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How Should a Person Be?: A Novel from Life [Kindle Edition]

Sheila Heti
3.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (63 customer reviews)

Print List Price: $25.00
Kindle Price: $9.99 includes free wireless delivery via Amazon Whispernet
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Sold by: Macmillan

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Book Description

A raw, startling, genre-defying novel of friendship, sex, and love in the new millennium—a compulsive read that's like "spending a day with your new best friend" (Bookforum)

Reeling from a failed marriage, Sheila, a twentysomething playwright, finds herself unsure of how to live and create. When Margaux, a talented painter and free spirit, and Israel, a sexy and depraved artist, enter her life, Sheila hopes that through close—sometimes too close—observation of her new friend, her new lover, and herself, she might regain her footing in art and life.

Using transcribed conversations, real emails, plus heavy doses of fiction, the brilliant and always innovative Sheila Heti crafts a work that is part literary novel, part self-help manual, and part bawdy confessional. It's a totally shameless and dynamic exploration into the way we live now, which breathes fresh wisdom into the eternal questions: What is the sincerest way to love? What kind of person should you be?



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Editorial Reviews

From Bookforum

Heti truly has a startling voice all her own, and a fresh take on fiction and autobiography's overlap. Her mix of hyperreal detail, sweeping gestures from the realm of parable, and self-reflexive distortions leaves us wondering what's real and what's invented. — Johanna Fateman

Review

A New York Times Notable Book of 2012

“Funny...odd, original, and nearly unclassifiable...unlike any novel I can think of.”—David Haglund, The New York Times Book Review

“Brutally honest and stylistically inventive, cerebral, and sexy.”—San Francisco Chronicle

“One of the bravest, strangest, most original novels I’ve read this year.”—Christopher Boucher, The Boston Globe

“A vital and funny picture of the excitements and longueurs of trying to be a young creator in a free, late-capitalist Western city.”—James Wood, The New Yorker

“A book that risks everything...Complex, artfully messy, and hilarious.”—Miranda July

“A really amazing metafiction-meets-nonfiction novel.”—Lena Dunham

"It is easy to see why a book on the anxiety of celebrity has turned the author into one herself."—The Economist

"A seriously strange but funny plunge into the quest for authenticity."—Margaret Atwood

“Boldly original...Gorgeously rendered.”—NPR

“Bawdy, idiosyncratic...The title makes me quake with envy. All good books should be called just that.”—Chad Harbach

"A significant cultural artifact."—LA Review of Books

"Original...hilarious...Part confessional, part play, part novel, and more—it’s one wild ride...Think HBO’S Girls in book form." —Marie Claire

How Should a Person Be? teeters between youthful pretension and irony in ways that are as old as Flaubert’s Sentimental Education...but Ms. Heti manages to give Sheila’s struggle a contemporary and particular feel...How Should a Person Be? reveals a talented young voice of a still inchoate generation.”—Kay Hymowitz, The Wall Street Journal

“I read this eccentric book in one sitting, amazed, disgusted, intrigued, sometimes titillated I’ll admit to that, but always in awe of this new Toronto writer who seems to be channeling Henry Miller one minute and Joan Didion the next.  Heti’s book is pretty ugly fiction, accent on the pretty.”Alan Cheuse, NPR’s All Things Considered

“Heti’s craft never fails…Novels are supposed to grab one’s attention, and Heti’s wonderfully baggy, honest and affecting book does exactly that.”—New Orleans Times-Picayune

“Not the kind of book that comes along often. It’s highly quotable, funny, shocking, anxiety-inducing and, finally, inspiring… It is undeniably of the moment, a blueprint of how to be lost in the Internet Age.”—Thought Catalog

“Heti knows what she’s doing—much of the pleasure of How Should a Person Be? comes from watching her control the norms she’s subverting.”—Michelle Dean, Slate

