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If You Stay (Beautifully Broken) [Kindle Edition]

Courtney Cole
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (669 customer reviews)

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Book Description

A New York Times and USA Today Bestseller....


24-year old Pax Tate is an asshole.

Seriously.

He's a tattooed, rock-hard bad-boy with a bad attitude to match.
But he's got his reasons.

His mother died when Pax was seven, leaving a hole in his heart filled with guilt although he doesn't understand why. What he does know is that he and his dad are left alone and with more issues than they can count.

As Pax grew up, he tried to be the kid his father always wanted; the perfect golden boy, but it didn't work. His dad couldn't overcome his grief long enough to notice and Pax couldn't keep up the impossible perfect façade.
So he slipped far, far from it.

Now, he uses drugs and women to cope with the ugliness, the black void that he doesn't want to deal with. If he pretends that the emptiness isn't there, then it isn't, right?
Wrong.

And it's never more apparent than when he meets Mila.

Sweet, beautiful Mila Hill is the fresh air to his hardened frown, the beauty to his ugly heart. He doesn't know how to not hurt her, but he quickly realizes that he'd better figure it out because he needs her to breathe.

When memories of his mother's death resurface from where he's repressed them for so long, Mila is there to catch him when the guilt starts making sense. Mila is the one...the one who can save him from his broken troubled heart; from his issues, from the emptiness.

But only if he can stop being an asshole long enough to allow it.

He knows that. And he's working on it.

But is that enough to make her stay?

**Please note: If You Stay contains mature subject matter such as drug use and sexual situations. It is intended for mature audiences.**


Editorial Reviews

Review

"I loved If You Stay. Like, really really loved it. The kind of love that kept me reading until 2:40 am and left me crying, smiling, devastated, and elated. The best kind of book love." - Andrea, The Bookish Babe


"Beautiful, raw, gritty, emotional and breath-taking are just a few of the words I can find to describe this book...reading this book was one of the best experiences I have had." -Amanda, Globug and Hootie Need a Book

About the Author

Courtney Cole is a New York Times and USA Today bestselling author who lives near Lake Michigan with her family.  She's always working on her next project... or staring dreamily out her office window.  To learn more about her, please visit courtneycoleauthor.com

Product Details

  • File Size: 439 KB
  • Print Length: 352 pages
  • Publisher: Lakehouse Press (February 7, 2013)
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B00BD9HOY2
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #358,952 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
87 of 95 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars LOVED LOVED LOVED this book!!!!!! February 9, 2013
Format:Kindle Edition
First, I have to say a HUGE THANK YOU again to Courtney Cole for providing me an ARC copy of her book. I was lucky enough to win an autographed copy in one of her contest and to say I was excited is an understatement!!

I LOVED Pax. He immediately grabs at your heart strings. He is broken and makes you want to fix him. He is sexy as hell too! And oh, some of the things he says and does in the book! There are a few favorites I have. One is nude painting. Then there is the big bad wolf. And one of my favorite lines..

"You've seen me at my worst. Maybe you should see me at my best."
"When are you at your best?"
"In bed."

But Pax is far from perfect. He is a seriously f'ed up individual. He uses drugs and women to numb the emptiness he feels. But I will give him credit for being honest about it. Make no mistake, he is in your face honest and makes no apologies for it.

Mila is the light in Pax's dark world. From the moment he meets her, he begins to make some serious changes in his life. At first, she is scared to pursue whatever this thing between them is. She knows about the drugs and women, she has seen both up close and personal, and is scared of what a relationship with Pax would mean for her.

I loved the chemistry between Pax and Mila. I read so many stories where there is this instant attraction between the characters and it jut doesn't seem believable. I am not sure if it was the circumstances in which Pax and Mila meet or not, but I could feel the connection with them. And I appreciated the fact that she wasn't trying to fix him. She wanted him to be the one to fix himself. I think that was important because anyone in Pax's situation has to want to make changes in order for them to stick.
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16 of 18 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars It was good. February 12, 2013
By SK
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
It was hard to like Pax, the bad-boy-trust-fund slacker, when we first meet him. On the very first page, he's strung out on coke and pills and JD and a girl whose name he can't remember is giving him a BJ in his car. Mila finds him shortly thereafter, OD'ing in his car and saves his life. Truthfully, I give her huge props because I don't know how she did CPR with orange vomit all over him. Ugh!

So you'd think after this, he'll have an epiphany of some kind and become worthy of Mila but he doesn't. In fact, his behavior doesn't get much better for a while. It was pretty off-putting to me. It wasn't really clear what Mila saw in him. He was totally hot--she kept saying how beautiful he was. But it didn't seem like that was enough for good-girl Mila to give such a total screw-up a shot (more than once).

