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How to Win a Fight With a Conservative [Kindle Edition]

Daniel Kurtzman
3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (55 customer reviews)

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Book Description

How to Win a Fight With a Conservative is the ultimate survival guide to arguing politics, filled with all the cunning strategies, damning facts, and merciless ridicule liberals need to lay the smackdown on right-wing blowhards everywhere.

This perennially popular book, now in its second edition, has been revised and updated with all new mockery for the 2012 election season.

Get ready to fight the right with laughter thanks to this irreverent yet practical guide, which features winning comebacks to conservative nonsense and devastating jabs at Mitt Romney, Tea Partiers, and GOP clowns from Michele Bachmann to Sarah Palin.

Learn how to:
  • Hurl witty retorts at Obama haters, Bible-thumpers, and Wall Street shills
  • Explain why the Left is right and the Right is wrong with the dueling Conservative and Liberal Manifestos
  • Survive family sparring matches, manage workplace squabbles, and learn to cope if you're sleeping with the enemy
  • Entertain your friends and terrify your enemies while arguing politics on Facebook and Twitter
  • Use conservatives' words against them with a handy compilation of moronic right-wing quotes
Partisan warfare has never been so much fun!

Editorial Reviews


"You should pick up this book before your next dinner party."
--Gayle King, editor-at-large of O, The Oprah Magazine and host of "The Gayle King Show" on Oprah and Friends

Book Description

"No one knows political satire like Daniel Kurtzman."
--Andy Borowitz, creator of The Borowitz Report and author of The Republican Playbook

Product Details

  • File Size: 393 KB
  • Print Length: 240 pages
  • Publisher: Sourcebooks; Rev Upd edition (June 1, 2012)
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B00850ZN6S
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #143,217 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
159 of 177 people found the following review helpful
A friend gave me this book for Christmas this year because she knew how much I enjoyed ranting about politics. While it is not truly a self-help book, and I doubt anyone will win a fight with a conservative by following its directions, it is an enjoyable little diversion that made me laugh. Daniel Kurtzman is a good satirist and his jabs are hilarious. For instance, he divides the conservative movement into several cleverly named segments:
(1) Rapturfarians--Christian fundamentalists.
(2) Enron-omists--über capitalists.
(3) Big Brethren--militant authoritarians.
(4) Gunfederates--people with confederate flags and gun racks in their pickup trucks.
(5) Spongebob-ophobes--militant anti-gay activists.
(6) Crusadomasochists--imperialistic neoconservatives.
Clever names to be sure, but the descriptions are just as humorous. The rest of the book is just as much fun. I should mention that Daniel Kurtzman is an equal opportunity satirist; he also published in 2007 another guide, "How to Win a Fight with a Liberal," that takes aim at those on the left. It is just as humorous.
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88 of 108 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Pure Fabulosity. June 21, 2007
I came across this book (and its partner) by accident and bought them as a gift for someone who spends most evenings yelling at Fox News. Since his yelling doesn't seem to make any difference to the TV, I thought maybe if he had some practical advice for handling a political debate things might improve...

These books (Of course I bought both. How can you not?) are so clever and funny that I ended up reading them both myself before turning them over to the gift recipient. They are chock-full of "funny-because-it's-true" moments, great quotes, and my personal favorite, a schedule for a typical day in the life of liberals and conservatives. Hysterical.

