Customer Reviews

I Loved You First

5 star:		(4)
4 star:		(12)
3 star:		(3)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Alex is a typical college freshman with a crush on a guy. The only problem is that Seth has been her best friend since high school and, he's gay.

Alex Carmichael has been Seth Richard's sidekick, lackey, almost-invisible gossip buddy at all the good parties and his faithful standby through high school, hoping that one day he will feel the same way about her that she feels about him. Even though Seth begins to date cheerleader Cheyenne to keep up appearances, he is not supportive of the time that Alex spends with Dink, the football player interested in her, and Alex is hesitant to accommodate anyone other than Seth into her schedule.

Apart from a couple of typos and lack on consistencies in events, author Reena Jacobs Jacob's writing is natural and the story flows. Jacobs' inspiring message about the beauty of accepting yourself and others for whom they really are is perceptive and touching. Alex is a believable heroine, hiding in the shadows of the one she loves, and reluctantly realizes that her best friend is not making the best choices for her, but for himself alone. Alex learns to readjust her priorities so that she is no longer an unappreciated sidekick, but an individual who surrounds herself with people who like her for who she is in her own right. Alex learns that she can be a loyal friend without sacrificing her dignity. Seth is the credible closet homosexual trying to juggle the stereotypical football player image with his sexuality. By releasing his hold over Alex, he not only allows her to flourish, but he is left to reveal the truth of his identity to his friends and loved ones and learn true self-acceptance.

I Loved You First is about love, loyalty and acceptance of others, but also of oneself. An encouraging read for young adults.

Also by the same author: Shadow Cat (The Striped One)

Reviewed by Maya Fleischmann for IndieReader

I Loved You First was a beautiful book about unconditional friendship between a boy and girl, although Seth seemed to be a little more self-centered than Alex. He was the drama queen of the relationship. The book aptly depicted how some friendships keep you confined in a very small place, never allowing "you" to be "you".

Seth was, plain and simple - a drama queen. He came across as self-centered person caught up in his masquerade, seeming not to notice that he was suffocating the one person who cared the most for him.

Alex, devoted in every way to her BFF, Seth, did not mind being Seth's sidekick until college. After a football/frat boy begins paying attention to her and telling her that she is noticed. She cannot appreciate the attention because she is love with Seth, her gay friend. Alex begins to want the individualism she has denied herself through the years. She begins to explore dating and realizes that she enjoys the male attention.

Alex also befriends a girl from one of her classes. Seth has consumed her world and this is all new to her - as many young adults figure out once they begin college.

College is a time of discovery, a transition time from childhood into adulthood. It is a time where we discover who we are; a time when new friendships are forged and we begin to blossom into the adults we are meant to become. The book was a good depiction of college life and the growing pains and changes that we go through. It was a good story and I think many people will enjoy the book.

This was a read that took me by surprise. I did not know what to expect when I started reading and the whole story was delightful and thought provoking. This is more straight fiction though the characters are trying for romance in their lives.

It is a shorter story about two friends who have grown up together and are now in their first year of college with the college campus as the backdrop of the story. As in most coming of age stories, they must learn to meet their issues head on and grow from it. The heroine is secretly in love with her best friend and he is secretly gay and trying to appear before the world as straight. One night, the truth comes out and their lives are radically altered.

I know some people have a hang-up about reading first person, but I thought in the case of this story which was about following the internal growth of the heroine, Alex, that it was the proper voice to use. I loved how at the beginning she was a pitiful and sad girl, but by the end, she was someone that even she could be proud of.

Recommend!

Alexandria is in love with someone who has no chance of loving her back-at least in the way she would like. Seth, her best friend, is gay. Their friendship is sweet, they have been friends for many years and Alexandria does not intend to throw away their friendship over her crush. Alex knows that Seth is not straight, but she is the only one and is forced to watch the parade of girls that Seth dates more for a show than anything else. The reader will enjoy understanding the motives behind Seth's actions as well as Alex's thoughts along the way. Alex's heart is silently breaking, can she move on?

