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Humanism for Parents - Parenting without Religion

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Sean P. Curley wants to offer parents who don't want to use religion as a tool for childrearing some other options. Given the scariness that can be seen in some religious doctrines and behaviors, it might be a worthy goal for some families. How good are Curley's suggestions in "Humanism for Parents: Parenting without Religion?"

The book is very short, only 87 pages long, and has 8 chapters with a conclusion and a list of resources. This is a general introduction to Humanism and parenting from a former minister, parent and grandfather.

The first three chapters explain Humanism, how morality should be defined from that perspective, and some basic guidelines and goals for parenting in the modern world. There is nothing really that new here, though if you are convinced that religion is necessary in order to be moral, you may be shocked, but then why would you be reaching for this book anyway?

Chapter four looks at how using traditions can help develop spirituality without the need for religion. Drawing from culture, biological and social development and even some religious practices, Curley offers several interesting ideas, never saying what you must do beyond feed your child's spiritual needs in some fashion.

The next three chapters explain why religious conflicts are problematic for the world and how to explain issues to different age groups. The questions and answers for younger children are good, but I found myself a bit offended by the set for older children when I tried to remember back to my teens and early twenties. I think wider reading and greater exposure to other choices would do just as much good, and this also encourages analytical thinking, which must be part of Humanism given Curley's repeated definition of it.

The final chapter looks at seven contemporary issues: Evolution; abortion; stem cell research; gay rights; global warming; neo-atheism; and theocracy and Christian nationalism. I really wanted more citations here and a deeper discussion of the conflicts between religions and Humanism and between Humanists themselves. This lends more realism to the problems and the possible solutions, plus it could be a great way to discuss these issues with older children and young adults who are open to Humanism or simply a more logical way of life.

I think that Curley touches upon several important considerations for all parents but in particular those who don't want to push religion on their children. Touching, though, is about all he does. Over and over I wanted more citations, more examples, more information. The book is a good start, but it is only a start.

While I love the idea that there are more and more resources for parenting children without religion, this book didn't do a whole lot for me. It's a short book, with a lot of space devoted to simply explaining Humanism. The author went from there to giving his opinion on some parenting issues, but there wasn't much meat to it. It would have been a nice essay, but as a book it left a lot to be desired. I would highly recommend Parenting Beyond Belief by Dale McGowan if you are looking for more substance. This book is a good primer though. Buy them both!

This is a straightforward guide that is well written and easy to read. The author has included a chapter for kids that helps to answer some of the questions children may have regarding Humanism, religion, science, etc., as well as another chapter for more inquisitive teens that answers many of the same questions in more detail. Also covered in this book are subjects dealing with Humanist philosophy, morality, traditions, and relevant social issues. The book is filled with helpful information, and includes many references for those who want to delve deeper into various subjects. Sean has written a book that should make it much easier for non-religious, Humanist parents to give their children a nurturing family life.

I decided to read this book because the title caught my eye - Humanism for Parents Parenting without religion. Seeing as how dh and I are of completely different religions we have chosen (for the most part) not to inflict religion into our kids lives. Is this good? Is this bad? Can't really say one way or the other as our children are still very young. I think it's more of the fact that we are in denial to make a concrete decision one way or the other. I have had no problems with him taking our son to his religious gatherings and he is cool so far with our kids attending a Christian preschool. But I wanted to know what this book was about and if I could use it to help us go through this parenting without inflicting religion into it.

So far I'm not sure that I got out of this book what I thought I would going into it. There were some ideas that I took away that weren't necessarily having anything to do with religion or the lack thereof in parenting. They are just common sense type things. For instance, he talked about when kids tattle and how you should teach them tattling to hurt someone is not good but tattling to help someone is ok.

I didn't really think this booked talked much about parenting let alone parenting without religion. It spoke mostly about what Humanism is and their thoughts and ideas. It didn't really mention much about how to use those ideals to raise your children. This book did have great questions and answers for parents to use when their kids start asking questions, but I don't define that as parenting. That is merely answering questions that raising your children as Humanists bring up. Don't get me wrong, the answers the author provides are great for those that want to raise their kids this way and give you as a parent a basis to start helping your child understand humanism but it in no way, explains how the parent is raising their child as a humanist.

Overall, I thought this book was a good read if you want to learn the basics about Humanism and what they think and their beliefs/structure. As far as a parenting book, I don't think this qualifies.

Humanism for Parents is a topic which isn't covered in many places, so this book is filling the gap.

Don't expect it to be an encyclopedia, but it contains a good deal of information and further reference on a range of essential topics like holidays and rites, social interaction, and also covers contemporary issues like gay rights, global warming and stem cell research.

The book is succinct and I very much enjoyed the reading. Recommended!

I found this book to be very helpful with ideas and advice on how to parent when you are not a Christian. The author explains how Easter and Christmas predate Christianity and were really harvest and farming festivals celebrating the spring equinox and winter solstice. An atheist, agnostic,or humanist should have no trouble celebrating these in there original tradition and spirit of thanks. The author discusses how to achieve some of the same experiences that the religious experience with out going to a Christian Church,(Singing, fellowsip, and learning etc.). I really found the chapters that are written for youngsters and teenagers very helpful in explaining to them my belief system. The book shows how to derive morals from society and what benefits yourself and others. He teaches the highest moral code, do good because it is the right thing to do, not from the threat of Hell or the reward of Heaven. The author also examines some of the most controversial issues of our time, abortion, global warming, homosexual marriage, and evolutionary science. I completely agree with the authors stances on all these issues, he is very knowledgeable and has really thought the issues completely through. The author Sean Curley has written a truly logical,rational, and compassionate book that shows the true beauty of Humanism and how to share it with your children.

