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I Hate You, Kelly Donahue Paperback – Bargain Price, January 15, 2012

4.6 out of 5 stars 18 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

Review

"In this quippy, feverish love story in reverse, adman Svartz finds an incredible number of permutations within in limited premise and keeps his copy fresh throughout. This detailed replication of a personal journal may prove that revenge is best served droll."
--Time Out New York

"Mark Svartz's I Hate You, Kelly Donahue is surely like no other book I have ever read in my whole life. Svartz's book will be remembered for a long time. I give Svartz a lot of credit for writing a book in a new format. It is a brutally raw and honest account of one male's struggle with love. So, fasten your seat belt and get ready for a wonderful journey."
--Technorati/Blog Critics

About the Author

Mark Svartz is an author, artist, and award-winning advertising creative. Like most kids who were born and raised in Brooklyn, his lifelong dream was to write a book called "I Hate You, Kelly Donahue". Amazingly, he is the only one who succeeded. The others are all failures.

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 112 pages
  • Publisher: Adams Media; Spi edition (January 15, 2012)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1440527547
  • ISBN-13: 978-1440527548
  • ASIN: B008SLGODK
  • Product Dimensions: 0.8 x 6.2 x 7.5 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 14.4 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #3,135,414 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

By Wendy L. Hines VINE VOICE on March 4, 2012
Format: Spiral-bound
I Hate You, Kelly Donahue is written in a journal format. Mark talks about all of the ways he wants to kill Kelly Donahue, a co-worker. From a fight to the death to leaving her cupcakes so she dies from obesity, Mark is obsessed with getting rid of her. He draws diagrams of how the fight will go down, and is gleeful with his inventive ideas. When Kelly asks him out on a date, he is shocked. Does he go and consort with the enemy or does he turn her down? If he turns her down, she might be onto him. If he goes, he can turn it into his direction, plotting with the whole family involved. Hilarious! With great illustrations, ticket stubs, to-do lists and the roller coaster of one man's search for love and the demise of Kelly Donahue, this journal like book is full of laughter and imagination!
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Format: Spiral-bound
You've made a thing I wish I could've made. And I'm directing my latent self-hate at you. I hope you're feeling it right now. (If you're literally feeling a pain somewhere in your body though, get it checked. I don't have telepathic powers, so it's probably cancer.)

Jealousy aside, this vitriol-filled faux-journal is the best book I've ever read recently. I'm guessing it took me about an hour to finish, but it felt more like 20 minutes. Maybe 22. You will read it and re-read and re-re-read it in one sitting. I would say it's engrossing, but I'm not going to use such a pretentious word. Let's call it bewitching.

We all have or have had someone in our lives we've hated or at the very least disliked, and probably for a valid reason. What makes IHYKD so great is that we're captivated by this elusive reason the whole time. It's the carrot on the stick, and I love carrots. If you want to dig even deeper (you do), I think IHYKD is about the maelstrom of emotions one can feel when they set a goal, take the path towards that goal, then hit some unpredictable turns and potholes along the way. It's upsetting when a clear goal and plan becomes muddled. Maybe IHYKD is about adapting, letting yourself change your mind. Or maybe it's just a very sick, funny, engrossing book that shouldn't be analyzed.

You will enjoy this. I would say buy it. Or purchase it. You can use a credit card. After you buy it, read it. You will smile the whole time. I did because I take medication, but I'm pretty sure it will also do so naturally.

I love you I Hate You, Kelly Donahue.
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Format: Spiral-bound
I Hate You, Kelly Donahue: DO NOT OPEN! Nothing to See Here, Just Boring Stuff and Empty Pages is the ultimate little hater book. I was in the mood for something light and funny, and this book was perfect. I read it in one sitting, while giggling plenty of course.

This book is written in diary form, complete with sketches and photos, almost like a scrapbook. It all begins on January 7th, 2011 when author Mark Svartz starts working at a new job. He meets a co-worker named Kelly Donahue in the elevator and instantly dislikes her.
His journal chronicles most of his days over the next eight months as he shares his hatred of Kelly. He shares his plans for 'fighting her to the death' as well as other ways of getting 'rid of her'.

Okay, so while Mark Svartz seemed kind of obsessed with hating Kelly Donahue, I still found this book very amusing. I could definitely relate to disliking that annoying co-worker as I think most of us can, not as much as Mark of course.

What makes this book really funny is that it is completely absurd. He gives Kelly a red velvet cupcake in hopes of making her overweight since obesity is the #1 killer in the U.S.
Mark had me cracking up as he devised different ways to get rid of Kelly. He even wrote up a haiku for her tombstone.

"Kelly Donahue
Will no longer bother us.
Someone pass the chips."

I liked that this book actually in handwritten form, it gave it a nice touch. I felt like I was reading Mark's diary.
I Hate You, Kelly Donahue: DO NOT OPEN! Nothing to See Here, Just Boring Stuff and Empty Pages is the perfect read if you are looking for something quirky and different.

*I will mention there is foul language as well as x-rated drawings in this book, I know some readers don't enjoy that. On the other hand, other readers will be very intrigued to know that tidbit :P

I received my copy of this book for review online, and this is my honest opinion.
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Format: Spiral-bound
We've all had the experience. You start a new job and on the very first day, an attractive person says "hi" on the elevator and you decide right then and there that you will "physically defeat [her or him] in a physical fight to the death. Physically!" Before long, you find yourself spending the first twenty minutes of every workday staring at your adversary's name, trying to find the hidden anagram. If your adversary is Kelly Donahue, you find "Le Leaky Hound," which--of course--is French for "the crying dog."

In Mark Svartz 's hilarious book, I Hate You, Kelly Donahue, the author assumes the role of narrator (and Kelly Donahue hater) and keeper of a notebook in which he plans his victory over Kelly Donahue. Inside this spiral-bound book are handwritten notes and illustrations describing why Kelly Donahue must die, how boring she is, how revolting and evil she is, and how he's going to send her to her grave (if, when he's through, there are large enough remains to bury).

I Hate You, Kelly Donahue is the diary of a psychopath, but a dim-witted, juvenile one who probably couldn't carry out his dastardly design since most of his ideas are dumb, cartoonish, or impossible. In fact, he's so inept that the diary can't even be considered "dark humor," it's more a funny shade of gray. It's the kind of funny that has the reader laughing out loud and rereading absurd passages.

Mark Svartz incorporates social media, Wikipedia, Craigslist, Google Maps, texting, and sly references to popular culture into I Hate You, Kelly Donahue, producing a creative, relevant story that could be--if you really think about it--just a little bit creepy. Give a copy to that friend with a slightly twisted sense of humor. (Publication date: January 15, 2012)

By the way, if you decide that I (Bob Etier) am the person you must physically defeat (physically!), be warned that my name anagrams to "be or bite." And I'm ready for you.
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