Alex's character is fun. She can be a little self-pitying, but she is overall a character the reader can connect to. Seth is a little harder to like as the reader knows he is lying to himself and to others, regardless of the reasons. The other characters, especially Alex's later on love interests, are interesting and are a tad on the stereotypical side-as the reader was told to expect. The events were quick, it is college after all, there is a lot to read about and the author covers the most stereotypical aspects of college. The writing was smooth, the reader isn't left feeling confused. This book is recommended to young adult/adult readers.

An enjoyable read that will get you thinking about how well do you really know someone. A person will never know how brightly they can shine until they leave the shadows behind.

So, when I sat down to read this, I wasn't captured instantly. I like to have an honest review so I'm giving it. It wasn't my favorite novel.....in the beginning, that is. Once I pushed past the beginning where it wasn't capturing my attention, I really got into the heart of the story. Sure, the story is about Alex and her gay best friend, Seth, but it's also so much more than that.

Deep in the heart of the story, it's about life. It's about being true to your self no matter what. I dig that. I really do. I can't imagine the turmoil that Seth went through when he "came out", or what Alex had to endure knowing that Seth, her best friend, the person she turns to for everything, is gay. Yet, she still loves him. That would just eat me up and tear me up in side.

In today's world, being gay is both easy, and not so easy. Years ago, being a gay teen just wouldn't cut it. You HAD to pretend no matter what that you weren't gay. That could get bad. Today, though, you can announce to the world that your gay, and you'd have less of a hassle. That's what Seth went through. Though Seth wasn't my favorite character, he was chiseled well for the role he played. I loved Alex though. Bless her, I felt for her. She just wanted Seth to know that she was in love with HIM, no matter that he was gay. She wanted him to know that he was the one her hearted called to, yet she couldn't. He didn't return her affections.

Teens today go through so much turmoil and emotional drama that it's not hard to realize how REAL this book could be. It's definitely a 4 Book worthy eye opener that young adults everywhere should read. It's a good lesson in acceptance, love, life and friendships. This is a truly emotional whirl wind of a ride and I recommend it to everyone out there. Great job, Reena!

What I didn't expect when I first started reading was the emotional turmoil that the characters have to face.

What I liked: 1) The concept. I really appreciate unrequited love, because I've had many unrequited crushes in my life. Not any that are as long-lived as Alex's for Seth, but still. I'm totally able to empathize, and it's clear that Miz Jacobs knows how to write those emotions clearly and concisely. 2) Alex 2.0. I liked Alex a lot near the end, when she finally was figuring out what she wanted and wasn't afraid to take it, instead of standing in the shadow of someone else. There was a really great transformation that took place throughout the book and it gave me as a reader a lot to think about. 3) The concept of the university they were attending. I went to a big state school (Go POKES!) and it was nothing like this one. Particularly in regards to their dorms! Those were some fancy digs! 4) Real problems. There were some very real issues that teens/college kids/even adults have to face sometimes in this book, and Miz Jacobs didn't gloss over them. She hit them head on and I really liked that she gave real answers to kids who may be dealing with these situations.

What I didn't like: 1) I didn't like how much Seth took Alex for granted. And how she just let him do that. I think it needed to happen in the course of the book, but I'm just like, dude. Stop being a jerk.

Overall thoughts: There is a lot of tough stuff in this book. It's not a light read. But all the issues are written very well and dealt with appropriately. It is a story of unrequited love and learning to live with less than ideal circumstances, so don't expect to find a shiny, happy ending for everyone. But it is a great story to get into, in a very realistic, less-than-perfect world. I think that was my favorite thing about it. That everything didn't end in one nice neat package, but it was very satisfying.

One could be forgiven for assuming this novel would be the worst sort of politically correct garbage based upon the premise: girl secretly in love with her BFF who just happens to be gay -- yeah, yeah, cue the sad violins. However, very much to Ms. Jacobs' credit, it is not. In fact this is a thoughtful (and thought provoking) novel about the timeless problem of unrequited love, its costs, its consequences, and the necessity of finally dealing with it in a clear-eyed fashion. The homosexual angle is merely a modern complication on an old, old theme, though it did pretty much rule out any surprise happy ending.

