book. In regards to the section on sex, we found it innocuous, brief and appropriate.