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Integrity: The Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality [Hardcover]

Henry Cloud
4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (67 customer reviews)

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Book Description

February 7, 2006

Integrity. It is more than simple honesty. It's the key to success. A person with integrity has the -- often rare -- ability to pull everything together, to make it all happen no matter how challenging the circumstances.

Drawing on experiences from his work with Fortune 500 companies, nonprofits, and individual leaders, Dr. Henry Cloud, a clinical psychologist and nationally syndicated radio host, shows how our character can keep us from achieving all we want to (or could) be.

In Integrity, Dr. Cloud explores the six qualities of character that define integrity. He uses stories from well-known business leaders like Michael Dell and sports figures like Tiger Woods to illustrate each of these qualities. He shows us how people with integrity:

  • Are able to connect with others and build trust
  • Are oriented toward reality
  • Finish well
  • Embrace the negative
  • Are oriented toward increase
  • Have an understanding of the transcendent

Success is not related to only talent or brains. There are a lot of bright, talented people who are never successful. And the most successful are not only the ones with the most talent. The real factor, Cloud demonstrates, is the makeup of the person. All of us can grow in the kinds of real character that bring about fruitful relationships and achievement of purpose, mission, and goals. Integrity is not something that you either have or don't, but instead is an exciting growth path that all of us can engage in and enjoy.


Frequently Bought Together

Integrity: The Courage to Meet the Demands of Reality + Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward + Safe People: How to Find Relationships That Are Good for You and Avoid Those That Aren't
Price for all three: $45.07

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

For Cloud, an author, clinical psychologist and corporate consultant, integrity is more than just a person's ethics and morals. The French and Latin meanings of the word hint at its origins, "that the whole thing is working well, undivided, integrated, intact and uncorrupted." Achieving this "wholeness" requires the development of six character traits (creates trust, unafraid of reality, results-oriented, solves "negative realities," causes growth and finds meaning in life) which Cloud examines in great detail, using business stories like Proctor and Gamble's success in China and the experiences of his CEO friends and clients. What each of his stories has in common is how success, often wild success across multiple fields, is fueled by openness, honesty to one's self and to others and "true trust," which is borne out of someone's goodness not being "dependent on anything." Cloud's conversational writing style makes for an easy read, and much of his advice is sound if not groundbreaking, but some aphorisms come off as hokey. ("Things never work. When they don't, that is the time to make them work. Then, if you do, they work," or "Character = the ability to meet the demands of reality," which is not to be confused with integrity, the courage to meet those same demands.) This book is not for the person seeking a quick-fix; Cloud's breed of integrity is a lifestyle choice.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

“[Integrity] lays out a transparent way to be a terrific leader by drawing on and improving your best traits.” (New York Times )

“Let Henry Cloud teach you how to live an authentic life. This is a must-read!” (Ken Blanchard, Co-Author, The One-Minute Manager )

“Dr. Henry Cloud is an expert in helping leaders see hos their character development is essential to their effectiveness.” (Denis Beausejour, Consultant and former Global Vice President of Marketing, The Procter & Gamble Company )

“Dr. Cloud will show you how to produce the results you are looking for in your work and personal life.” (Dr. Phil McGraw, #1 New York Times bestselling author and host of the Dr. Phil show )

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 292 pages
  • Publisher: HarperBusiness; 1 edition (February 7, 2006)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0060849681
  • ISBN-13: 978-0060849689
  • Product Dimensions: 6 x 1 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.3 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (67 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #71,339 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Dr. Cloud is a leadership consultant, best-selling author, and speaker whose books have sold well over 5 million copies. He consults and speaks for companies and organizations in the area of leadership and performance, and is highly regarded for his ability to connect personal and interpersonal development with the needs of business.
He is a clinical psychologist and leadership consultant with a unique ability to connect with audiences. Drawing upon his broad range of experiences in private practice, leadership consulting, and media, he simplifies life's issues and gives easy to understand, practical advice. It's Dr. Cloud's humor, compassion and "in the moment" confrontation that make his approach to psychology, business and spirituality such a success.
Dr. Cloud has written, or co-written, more than twenty books, including the two-million-seller Boundaries and his most recent books, Necessary Endings, Integrity, The One Life Solution, The Law of Happiness and 9 Things You Simply Must Do. His books have sold over five million copies. His works have been reviewed and featured by such publications as The New York Times, The Wall St. Journal, The Boston Globe, The Los Angeles Times and many others. Dr. Cloud co-hosts the nationally syndicated radio program New Life Live, which is heard in over 180 markets.
As a speaker, he is a favorite at corporate events, conventions, and public arena events on a variety of topics, speaking regularly through the U.S. and internationally.
In his consulting practice, he works with leaders in a wide range of organizations and corporations, from family help firms to Fortune 25 and Fortune 500 companies. He has an extensive executive coaching background and experience as an organizational and leadership consultant, spending the majority of his hands-on time with CEOs and executive teams.
Dr. Cloud founded and built a health care company which operated treatment centers in forty markets in the Western U.S. for which he served as Clinical Director for ten years. In that context of hands-on clinical experience, he developed and researched many of the treatment principles and methods that he communicates to audiences now. After selling the company, he devoted his time to consulting and coaching, spreading principles of hope and life-change through speaking, writing and media.
He is a graduate of Southern Methodist University, earning a B.S. in psychology with honors. He completed his Ph.D. in clinical psychology at Biola University, and his clinical internship at Los Angeles County Department of Mental Health. His philanthropic interests lie in the area of homelessness and the inner city, as well as missions in the developing world. He lives in Los Angeles with his wife, Tori, and their two daughters, Olivia and Lucy.

