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I'm Still Your Mother: How To Get Along With Your Grown-Up Children For The Rest Of Your Life Paperback – June 21, 2001


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I'm Still Your Mother: How To Get Along With Your Grown-Up Children For The Rest Of Your Life + When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us: Letting Go of Their Problems, Loving Them Anyway, and Getting on with Our Lives
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 240 pages
  • Publisher: iUniverse (June 21, 2001)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0595183581
  • ISBN-13: 978-0595183586
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.6 x 8.5 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (24 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #81,619 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

You can strengthen your family bonds without getting tangled in them. Jane Adams tells you how to handle the ongoing challenges of postparenthood in this witty, commonsense guide to creating a healthy relationship with your grown children, whether you're an empty-nester or a "boomerang parent" with children and grandchildren living with you. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Review

Pragmatic, dead honest, compassionate. -- Dr. Pepper Schwartz, coauthor of American Couples: Money-Work-Sex --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

More About the Author

Smith College, B.A. Doctorate in social psychology. Author of 12 books, fiction and nonfiction, over 200 magazine and newspaper articles, columns and essays.Frequent media commentator,speaker, coach/consultant in parenting adult children and family business. www.janeadams.com

Customer Reviews

Great advice you can follow plus validates all you are feeling.
new mom in law
It takes time and sometimes hurt feelings to find the new boundaries and to know that they still love you and want to be close - just differently.
Michele C. Nealon
I would highly recommend this book to any woman who is having a difficult time in her relationship with her daughter or her mother!!
PEAPIE

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

72 of 73 people found the following review helpful By Michele C. Nealon on February 10, 2007
Format: Paperback
I thought I was the only one who felt like I could never say the right thing to my adult children. We were so close when they were at home and always understood that whatever I said, I wanted only the best for them. Once they were married and had homes and kids of their own, I felt a sense of loss along with the joy. Sometimes when I spoke to them the same way I thought I always had, I was met with a look or a comment that let me know I was overstepping my bounds. It takes time and sometimes hurt feelings to find the new boundaries and to know that they still love you and want to be close - just differently. I'm learning that on my own but this book made me feel much better knowing my situation isn't unusual. I highly recommend it!
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67 of 75 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on December 2, 2001
Format: Paperback
If you have children who are about to leave home...or if they're already gone, you need to read this book. In a humorous and easy to read style, Jane Adams will guide you through the difficulties of dealing with adult children. She will also offer ways for you to be less of a parent and more of a friend. One of the true gifts of this book is the advice she gives that you should allow your children to have their own version of their childhood without them having to defend it. This relieves so much tension between parents and their children! This book is a great platform from which your future parent/child relationship can grow.
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25 of 26 people found the following review helpful By contrary_weasel on December 12, 2006
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
My 22 y/o son says: "Momma, you always read the funniest books." But, hey... this is uncharted territory I'm in, here. A Mom's Gotta Do What A Mom's Gotta Do. :)

And for the record, we get along FINE. I just wanted to know how to best support my kids as they leave the nest and stop thinking the world revolves around me (heh), continuing on their journey to adulthood.

This book answered a lot of my questions and reassured me about a lot of the bumps in the road, my feelings, etc. It's supportive without being preachy, covers a wide range of potential situations, and yet is short enough to be an easy read.

Highly recommended.
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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful By G. Houston on May 12, 2007
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This book is an excellent reference for those of us whose children have grown into adults and have their own families. The playing field is completely different from when they were children, and this book helps guide you on that journey to a good relationship with your kids and their spouses.
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11 of 11 people found the following review helpful By Debi Bentley on November 29, 2008
Format: Paperback
The book was really helpful! I have 5 grown sons and have had trouble "cutting the strings" , was jealous a bit with the daughter in laws and worried over the kids money and problems and seeing the grandbabies.
Jane really hits you on the head with some of her ideas, and lets you realise WOW MY JOB IS OVER!!
Still a struggle but much better.......it can help anyone with any kind of grown child!!
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17 of 19 people found the following review helpful By The Baby of the Family on June 4, 2008
Format: Paperback
Attention all mothers who have sacrificed everything for your children. Have you lived your entire life for those little beings that you gave birth to so many years ago? This book is a wake-up call!! Your job as that over-protective, hovering mother is OVER! You must learn to redefine yourself as the mother of an adult child, who neither needs, nor wants hovering or unsolicited advice. This book is an "A-ha!" and although my children have a few years to get to adulthood, I am so glad I read it now. I am sending it to my mother with prayers that she will (after being duly offended, of course) read it, and gain some insight into parenting adult children. I highly recommend this book if you are having constant struggles with your adult child, and don't understand why there is always anger between you. (Of course, if you are the type who is searching Amazon for books to read on parent/adult-child relationships, you may have already reached this level of enlightenment!)
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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful By Patricia M. Conway on July 5, 2008
Format: Paperback
I have two adult children, one adult in-law child, and one ex-son-in-law. This book saved me a lot of heartache along this journey. I refer to it over and over.
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9 of 9 people found the following review helpful By PEAPIE on June 13, 2008
Format: Paperback
This is an excellent book for both the mother and the daughter to read. Ms. Adam is an excellent writer. The humor she mixes in makes the information easier to digest as it hits close to the heart. I would highly recommend this book to any woman who is having a difficult time in her relationship with her daughter or her mother!!
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