111 of 111 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Introverts are not alone, February 15, 2009
Oh my, where has this book been all of my life?!! As a marked introvert who has to pretend to be an extrovert in my health-care career at a busy county hospital, this book was like water poured over my soul. It is okay to need alone times to recharge. Introverts are up to 57% of the American population, according to some sources, and if you an introvert, there is nothing wrong with you. I burst out laughing at the quote on p. 16, "If you've been spending a lot of time with people, she might suggest that you are avoiding time alone and suggest that you might be depressed." I could relate so well! In our society, everyone thinks there is something wrong with you, if you like quiet time, not if you're avoiding quiet time. I adore books, and if I get a day off work, I'm happiest at our nearby bookstore curled up with a stack of good books to peruse and a cup of hot chocolate from their cafe -- this is also a recommended introvert pursuit, according to the book, but one that few people understand (I assume that many readers of Amazon reviews also enjoy books, however, so I'm assuming readers of this blog will understand a love of books). I'm also half Swedish/Norwegian, and the author describes Sweden as being one of the openly introverted cultures in the world, along with Japan, where introversion is also prized and understood. I enjoyed how the author is familiar with the Myers-Briggs test; as an INFP myself, I also recommend the book "Please Understand Me II." It is not likely that I can restructure my people-centered career at the hospital, but I've learned to escape on lunch break to my car and sit quietly for a while with a book or my thoughts. It is worth it even in winter when it is so cold, just to not have people constantly demanding my attention, and just let my spirit breathe. I go back in to work and I'm revitalized and smiling and have so much more to give. (See Ch. 13, "Why Did I Want to Work with People?") After reading this book, I actually understand why I repeatedly fantasize about escaping up north to a little cabin filled with books for a whole winter, or a remote island with no one else around, this is not strange for an introvert. People drain introverts, even if we enjoy them -- in small doses, with space in between, to quote the book.
The book also discusses how introverts can claim private space, carve out time to think, bring a slower tempo to daily life, create breaks in conversation and relationships, and deal effectively with parties and crowds. Most of all, it gives you permission to enjoy quiet time and if you are introverted, to learn how to thrive instead of just co-exist with all of the noise of modern life.
Contents:
Part I: Antisocial, Weird, or Displaced?
Ch. 1 The Mistaken Identity
Ch. 2 Alone is Not a Four-letter Word
Ch. 3 Becoming an Alien
Ch. 4 "Anyone Else IN?"
Ch. 5 Meditating with the Majority: The Introverted Society
Part II: The Introvert's Wish List
Ch. 6 A Room of your own
Ch. 7 The Time to Think
Ch. 8 The Right to Retreat
Ch. 9 The Freedom of a Flaneur
Ch. 10 Inroads to Intimacy
Part III: Standing Still in a Loud World
Ch. 11: The Conversation Conundrum
Ch. 12 The Anti-Party Guide
Ch. 13 Why Did I Want to Work with People?
Ch. 14 The Downside to Self-Containment
Ch. 15 Showing Up for Relationships
Part IV: Outing the Introvert
Ch. 16 From Apology to Acceptance -- and Beyond
Ch. 17 Celebrating Introversion
Ch. 18 Expressing What's In There
Ch. 19 Moshing on Your Own Terms
Ch. 20 Introvert Power
I highly recommend this book for all introverts, and people who know introverts.
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52 of 55 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Fascinating book, July 10, 2008
Wow! What a fascinating book. The title caught my attention, and once I got into it, I was pleased with all of the insights the author provides. I always figured I was an introvert, but I didn't realize what that meant until I read this book. Now I understand that introverts simply gain strength from within and that many social interactions cause them to expend energy, while extroverts gain strength from interactions and have to expend more energy through internal reflection. That explains a lot of mysteries about people I have known, including me. The author does a great job of disproving the falsehood that introverts are in the minority and that extroversion is the preferred state of being. Neither is better than the other, but knowing the difference can help all of us understand ourselves and others better. I also like the way the author combines academic research, real-life examples and her own experiences to make a very compelling case for the power of introverts. I plan to keep this book in a handy spot so I can refer to it whenever I need a refresher on its concepts. This book is a good investment.
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46 of 49 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Provoking, in every sense possible-, July 10, 2008
I feel that had I known, or my parents and the adults around me, all this information, these helpful insights, I would have saved myself a lot of trouble. Trouble, in every sense of the word. It's bittersweet. I feel justified, vindicated, explained, comprehended, normal. But at the same time, it's almost haunting.
"If they had know this or that...things wouldnt have happened that way." This book has thusfar explained every struggle I've ever had, and the truth is I'm not exaggerating.
Aside from being wonderfully written, in an accessible and personal tone, the book leaves nothing unanswered, and no room for doubiousness. It's a great investment for people who are introverted, or people who know introverts, or extroverts who can understand introverts....the list goes on.
A+
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