Idiot Letters [Paperback]

Paul Rosa (Author)

Book Description

Release date: March 1, 1995

Look out, public relations; take cover, customer service -- Paul Rosa's letter is in the mail and his inventively imbecilic queries about consumer products have a way of eliciting equally idiotic and even more unlikely answers from some of America's biggest companies.

Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

Look out, public relations; take cover, customer service -- Paul Rosa's letter is in the mail and his inventively imbecilic queries about consumer products have a way of eliciting equally idiotic and even more unlikely answers from some of America's biggest companies.

From the Inside Flap

Look out, public relations; take cover, customer service -- Paul Rosa's letter is in the mail and his inventively imbecilic queries about consumer products have a way of eliciting equally idiotic and even more unlikely answers from some of America's biggest companies.

Product Details

• Paperback: 160 pages
• Publisher: Main Street Books; 1st edition (March 1, 1995)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 038547508X
• ISBN-13: 978-0385475082
• Product Dimensions: 9.7 x 6.9 x 0.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (29 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #720,102 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

15 of 16 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Get this book if you want to laugh!! February 23, 2001

By Kaspy

Format:Paperback

This is one of the funniest books I've ever had the fortune to stubmble upon, it had me laughing out loud, which is quite rare. In his outrageous book Paul Rosa crafts numerous letters to corporations, from the perspective of an idiot. Also included in the book are the responses from the companies.

One of his letters is to the m&m company, in which he complains that their slogan "Melts in your mouth, but not in your hands" is discriminatory and insensitive to those who don't have one or more hands. He then goes on to explain how he lost his arms in an encounter with a grizzly bear, and suggests that they change their slogan to "Melts in your mouth but not in your hand(s) (if you have any)." Other examples are letters to:

McDonald's - Says he's been eating at McDonald's every day since he was a kid and now weighs over 600 pounds. He then wants to know if he should be concerned about his health.

Guinness Book of World Records - Claims to have carried his cat (Jesse) for years without ever putting him down, and wants to know if it's a world record.

Johnson and Johnson - Tries to sell his "invention", which consists of a three-pronged Q-tip, claiming that two swabs for each Q-tip aren't enough, and that using two is a waste, since he only uses one side of the second one ("saving the Q-tip seems barbaric"). He inlcudes a crude sketch of his idea and labels it "schematic"

What really endeared me to this charming book is that Paul Rosa is such a gifted writer, he has a certain way with words that makes reading his letters a delight (in one letter he emotionally writes "tears of joy are decorating my keyboard even as I type" to the manufacturer of Cat's Pride cat litter....)

Almost as funny are some of the responses he gets, although most are usually short and formal cookie-cutter repsonses. Nevertheless, it's satisfying to know that people actually read his ridiculous letters and had to dignify them with a response.

Refreshingly creative and witty, this book will have you smiling long after you've finished reading it. Read more ›

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars By far the best book in our bathroom April 8, 2000

By Dan Craddock

Format:Paperback

Forget the small versions of Life's Little Instruction books that we all find in our friends bathrooms. This book will keep your guests in the powder room for hours! I have read this book to myself and to groups of people on an airplane. It is addictive. Paul Rosa has an incredible way of developing a character within the first two sentences of a short letter. You will want to introduce this book to everyone you know.

It is definately deserving of the top 50,000 Amazon.com ranking that it received! I would go as far as to put it in the top 40,000.

31 of 38 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Hail Paul Rosa! January 10, 2001

By David S. Merrill

Format:Paperback

I found Idiot Letters when I worked at a bookstore (I'm not saying which). I first picked up the book thinking it was the latest in the Where's Waldo series. I read the book while I stood at the cash register. I laughed so hard and loud that I received many complaints from our patrons. After many disciplinary actions I was finally dismissed. I cashed my final paycheck and with my remaining $22.67 (after taxes), I ran to a competitor's bookstore and bought Idiot Letters immediately. I was in heaven! I spent the next 3 weeks isolated in my studio apartment. I would read each letter over and over, howling each time as if it were my first reading. But that's not the end of my story. Proceed to paragraph 2, my friends.

Since my purchase of Idiot Letters (about 3 weeks ago), my life hasn't been the same. I now speak and write in the same manner as Paul Rosa (albeit, not nearly as articulately). He has become my personal savior and in my house I have built a shrine in his honor. I have 2 dogs and a cat and I have named them Paul, Paulina and Rosie. Over-the-top fanaticism you ask? I think not.

If you're thinking of buying someone the perfect gift, apart from a Volvo Station Wagon (a very safe car indeed), I recommend Idiot Letters. This book won't disappoint. And by the end, you may find yourself writing your own "idiot letters" (or at least "idiot Amazon reviews").

6 of 6 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Not for those with a weak bladder! July 28, 1998

By A Customer

Format:Paperback

I picked this up off a friends coffee table at a party and began laughing so hard that the flood of tears of comic euphoria began to drench the pages of the book. My wife struck a deal with me, put it down, and I could buy it the next day, which I did! This is the funnies thing I have ever read in my entire life (and I have read a lotta stuff). An absolute MUST have!

PS Paul, if you read this please send me an XL T-shirt!

6 of 7 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars So many complaints, so little time... September 13, 2001

By tom r

Format:Paperback

I picked this book up just yesterday in the Humor section of a local bookstore while reading some Far Side comics. I didn't expect to read Paul C. Rosa's Idiot Letters much since I am a big fan of Larson's comics. However, I found myself reading letter after letter written by Paul on his "relentless assault on Corporate America." This collection of letters written by Paul during 1993 is an example of comedic genius. Paul Rosa wrote to a plethora of corporations that head various franchises/products. Each letter follows the same basic format -praise for the company/product, obscure questions/concerns, and finally a humorous closing of anticipation for a response. However, Paul makes each letter unique by addressing his humorous questions/concerns specifically to a company's product, or in the case of a letter to CITGO, an advertisement. Paul wrote a letter to the Consumer Relations departement of CITGO concerning an actual advertisement by company. In the advertisement, a Bald Eagle hovers, for the lack of a better term, over a CITGO station with its wings fully extended. The eagle is digitally made as large as the gas station and the advertisement reads (not accurate): "Get a ahold of the power" or something like that. Paul writes to the company as a idiot and expresses concern and fear of such a large animal flying over his home state of Colorado. He writes that he and his wife are both concerned and says he will take action if needed to protect himself and his family from this "monster". He mentions that he will use his gun however, "it'll take a canon to take this it down!" CITGO's response? Well, that's for you to find out by reading Idiot Letters.