"[A] breakthrough novel...Just as Mary McCarthy’s The Company She Keeps (written at the same age) was an explosive and thrilling rejoinder to the serious, male coming-of-age saga exemplified during her era by Sartre’s The Age of Reason, Heti’s book exuberantly appropriates the same, otherwise tired genre to encompass female experience. How Should a Person Be?’s deft, picaresque construction, which lightly-but-devastatingly parodies the mores of Toronto’s art scene, has more in common with Don Quixote than with Lena Dunham’s HBO series “Girls” or the fatuous blogs and social media it will, due to its use of constructed reality, inevitably be compared with…Like [Kathy] Acker, [Heti] is a brilliant, original thinker and an engaging writer. "—Chris Kraus, LA Review of Books

“If you're not already reading Sheila Heti's second novel How Should A Person Be?, you should be. Heti's rousing, unapologetically messy, beautifully written, insightful and provocative book explores the frustrations and rewards of female friendship, and of trying to make art as a young woman in the 21st century...Heti is doing something very exciting within the form of the novel.” —Jezebel

“Heti excels at developing a cast of engaging, colorful and flawed characters.”—Willamette Week

“Enlightening, profoundly intelligent, and charming to read....It reflects life in its incredible humor—and in some of its weird bits that might be muddled or unclear...with anxiety, hilarity and lots of great conversation.”—Interview Magazine

“There are no convenient epiphanies in Sheila Heti’s newest book How Should a Person Be? Instead there are several intertwined, grinding and brilliantly uncomfortable ones that require the reader to shed a few dozen layers in the service of self-discovery...She may depart from broad harbors, but she is an analytic zealot, never imparting trite one-liners or excusing herself. Reading her is an act of participation, discomfort and joy.”—SF Weekly

“Lena Dunham loves this novel…A fresh spin on friendship, art, sex, and philosophy in five acts. And the prose, often taking the form of a numbered list, is always engaging.”—Daily Candy

“[Heti creates] one of the most personable antiheroes ever...Her tone can be earnest and eager to please, flippant and crass, terribly lucid and darkly funny...Her tortured self-deprecation can read a little like Violette Leduc’s, and her poetic bluntness sometimes reminds me of Eileen Myles, but these authors come to mind mostly because, like Heti, they have written about women with unusual detail and feeling. Heti truly has a startling voice all her own, and a fresh take on fiction and autobiography’s overlap.”—Bookforum

“Oh crap. I don’t know how to begin talking about Sheila Heti or how good she is.  People will say How Should A Person Be? is reminiscent of Patti Smith’s Just Kids or Ann Patchett’s Truth & Beauty and both of these things will be true.  But I am still reeling from the originality of this novel.  There are passages here so striking, to read them is to be punched in the heart.”—Sloane Crosley, author of How Did You Get This Number

"The book’s form is fluid and unpredictable… [and] the architecture gives the prose a circular, easy feeling, even though Heti is taking a hard look at what makes life meaningful and how one doesn’t end up loveless and lost. It is book peopled by twentysomethings but works easily as a manual for anyone who happens to have run into a spiritual wall."—Sasha Frere-Jones, The Paris Review

"Utterly beguiling: blunt, charming, funny, and smart. Heti subtly weaves together ideas about sex, femininity and artistic ambition. Reading this genre-defying book was pure pleasure."—David Shields, author of Reality Hunger

"[A]n unforgettable book: intellectually exacting, unsettling in its fragility, bodily as anything painted by Freud, experimental yet crafted as hell, and yes, very funny."—The National Post

"Sheila Heti’s novel-from-life, How Should a Person Be?, was published in Canada in 2010, but won’t be out in the US until next June. Watch for it – it’s great." —Chad Harbach, author of The Art of Fielding


Product Details

  • File Size: 336 KB
  • Print Length: 320 pages
  • Page Numbers Source ISBN: 0805094725
  • Publisher: Henry Holt and Co. (June 19, 2012)
  • Sold by: Macmillan
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B0071VUO7U
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray: Enabled
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #55,814 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