Customer Reviews

Integrity is a fun, easy book to read as well as a sobering, difficult book to read. G. A. Marken  |  18 reviewers made a similar statement
This book sheds light on what it means to be a person of integrity. BigMike  |  10 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
60 of 63 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover
The Collins imprint of HarperCollins Publishers continues to pour out a very impressive stream of books that address ethical issues in business. Dr. Henry Cloud's book, "Integrity," published just a few weeks ago, is the latest offering in this genre. I found it to be a very encouraging, challenging and ultimately uplifting work. Henry Cloud, despite his background as a psychologist, manages to avoid the "psychobabble" one often encounters in reading clinicians who opine on business ethics. He anchors his thoughts in the real world of clients he has consulted with in helping them to address very real and concrete business issues that have deep roots in issues of ethics and integrity.

Dr. Cloud makes it clear that "integrity," as he uses the term, is much more than mere "honesty." Throughout the book he parses and elucidates six essential qualities and character traits that lead to success in the business world. He describes the kind of character that . . .

1) Creates and maintains trust

2) Is able to see and face reality

3) Works in a way that brings results

4) Embraces negative realities and solves them

5) Causes growth and increase

6) Achieves transcendence and meaning in life

"You will see how these character traits supercede gifts, talents and ability, and how the ones who have them succeed and the ones who don't, ultimately fail." (Page xii)

In this review, I will offer more quotations than I typically do in writing about a book. The reasons for this proliferation of quotes are that I want to share a fair sample of Dr. Cloud's nuggets, and he states the case very well in his own words. I could not improve upon them through more extensive commentary.

In talking with a wealthy businessman who is a personal friend, Dr. Cloud heard his friend comment on how he chooses to invest his money in businesses.

"I did not invest in those businesses. I invested in the people. I never invest in businesses I don't know anything about, but I will invest in a person. If I know their character, their history, how they operate, what kind of judgment they have, what kinds of risks are acceptable to them, how they execute, and things like that, and I know them well, I will invest. But I don't buy businesses I don't know anything about." (Pages 29-30)

Early in this book, Dr. Cloud gives us his expanded definition of integrity as it applies to the business world:

"And, the origins of the word we can see in the French and Latin meanings of intact, integrate, integral and entirety. The concept means that the `whole thing is working well, undivided, integrated, intact and uncorrupted.' When we are talking about integrity, we are talking about being a whole person, an integrated person, with all of our different parts working well and delivering the functions that they were designed to deliver. It is about wholeness and effectiveness as people. It truly is `running on all cylinders.'" (Page 31)

The author offers a very clear and helpful metaphor for the type of impact that this kind of person of integrity has on the lives of those with whom she or he interacts. Dr. Cloud posits that each of us, as we move through the waters of life, leave behind a wake, like that left by ships as they pass through the ocean. There are two aspects to the "wake" that we leave behind - the tasks we have performed and the relationships we have built.

"We leave a wake of people behind us as we move though their lives and their organizations. . . So, we must ask ourselves, `What does that wake look like?' Are a lot of people out there water-skiing on the wake, smiling, having a great time for our having `moved through their lives'? Or are they are there bobbing for air, bleeding, and left wounded as shark bait?" (Page 18)

In the chapter on Building Trust Through Connections, Cloud offers this profound insight that helps us to understand the difference between those persons and companies that command loyalty and those that do not:

"The human heart will seek to be known, understood, and connected with above all else. If you do not connect, the ones you care about will find someone who will." (Page 70)

Applying this principle alone in most companies today would dramatically reduce the costs of employee theft, turnover, recruiting, retention and succession planning.

