Chapter One: The Aries Man
What He's Like
He's ardent and enthusiastic, impulsive and aggressive. Mr. Aries has the personality of a warrior who wants to set the world on fire. And because he can be so wildly romantic, he can also ignite quite a flame in your heart.
His energy is boundless, his self-assurance astounding. He is a born leader who isn't bashful when it comes to boasting of his achievements. At the same time, he can be both proud and supportive of yours.
Mr. Aries has a mind that moves in overdrive. He thinks faster than he can talk, runs rather than walks, and can take on more projects than ten people put together. Whatever he does, from functioning as president of a company to playing tennis, he does it ambitiously.
Essentially, he has an all-or-nothing attitude toward his undertakings. And when he is in his "all" phase, he can be totally consumed by the emotion of the moment. Whether it's working, loving, or simply living, Mr. Aries' passions play a leading role. Even before the world has awakened, he is the knight on a charger galloping toward some intense experience. Anything less would bring on an attack of boredom and make him unfit to be around.
Generally speaking, his personality is impatient, at times temperamental, and often self-serving. Caught in the midst of an impulsive action, he can forget that it is upon people's feelings that he is treading. Mr. Aries operates strongly from self-interest and sometimes from sheer selfishness. However, it's precisely his "me first and perhaps you later" attitude that not only gets him what he wants, but gets it quickly. When caught in the tides of a fulminating temper, he can be truly intimidating to meeker souls. He knows it and uses it to further his goals. But when it works, he is usually too busy beginning something new to even notice.
Not only does he thrive on power, he considers it his divine right. And he's the first to admit that probably nobody deserves it as much as he does. At the same time, he can cheerfully drive himself past the kind of limits that would make any normal person pass out from sheer exhaustion. Essentially, Mr. Aries loves work, just as he loves to create things -- that he can tell other lesser beings how to finish.
He loathes low-energy people, pessimistic souls, and dreary people who would never engage in grand schemes. At the same time, he thrives on power, startling passion, and the feeling of first love, even if it's for the hundredth time. Although Mr. Aries can be loyal, his emotional memory does a sudden fade-out when his romantic drama starts to look more like a lengthy documentary. Since he is a man addicted to "firsts" in record time, his feelings find expression in a new grand love, career goal, or great passion. And each time he will enthusiastically attest that it is just the very best.
Although in the business world he can be tricky and at times manipulative, in romantic relationships he is honest and direct, and expects the same. While nothing makes his pulse race like a good challenge, he also likes his woman of the moment to speak her mind directly. He is much too busy to be bothered with unexpressed feelings or subtle maneuvers. Therefore, he'll run roughshod over any female who is too timid to tell him what she wants and why. Yet at the same time, she must give him the kind of attention that will assure him that she has the best taste simply because she prefers him. Mr. Aries' ego is larger than the Atlantic Ocean. At the same time, it needs to bask in a brilliant sunshine or else he'll see to it that the tide is always out.
What He Thinks He Wants
His favorite things are power and grand passion, and the preferred amount is even more than a lot. Essentially Mr. Aries would like to have total power and recognition in anything he undertakes. And on the side, he would highly appreciate a grand love that would make him feel like his life is a midnight movie minus commercial interruption. Should all of these priorities fail to be immediately forthcoming, he'll simply settle for momentary excitement and a situation in which he stands in command.
What He Needs
His ego is the center of his universe, and he needs it nurtured daily with large doses of admiration. Aside from that, Mr. Aries needs a lot of love, attention, and approval. Sexually, he is insatiable, and he therefore requires someone who can keep up with his habitual forays. Finally, because he can have the fiercest temper, he needs a woman who will not only stand up to him during his more intimidating moments, but who will cool him out during his daily combustions and self-created crises.
What He Fears
This is a most courageous man who not only fears little, but who often finds fearful things exciting. His daring often attracts danger just as his need to push life to the limits can create a lot of havoc. However, if he were to fear anything, it would be the type of rejection that would sabotage his ego and severely compromise his self-esteem. Even when he's wrong, Mr. Aries needs to feel that it's so unimportant that if anyone has noticed, he or she really shouldn't have.
His Attitude Toward Women, Love, and Sex
He is passion personified and can be so ardent with his affections that he can make a woman feel that she's never been loved before. While he may not follow through with flowers, his feelings are romantic and his emotions intense. When he's in love he can be loyal, loving, jealous, and generally consumed with feeling. Mr. Aries is also capable of strings of one-night stands and sex that is more biologic than rhapsodic. Ideally he would love to be in love. However, should that be missing, or even waning, he is not at all shy about seeking his satisfactions elsewhere. Since his sexual energy is so strong that it could probably shatter glass, Mr. Aries needs his outlets. Strenuous athletics and a consuming devotion to his career often help. Outside of that, casual sex is something that he is certainly not opposed to. Essentially he is a highly sexed being who has a spontaneous approach -- i.e., whoever happens to be turning his wheels at the moment may very soon be in his bed. However, whether she ever sees him after sunrise depends on how intensely she keys into his emotions. When not emotionally involved, Mr. Aries can be so cut and dried that he is capable of turning on the news in a moment of afterglow. On the other hand, when he is truly impassioned, he would neither notice nor care if you stopped dieting and gained weight, as long as you gave him a lot of affection.
His Good Points
He is exciting, energetic, strong, courageous, and powerful. He lives his life intensely and without fear. Mr. Aries is a man who can make the majority of men seem like weaklings. He has a self-confidence that is contagious and a stellar enthusiasm that is truly magical. His passion for life and love is to be envied, as is his ability to be clear about the desires that he satisfies in record time.
His Bad Points
He can be selfish, egotistical, insensitive, and emotionally capricious. The less-evolved Aries man lives merely for his immediate satisfactions and will tread on the feelings of anyone who might interfere. He sees to it that each person around him has a function that ultimately feeds his feelings of power. And because he is so impatient and temperamental, he'll fail to find the time to show either gratitude or appreciation.
How to Get His Attention
Mr. Aries responds to high energy, flash, dazzle, and more than a touch of the obvious. He is a sucker for a low-cut blouse, a short skirt, a sexy smile, and conversation centered around him. Therefore, appeal to his baser instincts and approach him. Compliment him on his clothes and say something else with your eyes. Be dynamic, enthusiastic, and very direct. Maneuver the focus to his work and make him feel important. Then suggest continuing the conversation over dinner.
How to Keep It
Passion and patience are prerequisite to keeping the fires burning. Sexually, the Aries man is enthusiastic and direct. Sometimes too direct. If you don't tell him what you want, he'll forget to ask. He's got all the instincts of the Ram, but his technique often needs refining. Therefore, he'll supply the energy, but you must supply the imagination. Be warm, affectionate, soothing, and supportive. At the same time, if he in any way tries to bully you, coolly hold your ground. Mr. Aries would rather have a woman he can respect, not walk on. On the other hand, that doesn't mean that he won't occasionally try. Firmly make him aware of your feelings and expectations, and should he forget, assertively remind him. Overpower him with physical affection while you make him aware of your special powers. However, at all times let him know that they won't compete with his, and never let him forget it.
Mr. Aries is not the easiest man to live with, but he might be one of the most exciting. If you really want him, you must have the self-assurance that you deserve him. At the same time, you must be strong enough to love him without being enslaved by his demands. The only successful relationship with an Aries man is an equal one. If you are ready for the challenge of taming someone who has to be convinced of equality, than you're on the right track to a great love.
Copyright © 1980, 1994 by Robin MacNaughton