In addition it is very much to Ms. Jacobs' credit that she has the guts to portray a less than attractive gay character, especially in this day and time. A one word summation of said secretly gay BFF Seth Richards' character would be "selfish". Oh, he has better excuse for selfishness than most, but that's all it is, an excuse. In order to maintain his cover Seth is a serial emotional abuser of the young women who are attracted to his considerable good looks, stringing them along for awhile and then dumping them like yesterday's garbage, apparently without any trace of remorse. Now to his credit Seth refuses to so use his BFF Alex Carmichael (even though she wants him to), but he doesn't hesitate to use her in other ways or to take advantage of her affections. Even his motivations for staying in the closet are primarily selfish: in order to make things easier for him in his dealings with (and showering with) his teammates, and if his seemingly planned coming out of the closet upon his sports career retirement were to cause former teammates any grief, there's no reason to believe selfish Seth would give them a second thought. Even Seth's disastrous "outing" is the logical (though of course unjustified) consequence of his selfishness; he finally uses and abuses a girl who decides to get even instead of just getting mad.

(Frankly, in this incident IMHO Ms. Jacobs' is a little bit guilty of stacking the sympathy deck in favor of Seth. If a heterosexual boy even under the influence of something he did not knowingly ingest were to do what Seth did to a girl instead, would we not call it sexual assault? And if she had kicked him in the groin when he was incapacitated, how much sympathy would readers have felt for him?)

That aside throughout the book Ms. Jacobs handles the issues and her characters a whole lot more evenhandedly than one could possibly have expected these days. Only at the very end does she get a little bit preachy (and, no, I'm not talking here about her "Afterwards") and fail a bit in fairness, when she fails IMHO to cut her football players the necessary slack. To put it bluntly, people forced by circumstances to get naked in front of strangers are ENTITLED to be a little uncomfortable with homosexuality. They're not entitled to beat anybody up, of course, but it isn't right to turn people in that situation into sex objects against their will or without their knowledge, else we'd compel the cheerleaders to shower with the football team. (Football players might like that so much they'd quit whining about having to shower with gays. Cheerleaders? Probably not so much.)

Later, in the aforementioned "Afterwards", Ms. Jacobs gets even more preachy, and I don't have a problem with most it, but I have some nits to pick. Yes, it is a terrible sin to hate homosexuals, clearly every bit as much a sin as it is to hate people who believe homosexual behavior to be sinful. (H'm, I wonder which sin is the more prevalent today? Might be kind of close.) However, Ms. Jacobs is wrong when she suggests that Christians are simply supposed to ignore it. Though clearly not the worst of sins, homosexual behavior is one of the most often condemned sins in the Bible. (It is almost as if the Bible was inspired by an omniscient God who somehow knew that one day homosexual behavior would be the first sin with an advocacy group, and He wanted to make His position on the subject crystal clear.) It is not of course the duty of Christians to judge homosexuals, but as part of our duty to lead people to Christ, it is necessary to point out and condemn the sins that make Christ's salvation necessary in the first place, especially when said sins are approved of by society. (Christians needn't spend a lot of time condemning theft and murder. Most non-Christians "get it", probably even most thieves and murderers "get it", but homosexuality is another matter. When the modern world says that homosexual activity is "just another lifestyle", Christians must respond that, according to the Bible at least, it is just another sin for which the penalty is eternity in Hell. We should do so in love rather than anger of course, but we should certainly continue to do so.

Ms. Jacobs is also wrong when she contends that providing equal rights to the LGBT community is not detrimental to our families because, leaving aside the whole touchy area of what providing such "equal" rights might mean or result in, HOW the LGBT community is going about getting those rights is EXTREMELY detrimental to our families and to ALL of our rights because LGBT activists are "cheating" by relying on judicial activism.