In the chapter on Trust Through Vulnerability, Cloud talks about an early childhood experience he had with his mother that caused him to trust her more deeply than he might otherwise have been able to do.

"I needed a model that was strong enough to depend on, but vulnerable enough to identify with. That combination is what made it work. In essence, it said, `Hey, she is like me, in that she is afraid sometimes and feels like she can't do it. But, she does it anyway. She pushes forward.'

Her vulnerability is what made her power available to me." (Page 92)

In sharing What People In Touch Look Like, Dr. Cloud recounts an incident that happened on a retreat for CEO's, when a young "superstar" was given an opportunity to receive feedback from a more senior CEO.

"One of the more experienced guys looked up and said, `Want some feedback?' He said it in a way that left you wondering whether he was going to give sage advice or rail at the young man for being out to lunch in some way. There was just no way to tell from his poker face. But I will never forget the young superstar's immediate response: `By all means. Give me a gift.' He saw the feedback, whatever it was, as a gift because it could give him some reality that he did not know. I remember thinking, `We will be watching this guy's accomplishments for a long time.'" (Page 116)

Cloud then ratchets up the significance of this insight by suggesting a challenging way for us to put this principle of inviting feedback to a practical test:

"If you want to know your comfort level in this matter, think of going to the people you work with or are in close personal relationships with and give them 100 percent permission to be totally honest with you in answering the question: `What is it like to be on the other end of me?'" (Pages 116-117)

I must draw to a close this review, lest I run the risk of conveying Cloud's whole book to you via this Blog! I want to encourage you to buy the book as an investment in yourself and in your growth and success. But, in closing, I will share a final excerpt that captures the essence of what this book is all about:

"I just returned from an international leadership summit in which the leaders discussed their personal orientations toward growth. One global leader said that about ten years ago, he was near burnout and collapse, as his organization had exploded in size. But, he himself was dying. So, with input from his board, he made a huge investment of both time and money. He decided that every summer he would take six weeks away to study, refresh, get input into his soul, and re-create. He put the number two person in charge with orders not to call him `unless the whole thing were burning down.'" (Pages 222-223)

Dr. Cloud chose to protect the anonymity of this global leader. I do not know if he was referring to Pastor Bill Hybels of WillowCreek Church, but I have heard with my own ears Pastor Hybels share a similar story of taking intentional steps to prevent burnout by making the difficult decision to get away from daily pressures in order to carve out some time to recharge the batteries and to reinvigorate the soul. That is the very heart of integrity.

Most business leaders I know will find something of value in this book that they can internalize and begin to apply immediately - for their own benefit and for the benefit of all those who are "surfing their wake."

Enjoy.

Al Chase
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13 of 14 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A must read! March 30, 2006
Format:Hardcover
I was pleasantly surprised that this book was so much different and more insightful than the other books I have read that deal with the subject matter of "integrity." Here, the focus of meaning of integrity is not so much on morals and ethics, although that is covered here, but it instead focuses on deeper aspects of character. The basic assumption here is that "integration" or "wholeness" of character is a necessary component in order to reach one's maximum potential both personally and professionally, and that character is not fixed or unchangeable. This book is extremely inspirational and informative. It is a roadmap to success and happiness. Highly recommended!
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24 of 29 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Integrity Has Integrity March 13, 2006
Format:Hardcover
After skimming and then reading Integrity, our most difficult task was to classify the book so that we could explain it. We'll try.

Dr. Cloud has written an excellent, "Yeah But" book. Integrity is a fun, easy book to read as well as a sobering, difficult book to read. It isn't a business roadmap book. Instead it is more of a lifestyle enhancement guide that can help you achieve personal satisfaction different from great financial wealth -- and professional satisfaction/success.

When we first skimmed the book we said "yeah but" quite a bit because we couldn't fault Dr. Cloud's key points and discussion. You have a tendency to read and agree with the six essential qualities for success that he outlines and explains then experience or rationalization steps in and says..."yeah but if we had done that awhile back when were in this situation, we would have been nailed!"

That's why we strongly encourage you to read Integrity in a different way than you might most books if you really want to get the author's message (and we believe he has a message for everyone in the industry!).

Skim the book, put it down and leave it alone for a week or two. Then pick it up and read really read the book with the idea that you're going to understand the key reality issues and can use them to enhance every aspect of your life.

Integrity really is a must-read!!!!

