I Dream of Microwaves [Hardcover]

Imad Rahman (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: April 14, 2004

A bitingly funny debut story collection trails a Pakistani-American actor searching for a way to play himself in "real, actual life."

When B-movie-grade actor Kareem Abdul-Jabbar opens the mail one day, he find a one-way bus ticket to Cleveland and a note from his ex-girlfriend Eileen that reads, "Good news. I am through with big dicks and henceforth thinking constantly of you." So begin the linked misadventures of one of the most endearing ne'er-do-wells to grace recent American fiction.
Kareem drops his job portraying Hispanic criminals on America's Most Wanted and makes his way to Ohio, where he puts his dramatic skills to the test by impersonating a Bosnian refugee, in an attempt to help Eileen cash in on her grandmother's philanthropy. Such virtuosity can't last, however, and Kareem moves on, looking for a way to be himself when the camera isn't rolling. In one story, he pushes drinks as the Zima Zorro at the Ancient Mariner Sports Bar and Grill; in another he roughs up Unrepentant Privilege Abuse Perpetrators as a rental video repossessor. He returns to the theater, as stage manager to an incestuous Shakespearean troupe adrift in Pakistan, and as a Kilgore hell-bent on getting bumped up to Kurtz in a musical dinner theater production of Apocalypse Now. As he follows Kareem's quest for the big breaks in work and love, Imad Rahman explores the struggle for success and self-invention in contemporary life with originality, irreverence, and an absurdist wit that strikes unerringly close to the bone.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

In his smashing debut story collection I Dream of Microwaves, Imad Rahman navigates the world of marginal actors looking for work--and love--in quirky, unseemly venues. Following the travails of Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, a young Pakistani actor whose career highlight has been playing perpetrators in crime reenactments on America's Most Wanted, Rahman offers over-the-top episodes of astounding wit and hilarity, in no particular chronological order, as Kareem: finds work as a costumed hawker of a trendy drink at a dive bar where he battles a dwarven rival for the crowd's business; reprises Brando's role of Kurtz in a musical production of Apocalypse Now at the Steak 'N Stage dinner theatre; and partakes in his recurring girlfriend, Eileen's, plan to pry money from her philanthropic grandmother. In the latter, title story, Kareem pretends to be a Bosnian war survivor, pitted against Eileen's ruse. The B-listers recognize each other and, rather than tattle, enter into a duel of "acting one-upsmanship," telling increasingly grandiose stories of atrocity and third-world living. After joining a Shakespeare troupe stranded in Pakistan and watching their driver revive his van with a mouthful of gas, then immediately light a cigarette without incident, Kareem: "expected his head to pop off with a bang, flames bellowing out his open neck." Self-deprecating and funny, Kareem is a memorable thespian worth following around. --Michael Ferch

From Publishers Weekly

Rahman's deadpan first collection of eight linked stories gets off to a promisingly weird start when Pakistani-American actor Kareem Abdul-Jabbar receives a letter and a one-way bus ticket from Eileen, an old girlfriend, who announces she's "through with big dicks and henceforth thinking constantly of you." It's a great opening scene, and a taste of what's to come. Kareem's career as a stand-in on television crime dramas like America's Most Wanted has ground to a halt, so joining Eileen in Ohio could be the fresh start he's been craving. Instead, Kareem winds up at the dinner table debating the plight of Bosnia with Eileen's sister Cecilia and her cannibal husband from the South Pacific, then gets a surprise marriage proposal from Eileen. The interrelated stories that follow jump somewhat awkwardly back and forth in time. After being abandoned by now ex-wife Eileen due to his excessive drinking, Kareem begins a miserable stint as a Zima spokesman. In later installments, he walks dogs for Manhattan's elite and works as a repo man recovering unreturned video tapes along with fellow actor Valentina, a woman whose speech consists only of movie dialogue. Meanwhile, he lands roles in a musical version of Apocalypse Now and a low-brow production of Hamlet. Rahman sometimes flirts too strenuously with surreality, but his comic precision restores balance. These stories are top-notch novelty acts, delightfully witty, quirky fun.
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Product Details

• Hardcover: 256 pages
• Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux; First Edition first Printing edition (April 14, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0374174016
• ISBN-13: 978-0374174019
• Product Dimensions: 14.1 x 8.1 x 1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 13.9 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (12 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,725,094 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

21 of 21 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious!, May 13, 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: I Dream of Microwaves (Hardcover)

Absolutely hilarious! I was laughing out loud! It reads like a Pakastani version of Rikki Travolta's send up of Hollywood would-be actors 'My Fractured Life'. Naming the actor Kareem Abdul-Jabar was so irreverant and nonsensical it couldn't be funnier! You will laugh out loud, I promise. It has the same kind of funniness as 'My Fractured Life' and 'Postcards From the Edge.' Absolutely hilarious!

21 of 21 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Very Good, Similar to "MY FRACTURED LIFE", May 6, 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: I Dream of Microwaves (Hardcover)

Very similar in structure to Rikki Lee Travolta's "MY FRACTURED LIFE." This is a series of interconnected stories following the exploits of a fictional would-be B-movie actor as he sets off to become a "real person" in the "real world" only to find the world outside of Hollywood far more surreal than one might expect. Like "MY FRACTURED LIFE" each chapter can stand alone as a short story, but are expertly intermixed to tell one all encompassing tale. Although it lacks the dynamics and power of Travolta's fact-based account of the underbelly of Hollywood, fans of "FRACTURED LIFE" should be well entertained by Imad Rahman's "I DREAM OF MICROWAVES." A tandem, side by side read is probably the best bet for maximum enjoyment.

16 of 16 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Enjoyable, May 24, 2004

By A Customer

This review is from: I Dream of Microwaves (Hardcover)

In the same tradition as "My Fractured Life", "I Dream of Microwaves" is a fun stomping of Hollywood's B-list subculture. If you enjoyed "My Fractured Life" and "Running With Scissors" you should enjoy this.