As contrast, remember how women got the right to vote in this country; they got an amendment to the Constitution passed, despite being unable to vote for any of the people who would have to make this happen. They had to do this because the Constitution as written clearly did not grant women the right to vote so it was necessary to go through the long, arduous process our founders set up for changing the Constitution (and thus protecting it from sudden whims and political winds). Facing this, it is awful tempting to resort to the backdoor method of constitutional change: get a majority of supreme court justices to misuse the power of judicial review in order to pencil in anything they want (and cross out anything they don't like). Besides being SO much easier, this method also prevents your opponents from easily doing anything about your shameless shredding of the Constitution unless they are willing to stoop to your level...

or below it. That was the problem presented by the most outrageous case of judicial activism in US history: not Roe v. Wade, but Dred Scott v. Sandford. In this infamous case a slavery sympathizing Supreme Court majority took the opportunity of a challenge to the Fugitive Slave Act in order to invalidate all of the congressional compromises limiting the spread of slavery into new states, thus leaving the slavery opposing majority of Americans with no legal, political(, or peaceful) recourse, so they were forced to find another one.

Sure enough some number of years and 600,000+ dead later Dred Scott v. Sandford was finally overturned. Now, it is unlikely that any possible upcoming judicial activist Supreme Court rulings will come at quite this high a price, but if you think you've seen hostility to the LGBT community's agenda before, wait until some future judicially activist Supreme Court pencils in gay marriage on the entire country over the overwhelming opposition of the people every time they've been given a chance to vote on it.

Constitutional amendment passages tend to settle issues; judicially activist cram downs tend not to. (Remember how well Roe v. Wade "settled" the issue of abortion?) In addition Supreme Courts that are able to "make up" stuff you agree with are also able to "make up" stuff you disagree with when your opponents get control of them as they inevitably will. Finally, oft oppressed minorities would be wise not to trade the protections offered by a written constitution in favor of an uncertain future in which their rights will be determined by whomever currently has judicial control over the Etch A Sketch of the United States.

Note: For full disclosure I received this ebook in return for agreeing to review it.

We have been friends together In sunshine and in shade. - Caroline Sheridan Norton

Alexandria Carmichael and her BFF Seth have known each other since first grade. Alex, though, has fallen in love with Seth over the years and secretly pines for him. it would have been less complicated or perhaps simpler for her to deal with her feelings if Seth were not gay but he is.

author Reena Jacobs has written a beautiful and bittersweet young adult coming-of-age story that deals with friendship, love, bigotry and self-discovery. set in a college campus, it introduces the reader to football jocks, campus queens and slices of academic and dormitory life. the characters are well fleshed out and the language is fresh and contemporary. situations and emotions echo humor and pathos which readers can relate to regardless of sexual preference, race and even religious affiliation.

Alex's unrequited love and Seth's attempts to "stay in the closet" bring drama and conflict which caught my attention from the story's beginning to its unexpected conclusion.

overall, this is a wonderful book about people falling in love and finding themselves a place in the world where they could grow, be happy and simply be free.

Disclosure of Material Connection: i received a copy of I Loved You First from the author herself. i did not receive any payment in exchange for this review nor was i obligated to write a positive one. all opinions expressed here are entirely my own and may not necessarily agree with those of the author, the book's publisher and publicist or the readers of this review. this disclosure is in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255, Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.

Alex is used to being in the shadow of her best friend Seth. He's out-going and popular. Seth is the kind of guy all the girls fall for, including Alex. There's just one huge problem. Seth is gay. Alex knows this, but no one else does. She is about to learn how hard it is to keep someone's secret, and how hard it is when you fall for the wrong person. Can Alex learn to be her own person and step out of Seth's shadow? Also, can she learn to deal with her feeling about Seth?

This book is a very modern and different take on your typical love story. Alex falls for someone completely right for her in some ways, but it's incredibly hard because she knows Seth will never be able to return her feelings. On top of that, Alex never feels like her own person. She has a hard time separating herself from her identity as Seth's side-kick. As Alex begins to branch out and try to figure out who she is, she realizes that things between her and Seth cannot stay the same.

I found Alex to be a very interesting and complex character. I was very happy for her as she began to discover that she could in fact be a good friend and find out what she wanted in life. I was sad for her as she struggled with her feelings for Seth. The end gave me great hope for her and her future. If you are looking for a quick read that's a change from your usual love story, then look no further. This book is entertaining to read while still managing to give you some things to think about.

Book provided by author for review.