A clinical psychologist, Cloud has identified a set of key character traits ability to transcend, ability to focus on growth, ability to understand and deal with negatives, ability to focusing on results and finishing tasks, connecting in an authentic manner and orientation toward truth. The book helps you come to grips with adversity, learn from it and reshape/relearn behavioral patterns that will help you succeed.

Using real examples from business leaders across the spectrum P&G, Dell Computer, Toshiba, 7-Eleven and other organizations he makes it easy for you to understand how successful people enhance their competencies, build business and personal alliances and enrich their own character.

The ability to transcend according to Cloud means being able to lead programs and projects with a greater truth because people like to be around individuals who are committed to the greater mission and in making the project/program succeed.

Concerning the demands of reality, he notes that we have to constantly grow and increase our abilities, skills and capacities as a total person; not just on the job. We particularly liked his examination of what happens when individuals or their surroundings suppress the natural desire to grow by not taking calculated risks. Mistakes and "failures" can help you enhance your integrity.

Problems occur and "stuff" happens but Cloud points out that if people are able to address the negatives and work through them to a positive solution then they can regroup and recover. Often achieving even more than they had anticipated.

Successful people seem to have a unique ability to make the tough decisions that allow they to realize their goals. Granted they don't always win but they know how to lose gracefully and learn from the shortcoming. If you ask 100 people if they work hard the majority will claim they do but Cloud asserts that they don't achieve lofty goals. They don't achieve what he calls real results because they don't make the hard choices and if they achieve a partial win they are satisfied and don't push for the ultimate goal.

Cloud focuses heavily on truth which in his opinion allows people to find and work in reality. He emphasizes that people who are constantly expanding their integrity actively pursue reality, grab it and make it work for them.

We found his explanation of successful people who had integrity were also authentic or real. We can all identify people who are nice because they understand and empathize with people's needs. Adding to that he notes that leaders and successful people are simultaneously seem strong and vulnerable as well as trusting and committed. He emphasizes that people who can connect with you in a way that makes you understand that they value these key component increases their integrity in your mind and enables/encourages you to help them achieve goals.

Cloud has spelled out the traits that anyone can develop if they work at it hard enough so that they become second nature and as natural as breathing. Then you can look in the mirror and state emphatically that you have integrity. More importantly, it will encourage those around you to deal with their personal and business encounters with integrity.

If we were to fault Cloud's work in any way it would be that the underlying premise of the book is that people who have integrity and face up to reality achieve financially. But maybe that's the motivation you're going to need deal with integrity and reality in your personal and professional life.

Whatever your goals, Integrity should be skimmed, read and reread until the six characteristics are natural to you.

#######
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
2.0 out of 5 stars This is a horribly written book
I can't believe the reviews rating this book so high. It was probably the worst written book I have read in years. There is no organization to the thoughts. Read more
Published 1 month ago by Gerald
5.0 out of 5 stars Integrity is Solid
This book sheds light on what it means to be a person of integrity. Beyond having strong character and being trustworthy, also being "for" and "not against" others... Read more
Published 1 month ago by BigMike
5.0 out of 5 stars Insightful
Eye opening. Wish I had read this year's ago. Incredible and practical insight. A bit painful to read as I discovered my deficiencies.
Published 1 month ago by Vanessa Shipowick
5.0 out of 5 stars This should be recommended reading more often.
Book was listed on the Chief's recommended reading list. This book appealed to me more than others by far . Read more
Published 2 months ago by John H.
5.0 out of 5 stars Dr Cloud is great
Good stuff - Dr. Cloud does a good job with the material - worth the investment and the time to read
Published 2 months ago by james
1.0 out of 5 stars Disgusted!
I am a HUGE Cloud and Townsend fan. I have read nearly everything they've put out over the last 15 years. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Unojo
5.0 out of 5 stars Read it.
I love this book. I have not stopped quoting it this month since I started reading it. I have also halted the other 8 books I am reading to finish this.. it is brilliant!
Published 3 months ago by Christina Richardson
5.0 out of 5 stars FANTASTIC!
The book is well written answering many of my questions about how integrity affects my life and the lives of others
Published 4 months ago by NTK
5.0 out of 5 stars Easy read on a tough topic
This book is filled with insights and help about how to create integrity in our lives, especially as it pertains to our work.
Well written and informative.
Published 4 months ago by Betsy H. Greenman
5.0 out of 5 stars Exceptional Service
Had this in less than 48 hours. Kudos. The book is a must read for people who seem to make excuses about living in integrity .
Published 4 months ago by Delores Williams
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