Oh yeah, and the gift recipient loved them, too.
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17 of 22 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A fun, quick read December 4, 2007
By Cindy W
This is a really funny, enjoyable book. It has lots of great quizzes, lists, and do's and don'ts that make it easy to jump into at any point. And I loved all the quotes from Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. Great stuff!
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9 of 11 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Enlightening and entertaining! June 20, 2011
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
Who doesn't want to learn how to win an argument? This book gives a lighthearted but effective means on how to do so. It helps to identify which method is most productive with particular kinds of conservatives as well as helping you to determine what kind of liberal you are, which can be very helpful when trying to discern how to approach a situation. It's a fun and easy read, but also very effective if you're wanting to score a few points for the Blue Team!
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars How To Win A Fight With A Conservative January 26, 2013
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
Absolutely loved it,could not put down read.Not just helpful but also hilarious,makes you laugh at yourself.Will buy How To Win A Fight With A liberal And Win because this was so entertaining ,just to see if Fight A Liberal is as informative and funny.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars For All Politics Junkies June 22, 2014
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
Now if I could only find a conservative that is even willing to talk to me! Seriously, this book combines a fine sense of humor with really useful advice. Perhaps it gives just a wee bit too much credit to the concept that there are conservatives who fight fair, but other than that, it's excellent. In any case, it's a lot of fun.
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34 of 48 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A welcome relief from rage July 31, 2007
I needed a laugh after spending so much energy feeling either helpless or enraged or both whenever I considered the state of our present administration. Both books are very funny, and I learned a few things, too. I wondered whether I could enjoy the companion book about winning fights with liberals, but I found it felt good to laugh at those guys too. My 10-year-old niece was fascinated by the Conservative Hall of Shame and eager to get the dirt on all the famous people she always heard adults in her life complaining about.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Purchased during the primary season February 16, 2013
By Linda
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
A friend recommended this book to me, and was happy to have it downloaded onto my laptop via the Kindle app and Amazon. Very enjoyable "book".
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
great book
Published 24 days ago by Archibald W Hutchinson
2.0 out of 5 stars I found no real meat here or useful constructs. I found just about...
I found no real meat here or useful constructs. I found just about zero that would be useful and it is just an embarrassing lefty rant. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Robert Potter Jr
3.0 out of 5 stars Political divide
Enjoyable, entertaining and frustrating read; the latter because of the moronic remarks and thought processes of these politicians. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Jon D. Zern, DVM
5.0 out of 5 stars Great
A quick read. Good points. Also a book How to Win A fight against a Liberal. I did not read that one.
Published 8 months ago by D Donald Snyder
1.0 out of 5 stars Total crap. However, worth reading for the laughs alone.
I chose this book just to see how how the libs really think. Wow, I found them crazier than I had originally thought. Read more
Published 10 months ago by Edward Effler
3.0 out of 5 stars I expected more
Not bad for a fun read but nothing spectacular about this book. I'd recommend looking elsewhere if you want something with more facts and less common knowledge and not so funny... Read more
Published 10 months ago by SueBhoney
4.0 out of 5 stars A funny book
This book pretty much nails it. You learn how to defeat a con with any argument. But the book is very funny because the truth can some times be very funny. Read more
Published 14 months ago by Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Serious and seriously funny.
While getting in a few jabs at Democrats/Liberals, he has the Tea Party types perfectly, right down to the last mindless cliche. Read more
Published 14 months ago by Mary Ann
5.0 out of 5 stars This book is a laugh fest
Takes Republican talking points and turns them on their heads. Plenty of wit to spare and hilarious counterpoints to every nitwit statements the conservative icons make. Read more
Published 16 months ago by Ron Gravelle
4.0 out of 5 stars How to Book
This is a great book to poke fun at the GOP and their ways of trying to run the world.
Published 17 months ago by James Blouch
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More About the Author

Daniel Kurtzman is a former Washington correspondent-turned political satirist who chronicles the absurdities of politics as editor of, the popular website that is part of The New York Times Company's network. An equal opportunity offender, Kurtzman is author of the dueling humor books, "How to Win a Fight with a Conservative" and "How to Win a Fight with a Liberal" -- the ultimate survival guides to arguing politics. His political commentaries and humor articles have appeared in The New York Times, San Francisco Chronicle, and The Huffington Post, among other publications. He has been widely cited as an expert on political humor by major media outlets around the country, while appearing as a commentator on CNN and ABC radio.

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