There is no character development. milou  |  16 reviewers made a similar statement
I truly hope this isn't based on her real life, because that would be just sad. Olive  |  2 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
17 of 19 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Pretty good June 8, 2012
Format:Hardcover|Amazon Vine™ Review (What's this?)
The main reason I chose to read this novel is that another reviewer compared it to Scarlett Thomas, one of my favorite novelists. While I do see some similarities, I think that Thomas has far more interesting ideas that she explores with her writing, at least to me. How Should A Person Be? is a (semi?) autobiographical novel, whose main character, Sheila, is working on a play and hangs out with her artist friends, pondering the question in the title: how should a person be? I found the beginning of the novel to be quite boring, especially when she talked about her failed marriage. Thankfully, soon Sheila meets Margaux, a painter, and things get interesting from there. We get transcripts of conversations recorder on Sheila's recorder, and plenty of e-mails. I love that kind of stuff in novels. She also meets Israel, an artist that she says is much better in bed than at art. There is a quite explicit chapter close to the middle of the book where Sheila rants about Israel and how everyone should get together with him, which was quite hilarious. There was a chapter in the beginning of the book where Sheila talks to her Jungian analyst about what it means to be a puer aeternus, a person who never really grows up. That section spoke to me more than anything else in the whole book.

Overall, I really liked How Should A Person Be? It was a pretty quick read. It was at turns boring, depressing, funny, touching, insightful, and even repulsive. It's a novel about what it means to be an artist, what it means to be a woman, and more importantly, what it means to be human. There is no great answer at the end of the book, but isn't that the way life is anyway?

Recommended if you're in the mood for something a little different, that makes you think about the meaning (or meaninglessness) of it all, for a little while.
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17 of 21 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Can't Believed This Was Published July 25, 2012
Format:Hardcover|Amazon Vine™ Review (What's this?)
This is truly one of the strangest novels I have ever read. I like quirky and am a big fan of Miranda July (who wrote one of the book's endorsements), and July is likely the author I would most closely compared Sheila Heti with. But Heti is no Miranda July.

Overall, there is no coherent novel-worthy storyline. There are snippets of life (embellished one imagines, since the book is listed as fiction) that can best be called short stories. A few I found brilliant, insightful (for example, the Miami Beach spider tale). Overall, the rest was a lot of rambling about a life I didn't find that interesting. Sorry, Sheila.

The main storyline (if one can call it that) seems to center around her relationship with her friend Margaux. Still, this is not like any friendship I have ever had or read about. And these two women consider themselves geniuses! What?

Then, and perhaps most disheartening about the whole book, there is the author's relationship with Israel, her lover. Frankly, that could have well and truly been removed from the book.

The author complains throughout the book about men always trying to teach her something (not an invalid complaint, by the way), but her relationship with this man is far more abusive than a man simply boring her.

In the end, I did find some of the book incredibly insightful, but overall it wasn't worth reading through the rest to get there.
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22 of 28 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars How should we then live? May 4, 2012
Format:Hardcover|Amazon Vine™ Review (What's this?)
Sheila is a divorced playwright living in Toronto. Although she has a broader social circle centered in the local art scene, she latches onto one particular artist, Margaux, after her divorce. They quickly journey from casual acquaintance and mutual admiration to close friendship, something more fulfilling but entailing more risk as well. Romantically, she becomes the lust interest of the sexy, brooding artist, Israel. The novel uses these relationships as a means for Sheila's self-exploration. Structurally, there's a loose linear narrative, but it's hardly the book's focus. Sheila is obsessed with determining how she should live. How is a young female artist supposed to be? As she reminisces about past boyfriends, finds and loses a husband, makes new friends, and struggles to write (and alternately to avoid writing) a "feminine" (if not feminist) play - while her friends compete to see who can create the ugliest painting - she reveals herself and her search to the reader.

