Customer Reviews

How to Say It For Women: Communicating with Confidence and Power Using the Language of Success

5 star:		(18)
4 star:		(1)
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1 star:		(4)

 

 

Dr. Phyllis Mindell begins her work with an opening that outlines the benefits you will gain as a reader, and advice for making the most of the book. Among Dr. Mindell's long list of promises are some very audacious ones, such as "influence policy decisions at the top" "improve your career" and "lead and manage successfully". Upon reading this intro, I was intrigued but highly skeptical. After all, Phyllis didn't know my particular situation, the politics in my company, or the people with whom I am dealing. How then, I wondered, could she guarantee me such dramatic results? After reading the book and seeing immediate improvement in my professional life, I understand that that is the point indeed--the issues faced by women in all professions and at all levels have common roots! Dr. Mindell has discovered the true cause of women's relative lack of success in the workplace when compared to men: a failure to appreciate and utilize the power of language. Unfortunately, we are often guilty of self-sabotage in which we undermine our own effectiveness with weak language or an attempt to imitate the "strong" language of men.Fortunately, Dr. Mindell has developed a language style for women and she teaches it in a practical, actionable way with lots of examples and tools to show the reader "how to transform your life by transforming your language". She also discusses style and dressing for success, as well as power reading, both important issues related to that of language. The book's effect on me was immediate, as I was reading it on a plane on the way to Brazil: I had to write a presentation to give in Sao Paulo and was "cheating" by using my time to read instead. However, when I got to the chapter on organizing and writing effective presentations, I simply followed the outline and got mine done in half the time. I also received many compliments for my apparent "off the cuff" speech the next day at the Energy conference. Little did they know that I had the help of an "expert"! I loved the whole book and read it in a couple of sittings although it is not a "light read" by any means. I am now recommending "How to Say it For Women" to all my women colleagues and friends. The book is a good investment and a steal at that price.

I read about this book - actually, I consider it a textbook - when searching for tools on expanding my career. I usually wouldn't buy something like this, and instead look for similar information from free 'Net sources. But on a whim, I bought it, and am so glad I did. I'm not even halfway through and what I've learned already has helped me to speak and express myself in a way that gets people's attention, and has improved my professional image. One of the best tips, which comes early in the book, is catching myself using the "I think/like/don't like" phrase when I want to discuss facts. I do it, so I don't look like a know-it-all. Dr. Mindell, however, shows several ways to express facts without appearing as though I have all the answers.

The author also cites common grammar and language mistakes that keep women in the background, and prevent us from asserting our strengths and skills. The concept of Weak Language is especially intriguing; in reviewing the examples, I saw myself in almost every one. Her solutions are very attainable, but she strongly recommends practicing this new language with another woman. I have, and my women friends were amazed at how powerful this "new" language sounds.

These are hard habits to break, but with the tips and examples in this book, I'm getting better at it. And I can see the difference in how others treat me; more importantly, I feel different about myself. The book is really a life-changing experience, for someone who has never really put much thought into my "image" but is continually frustrated at not getting the positive attention for my work success as I believe I deserve. Thank you Dr. Mindell!

I can't recommend this book highly enough. As a leadership coach in Silicon valley I often help women managers and executives to become better leaders, and this book speaks directly to two of the biggest roadblocks to women's advancement: communication and confidence. These women are shocked at how closely Mindell understands their work challenges. The book takes highly volatile, challenging workplace situations and offers suggestions that immediately actionable.

I am using this book as a reference for my students in a business english course in Japan. Although the students find reading it cover to cover a bit too much (lower intermediate English level) when I point out specific points and pages I want them to read and understand, they really get a lot out of it. The book is written well and ideas are developed and backed up clearly. I would recommend this to any teachers of women students.

How to Say It For Women delivers an action plan to convey confidence in today's business environment. Whether it is in speech, writing or behavior, the guidelines outlined provide a common sense approach to successful business communication.

How to Say It for Women is the only guide to communication I'll ever need. It not only gives great tips on reading, writing, speaking, listening, style, and body language, but it even gives "crib sheets" that suggest exact words to say in hard situations (job interviews, conflicts, performance appraisals). To top it off, the checklist on leadership skills show a clear way to perfect my skills. And the idea of using Charlotte the spider as the role model is so much fun and brings me back to my own childhood.

How to Say It for Women is the only guide to communication I'll ever need. It not only gives great tips on reading, writing, speaking, listening, style, and body language, but it even gives "crib sheets" that suggest exact words to say in hard situations (job interviews, conflicts, performance appraisals). To top it off, the checklist on leadership skills show a clear way to perfect my skills. And the idea of using Charlotte the spider as the role model is so much fun and brings me back to my own childhood.

In the course of a year, I met the two most articulate, elegantly spoken people I have ever encountered. One was a (male) CEO of a large company. The other was a (female) public relations person working in the entertainment industry. I did business with the former and became close friends with the latter. Both made me feel just a little inadequate about my use of language. I knew I was far more intelligent than my speech presented. One day, after listening to my friend say one of her gorgeously precise sentences, I asked her where she had learned to speak so powerfully, always able to find the most effective word, always able to form them into the most on-the-mark sentences. Her answer was this book.

I would never have picked it up on my own. The "for women" part would have put me off. I wasn't thinking of my "weak" language as a gender issue. But, even if you don't look at things that way, this book will help you.

Read it. Do the exercises. You'll think about language in a whole new way and find yourself being listened to -and believed- more than ever.

Dr.Mindell knows how to make hard things seem easy,like how to plan a presentation without panic,how not to let fear stop you,and the different kinds of e-writing.My favorite chapters are the ones about style[don't vacuum while wearing high heels,shape doesn't matter],listening,and interviewing.I recommend it for everyone.

I bought this book at a womens' leadership conference a couple of years ago. I read it cover-to-cover and decided to try the skills covered when communicating in my office. My supervisors' opinions of me changed drastically - they began to view me as surly and defiant. I didn't think any of the verbage alternatives were rude, but in the organization where I was working, the higher-ups expected you to consider them omnipotent and not have an opinion of your own. Ultimately one should consider their audience and adjust their language accordingly.