Anyway, if we choose to ignore the implausibility of that, the rest is okay. Each chapter switches back and forth between their perspectives, which I always like, and was well done here. Their relationship progresses pretty well, sex scenes are good without being as medically detailed as in some books. I even thought the disclosure and handling of Pax's past was done realistically and in an exciting way. That chapter was definitely a page-turner. Though his recovery seemed somewhat quick. Of course, it was a short book (only 85% of the kindle file is this book--don't know what that translates to in pages). So I guess they had to wrap things up.

It was a quick read, I read it in a few hours. But it seemed like something was missing. I'm not sure what it was--but there were very few characters. I came away with the impression that this small town was actually minuscule.
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20 of 25 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Love Pax February 9, 2013
Format:Kindle Edition
I have read every single book that Courtney Cole has written and loved every single one of them. If you Stay tops the list, hands down. I was excited when she decided to start writing NA and fell in love with Pax immediately. He's not your typical book boyfriend. You know the one you fall for immediately because he sweeps the girl off her feet. I fell in love with Pax from the beginning even when he was an ass. I think that's part of the draw to him. The bad boy who uses to cope and hides behind the façade of being an douche, but the thing is like Mila saw there's always something amazing hiding underneath.
This book was raw and emotional. Absolutely perfect not to mention something completely new and unexpected from Courtney Cole, I LOVE IT!

"Even when I can count on nothing else, I can always count on this."

We are introduced to Pax in a pretty effed up state. He's getting busy in his car with some chick he doesn't remember her name till later on. Mila stumbles upon him at the worst time but the best possible time as well. She happens to save his life. Pax doesn't think he's good enough for Mila and Mila thinks Pax is going to break her heart. But they both take the chance. They plunge into the unknown with open arms because their attraction only intensified.
"The stars twinkle overhead, the lake is soundless and calm to our left

and for the first time in as long as I can remember, I feel like I'm home."

So what do they do? They date. It a beautiful disaster but a learning process for the both of them. Pax is starting to have nightmares and Mila wants to do whatever it takes to help him. So what happens? Does Pax get passed his coping mechanisms? Can Mila learn to trust Pax enough to know he won't her...again?
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing page-turning story. Loved Pax!
*I received this book as a free giveaway from the publisher for a review*

If You Stay is a sweet and steamy romance told primarily from Pax's POV (but also switches to... Read more
Published 4 days ago by Marie Long
5.0 out of 5 stars Nocturne: Raw and Real... This book blew me away
This book blew me away! A story of struggle, heartache, and redeeming love, I truly was entranced by this novel. Read more
Published 5 days ago by Nocturne Reads
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing, romantic yet painful story, very real, love the characters!
Wow, what a book. Pax really is an ass at least at first and Mila is so sweet and innocent. But this story really changes everything and I read it in an afternoon and loved... Read more
Published 15 days ago by Crystal Fulcher
3.0 out of 5 stars Entertaining, but not all that...
Entertaining book, but not something that will stick in my head for the rest of my life. I finished it, but I was able to put it down.
Published 29 days ago by LittleKT
3.0 out of 5 stars Good premise, a little bit preachy
Not a bad book. Not an awesome book, but I didn't skip pages to often. Yes, we are taken on the path if a man who is fighting his demons. Read more
Published 1 month ago by Mellyhawk
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Story
It's hard to find a story like this now. I loved this book. It was HOT and still had a great story line. I'd highly recommend this.
Published 1 month ago by JB
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book
Loved it!!! Went well along with the authors personal story and showed how people can overcome struggles and turn for the good. Read more
Published 1 month ago by kristin
5.0 out of 5 stars great story
Loved it ! Great Love story of how true love brought to broken people together. Pax was saved from his destructive path and Milan learned love never fails! Read more
Published 2 months ago by Bridget
1.0 out of 5 stars Yawn (Spoilers Beware)
I picked this up because it was on a list that Willow Aster's - True Love Story was on. Needless to say it doesn't even come close. Read more
Published 2 months ago by mkb
5.0 out of 5 stars Just read
What a Great book. Can't wait to read the next book. Hope it is as good ad the first book.
Published 3 months ago by Brenda Cox
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More About the Author

Courtney Cole is a New York Times and USA Today Bestselling novelist who would rather write than eat chocolate. She holds a Bachelor's degree in Business, but no amount of working in the corporate world could quell her urge to write.

Courtney was born and raised in Kansas, home of incredibly friendly people and the most horrendous weather on the planet. Because summer days were so hot, she grew up reading stacks of books... and when she didn't like the ending, she wrote her own.

Courtney loves hot pink nail polish, Mitch Albom and thunderstorms (not necessarily in that order).

She currently lives near Chicago with her real life Prince Charming, two sons, one daughter and small domestic zoo. To learn more about her, visit wwww.courtneycoleauthor.com

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