"How Should a Person Be?" is no conventional novel, but a fictionalized (to what extent?) memoir. Sheila is the only character developed in any way. Margaux and Israel (and the other bit players) exist only as a means for Sheila's own self-exploration and expression. So if Margaux appears to be something of an artistic savant, incredibly gifted but socially awkward and aloof, and Israel appears to be sadistic and perverse, focused only on deriving sexual pleasure from Sheila's humiliation, perhaps they aren't to blame. Sheila's inner life is the novel's focus.

Sheila is an engaging, fascinating protagonist. Profoundly self-aware, she exposes her thoughts, feelings, and motivations with complete transparency. Whether she's tapping into Jungian archetypes like the Puer Aeternus and analyzing dreams or pondering her Jewish heritage in the vein of how Moses' struggles might mirror her own, her mind is vibrant and alive. She's completely empathetic because her plight is universal. Her voice is utterly authentic (surely in no small part due to the not so subtle autobiographical nature of the novel).

As intriguing and enjoyable as the novel is, however, the latter half doesn't fulfill the promise of the beginning. Sheila's search doesn't culminate in anything radical if it can be said to culminate at all. Although she arrives at certain conclusions and learns a few lessons, the search is by no means complete. Sheila doesn't seem to have obviously or substantively matured or evolved in any meaningful way over the course of the novel. The author provides a delightfully intimate portrait of her struggle, but it's clearly ongoing. To that end, a sequel in a few years time would provide a very intriguing case study!

Readers who enjoy Scarlett Thomas' novels would likely enjoy this one. The protagonists share more than a passing resemblance and they explore similar themes.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
2.0 out of 5 stars over-rated?
A relatively quick and wildly inconsistent read which I can only describe as time spent with a less than likeable main character. Read more
Published 7 days ago by N. Ferguson
2.0 out of 5 stars Interesting idea but result is too mundane
Much has been made in the media about the similarity in approach of Sheila Heti's fictionalised autobiographical "How Should A Person Be? Read more
Published 8 days ago by Ripple
3.0 out of 5 stars Too much gun info
This is definitely a gun expert writing this book...plus I lived through all the assignations of the 60's and we all know there was a second shooter.... Read more
Published 11 days ago by Katy
4.0 out of 5 stars Time for a rethink
Please note that the title of this book is not 'How a person should be'. The title is a question (that goes back over two thousand three hundred years to Aristotle and beyond) and... Read more
Published 25 days ago by D.K. Janotta
2.0 out of 5 stars Fails to take advantage of the moment it seeks to define
Two stars, and I'm feeling that's on the generous side. Here is Sheila Heti's "How Should a Person Be? A Novel from Life," with a first person protagonist named Sheila. Read more
Published 27 days ago by George Grella
3.0 out of 5 stars Reads Like a First Draft of a Pretty Good Book
This book is a third-wave-feminist coming-of-age novel in need of significant editing.

Imagine that the fictional character Carrie Bradshaw (the protagonist of the TV... Read more
Published 28 days ago by D. Terry
1.0 out of 5 stars This is unreadable.
This book is really the first novel I have been unable to finish.It is self-indulgent poorly written claptrap and I would advise any one thinking of reading it to STOP NOW. Read more
Published 28 days ago by Pellagirl1
5.0 out of 5 stars Interesting book
This is part book part self help novel. Think of it as hbo girls in book form. I really enjoyed reading this book not for kids. Perfect pool book this summer.
Published 1 month ago by Edward Walker
5.0 out of 5 stars Unique cadenza
This contains the lively, active imagination of a real person navigating the real world. There is a lot of brain going on here, something I highly respect. Read more
Published 1 month ago by Steve Smooth
5.0 out of 5 stars propelled myself through pages
The grandiose title immediately attracted me when this came across my goodread's friends feed last year and the outraged reviews drew me in further. Read more
Published 1 month ago by Bang Potential
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