and over one million other books are available for Amazon Kindle. Learn more
Buy Used
Condition: :
Comment: While this book has been loved by someone else, they left it in great condition. Hurry and buy it before someone else does and take advantage of our FREE Super Saver Shipping!!!
Have one to sell? Sell on Amazon
Flip to back Flip to front
Listen Playing... Paused   You're listening to a sample of the Audible audio edition.
Learn more
See all 2 images

The Hypochondriac's Pocket Guide to Horrible Diseases You Probably Already Have Paperback – December 13, 2005

See all 5 formats and editions Hide other formats and editions
Amazon Price New from Used from
"Please retry"
Library Binding
"Please retry"
"Please retry"
$16.99 $0.01

Best Books of the Year
See the Best Books of 2014
Looking for something great to read? Browse our editors' picks for 2014's Best Books of the Year in fiction, nonfiction, mysteries, children's books, and much more.

Hero Quick Promo
Gold Box Deal of the Day: Best-Selling Paranormal Series
Today only, books in the Vampire Academy and Bloodlines series by Richelle Mead are $2.99 each. Learn more

Product Details

  • Paperback: 208 pages
  • Publisher: Bloomsbury USA (December 13, 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1596910615
  • ISBN-13: 978-1596910614
  • Product Dimensions: 4.2 x 0.7 x 6.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (28 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #594,710 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Dennis DiClaudio is a humor and fiction writer, an improvisational comedian, and works in the editorial department at one of the world's largest medical and scientific publishing companies.

Customer Reviews

4.8 out of 5 stars
5 star
4 star
3 star
2 star
1 star
See all 28 customer reviews
Or, you just think your mom will really get a kick out of it.
These diseases are scary, sure, but through DiClaudio's masterful prose and dry sense of humor, medical education actually becomes enjoyable with this book.
Robert I. Hedges
I bought this for my husband as a Christmas gift and I had to read it before I wrapped it up.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback
Medical editor and improvisational humorist Dennis DiClaudio has written an amazing book. It is essentially a pocket guide to selected horrible, scary, and interesting diseases presented in a quirky, humorous way. These diseases are neatly organized by categories (autoimmune, fungal, genetic, etc.) and cover only the most unusual of dread diseases. Sure, the book covers some more commonly known diseases like leprosy, acromegaly, and furious rabies, but it really shines when discussing truly obscure maladies such as fatal familial insomnia, cyclic vomiting syndrome (which, while it may not kill you, will make you wish it had,) alien hand syndrome (which gets my vote for most unusual neurological condition of all time,) and amnesic shellfish poisoning, which will make you forget all about the prawns you just ate (as well as everything else, for that matter.)

While all of these diseases are horrible in their own way, the one I find to be the most singularly scary is candiru infestation. This is the nastiest thing I have ever heard of: if you swim in the Amazon or Orinoco rivers a small, slender species of catfish called the candiru, but better known as the vampire fish, likes to swim up your urethra and lodge itself in your urinary tract. This hurts a lot. Do not try to pull it out because (surprise!) it has rearward pointing barbs that unfurl like an umbrella that will make it more firmly ensconced in its new home, where it spends its hours running sharp grating teeth all over your most sensitive parts to make a meal of your blood. (Some men have decided to have an otherwise unthinkable type of surgical amputation to make the pain stop.
Read more ›
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
8 of 8 people found the following review helpful By TeensReadToo on February 25, 2007
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
First off, this is not a book for the faint of heart. It is, however, the perfect read for those with an off-the-wall sense of humor.

Mr. DiClaudio has compiled a list of forty-five of the most outlandish, obscure, and downright nasty diseases that you're likely to ever run across. Hopefully, on second thought, you'll never run across any of them, but in case you do, if you've read this book you'll at least be prepared for the horrid and totally disgusting ways with which you will suffer.

The diseases are broken up into categories, including Autoimmune, Bacterial, Genetic & Neurological, Idiopathic, Parasitic, Toxic & Fungal, and Viral & Prionic.

Although I found myself laughing hysterically at some of Mr. DiClaudio's observations, I sincerely hope to never find myself on the receiving end of these diseases. And, truth be told, I can't decide if I'd rather have worms living on my eyeball, having my flesh begin to decay while I'm still alive, or suffering from fatal familial insomnia (in which case, I'll never sleep again, and will probably spend my final waking hours wishing I had a disease as simple as worms living on my eyeball or having my flesh decay while I'm still alive).

Overall, a great way to spend a couple of hours. However, if you suspect you suffer from any of these forty-five diseases, you might want to actually see a doctor.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Geryjo on May 24, 2007
Format: Paperback
If you have the nerve, and are into perverse entertainment, this is the book for you -- or someone who will appreciate midnight black humor with a glossy blue sheen. We're talking forty-five horrifying ways that Nature is out to get you, with plenty of gruesome details on how she will succeed, and the pitiful or nonexistent steps you can take to protect yourself.

The writing is excellent. The author has a way with words, content aside. It really takes talent to make me laugh out loud, all the way through a book, especially when what I'm reading is also giving me cold sweats and an irregular heartbeat. I couldn't put the book down, and now I'm afraid to move or breathe. Other people have to get their thrills on mountain tops -- me, I can sit right here, white knuckled, waiting for unspeakable dangers to come to me. I am now regarding my cats and coworkers with suspicion -- no, outright terror.

Three days ago, I had no trouble making the leap from tiny flickering pain in my head to malignant brain tumor. Now I look at that self-diagnosis as a sign of childlike innocence. Do you have any idea how many truly unspeakable, debilitating, and deadly diseases start out with a simple rash or swelling? Numbness, coughing, itching, of course headaches, the list of innocuous symptoms is comprehensive, and all symptoms seem to lead to blindness and loss of body parts.

I find the ailment Fibrodysplasia Ossificans Progressiva, where your immune system decides to replace your sore muscles with bone, particularly insidious, although I feel better about not going to the gym now. Another favorite: Fatal Familial Insomnia, in which you never sleep again. (It's now 2 a.m. -- I'm feeling perky, and worried.) Furious Rabies, Norwegian Scabies, very bad.
Read more ›
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again
6 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Jay Freeman on February 26, 2006
Format: Paperback
I was in hysterics before I even left the book store. I read it aloud to my wife and sister who were totally disgusted with me. I think it must be read to oneself rather than aloud to others. Just be thankful if you don't have any of the 45 horrible diseases described in this book. Then stay awake wondering if you have any of the symptoms.
Comment Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
Thank you for your feedback. If this review is inappropriate, please let us know.
Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try again

Most Recent Customer Reviews

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, read author blogs, and more.