There are several nonsensical myths permeating the American social and political body. One is that secular humanism is an invalid philosophy and that the fundamentals of ethics and morality can only be derived from religion. Humanists such as myself argue that in general, those who follow humanism are much more tolerant and accepting of other beliefs. Unfortunately, while many religions are based on fundamental principles of tolerance their practitioners utterly fail to execute it in their daily lives. Some of their primary themes have proven to be failures; the highly touted sexual abstinence program has not worked. The rate of sexually transmitted disease in American teenage girls is now at 25% and has been reported as being higher in the girls who have taken the vows of vaginal abstinence.
Curley offers an outline of how humanist parents can instill a moral and ethical code into their children, even in the face of societal and familial pressures. In some areas and families, the humanist position is the minority one; it can take a lot of personal courage to maintain it. There is a great deal of evidence to support the position that people raised in an environment where the mythical aspects of religion are downplayed and the societal benefits of compromise and aid to others emphasized are better citizens.
Religion without tolerance for other belief systems has only a short distance to travel before it becomes an instrument for evil. Jesus was a populist who preached aid and comfort to the sick and poor and he questioned the ultimate value of the blind pursuit of wealth. Humanists understand this better than many who claim to be religious and Curley offers a sound plan for injecting the moderation of humanism into the lives of children.

This slim volume (87 pages) is great for busy parents who want to share their moral values without religion as a guiding force. As a strong athiest, I despaired of breaking down complex information like evolution, why do some people believe in god, what happens when we die, etc, without the simplistic overview religion provides. This book helps to clarify humanist beliefs into a simple paragraph or two to give you a springboard in discussing these views with your child in a way they can understand.

The book also discusses morals, why to be good to others, and has a chapter towards the end on hot-button issues like abortion, stem-cell research, sex education, etc.

I loved the two chapters geared towards children and teens, respectively, that answered the most common questions in terms suitable for each age group. The teen one, of course, is a lot more depthy and philosophical.

I am glad to have read this book. I think that if you have time, it might be a wise choice to read The God Delusion in tandem with this, especially for parents of teens, because it says basically the same things only with much greater depth and beauty, but this is a good primer for those busy parents who do not have time for a long non-fiction book or who need help simplifying these concepts.

Mr. Curley's book, it must be granted, is written in an easily understandable and clear style, and the book can be read in a single sitting. However, the scope of the book is very basic, so much so that it really is less about teaching you how to raise a child in a humanist environment than it is about demonstrating that such a parenting choice is possible. Most of the questions discussed are very broad, and basically tried to make the single argument that what people consider the trademarks of a religious upbringing are possible in some form for humanists, such as group singing, "coming of age" rituals, and family gatherings. It is far too basic of a book to be of assistance to people who are already humanists and are consequently concerned with how to deal with parenting. After some consideration, it seems that the audience I would suggest this book to are those who are so complacent with their religion that they have never even considered that there are people out there who have grown up without religion. This is not meant cynically. There are more people than tend to admit who do not give thought to this issue, since they grew up in largely religious communities where it is automatically assumed that everyone else follows some religion. For this specific audience, the book is well suited, but unfortunately that is about all. However, in all fairness, the language of the book must be taken into consideration. The author's wording seems carefully chosen so as not to offend the religious reader, and he is very clear that the book is not about convincing people that they should be non-religious, but rather that it is to raise awareness that such a community and way of life is possible. The only demographic that could really take any offense to this book are Christian fundamentalist and literalists, since the book does discuss in brief why creationism is ridiculous. The one thing I did enjoy about this book, nevertheless, was the section that demonstrated how humanists tend to approach certain political issues, covering creationism, abortion, stem cell research, global warming, etc. His brief overview was inciteful, and is perhaps the most valuable part of the book. In conclusion, the book is not at all bad, but rather just not useful for what the title seemed to suggest. If you are looking for a brief introduction to humanism, supposing you have never heard of it before, this is the perfect book, but if you want a more detailed explanation on how to raise a child in a humanist household, this will only scratch the very surface.

Sean P. Curley, Humanism for Parents: Parenting Without Religion (Lulu, 2007)

I've been intrigued by this ever since I found out about it, so when I got a press release offering a free review copy, I jumped at the chance. I should start off by mentioning that I am not, either by my own definition or that used in the book, a Humanist; Curley writes early on that he hopes the book has a broader appeal among the non-religious. And despite some shortcomings (all of which have to do, thankfully, with "not enough" rather than "too much"), I, for one, am of the opinion that it does.

Curley's slim (88p.) book, first and foremost, avoids many of the traps one finds in vanity-published books; if he didn't have it professionally edited, he's got some friends who should be applying to Knopf and Doubleday. It's not just proofread better than at least half the major-label work I've seen this year, but whoever went over this did so with a fine enough comb (and a good enough memory) to have eradicated some of the other pitfalls of vanity nonfiction, the most common being repetition. (I make an exception, of course, for the two chapters in which he suggests answers for children/young adults of various age ranges.) Curley gets his points across in clear language, touches on most of the bases (including some I hadn't thought about), and examines a variety of religiously-based controversial topics from a nonreligious perspective. I saw a few differences in philosophy between the Humanist ideas and mine, but as Curley stresses, the opinions he's offering on controversial topics are not canon in any way; the reader is supposed to come to his own conclusions about stuff. And that can never be a bad thing.

The book's main sticking point with me, as I intimated above, is that it's so short. Curley could have easily doubled, or tripled, the length of this volume and still just scratched the surface. If he ever does decide to come out with a revised and expanded edition that gets into more of the history of some of the things he talks about, I'll be first in line to buy it. Until then, Humanism for Parents is a quick primer that will probably send you off in other directions to get more information; without it, though, you might not even know to look. Recommended. ***