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It's a Boy: Women Writers on Raising Sons [Paperback]

Andrea J. Buchanan
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (26 customer reviews)

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Book Description

November 11, 2005
The most popular question any pregnant woman is asked — aside from "When are you due?" — has got to be "Are you having a girl or a boy?" When author Andrea Buchanan, already a mom to a little girl, was pregnant with her second child, she marveled at the response of friends and total strangers alike: "Boys are wonderful," "Boys are so much better than girls," "Boys love their mothers differently than girls." This constant refrain led her to explore the issue herself, with help from her fellow writers and moms, many of whom had had the same experience.

The result is It's A Boy, a wide-ranging, often-humorous, and honest collection of essays about the experience of mothering boys. Taking on topics like aggression, parenting a teenage boy, and wishing for a daughter but getting a son, It's A Boy explores what it's like to mother sons and how that experience may be different, but no less satisfying, than mothering girls.

Frequently Bought Together

It's a Boy: Women Writers on Raising Sons + Between Mothers and Sons: Women Writers Talk About Having Sons and Raising Men + Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys
Price for all three: $34.53

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Seal Press (November 11, 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1580051456
  • ISBN-13: 978-1580051453
  • Product Dimensions: 5.4 x 0.8 x 7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (26 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #257,489 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Andrea J. Buchanan is a New York Times bestselling author whose latest book is the multimedia young adult novel GIFT, published by Open Road Integrated Media. Her other work includes the internationally bestselling The Daring Book For Girls and seven other books. Before becoming a writer, Andi trained as a pianist, earning a bachelor of music degree in piano performance from the Boston Conservatory of Music and a master's from the San Francisco Conservatory. Her last recital was at Carnegie Hall's Weill Recital Hall. She lives with her family in Philadelphia.

Customer Reviews

This book really helped with that. Emily Grossi  |  4 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
31 of 35 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Not a clunker in the bunch January 11, 2006
Format:Paperback
Thirty essays by writers who are the mothers of sons comprise this collection edited by Andrea J. Buchanan. (Buchanan, herself the mother of a boy and girl, contributed the eponymous essay "It's a Boy!") The essays are divided among four sections, which, briefly put, explore topics related to "prenatal boy apprehension," the "otherness" of boys, gender expectations, and the transition of boys to manhood. Some of the essays are humorous, some poignant, some thoughtful, and readers will undoubtedly have their own favorites. But there really isn't a clunker in the bunch.

Among the more affecting essays in the collection are Susan Ito's "Samuel," about the baby boy she was forced to abort only two weeks before he would have been viable, and Susan O'Doherty's "The Velvet Underground," in which the author chronicles the lesser heartbreak of her son's emotional scarring at the hands of his insensitive playmates. Jacquelyn Mitchard's reflections on her son's transition to manhood ("The Day He Was Taller") are unexpectedly poignant, while Jennifer Lauck's "It Takes a Village" was simply chilling--in fact unputdownable.

Catherine Newman touches on the subjects of gender expectations and homosexuality in her sweet, amusing essay "Pretty Baby." She writes about the various reactions people have to seeing her son wearing his favorite color, bright pink:[...]

Boys are famous for having penises, of course, and they come in two basic styles. In her amusing essay "Making the Cut" Jamie Pearson recounts the arguments she and her husband had over the circumcision question prior to her son's birth: [...]

Among the more thought provoking essays--because you probably never thought about the issue it raises before--is Katie Kaput's "Things You Can't Teach.
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13 of 16 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
I really enjoyed this collection of essays on raising sons. I have three of them myself and was very excited to get my hands on this book that tells the tales of mothers and their challenges and joys when raising their sons from conception to the dreaded teenage years. There were obviously some essays that I enjoyed more than others such as Susan Ito's "Samuel" about a woman and the son she never had. "Things You Can't Teach" by Katie Kaput a transgender woman trying to raise a son, "Pretty Baby" by Catherine Newman a hilarious essay about a woman trying to raise a son without the confines of societal norms and Jacquelyn Mitchard's "The Day He Was Taller" a touching essay about the day she realized her son was becoming a man. All of these above mentioned essays made me laugh or cry and I thoroughly enjoyed them all.

So one may wonder if I liked all of these essays so much why am I only giving the book three stars. Well that is because many of the essays despite being fairly entertaining did not touch me...I could not relate. The beginning essays mostly focused on women's disappointment at learning they were having a boy. Now, trust me when I tell you no one has wanted a little girl more than I did and when I found out I was having twin boys after already having a three year old son I was a bit miffed to say the least. However, no matter how much I wanted a girl I never cried over the fact that I was having boys, my disappointment did not run as deep as many of these women's seemed to have at the news of a boy. I was just happy to be having healthy babies. So on this issue while I could totally understand, I couldn't completely relate.

Also, many of these women writers wanted to raise their sons to be free of the confines society forces on boys.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Really Interesting and thoughtful December 30, 2005
By Sajmom
Format:Paperback
I was hoping this wouldn't be a book that conveyed the message that boys are more fun to raise than girls. And it wasn't-it was thoughtful and entertaining. Many different viewpoints on the experience of raising a boy. It celebrates the experience without putting down it's opposite. I really enjoyed this book. It covered issues I had wondered about and ones that hadn't occurred to me. It's great to hear thinking women exploring this topic. I have a girl and two boys, I'm really looking forward to the sequel.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Great, even for people who don't have boys December 1, 2005
Format:Paperback
I have two daughters, and It's a Boy comes as close as anything to be the son I'll never have. I can't begin to say how much I loved this book. The writing is varied and delightful, from the big names in the book to the people who've yet to be discovered by the masses. But even better is the insight each essay in the collection brings. It showed me that sons are every bit as dynamic, fragile, strong and loving as daughters. I plan to share this with all the mothers I know, and can't wait to read It's a Girl when it comes out in 2006.
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9 of 11 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars LOVE IT! November 11, 2005
By B. Long
Format:Paperback
When I saw the cover of this book, I had a feeling I would love it. The picture of the little boy on the cover flexing his muscles is something I have seen my three sons do many, many times. When I opened it and started to read, wonderful memories flooded back of when my sons were younger. I laughed and cried almost simultaneously while reading several of the stories.

If you have sons, or have friends that have sons, this book is a must. I will be buying my friends who are mothers of sons this for Christmas.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Read
A wonderful collection that showcases what it means to raise and love a son, especially from a feminist perspective. Read more
Published on May 13, 2011 by M.C. Gibbons
1.0 out of 5 stars For the Ultra-Modern Mom who wanted a Girl...
Really disappointing collection of essays by mostly ultra-modern feminist types. No offense if you're one - I admit they are so hip and cool and PC that I used to sometimes think I... Read more
Published on January 11, 2011 by Kerri
5.0 out of 5 stars Really hit home
As a mother who was shocked, (though not at all disappointed), upon learning my second baby was a boy, I really could relate to a lot of the mothers in this anthology. Read more
Published on April 5, 2010 by A. Levitas
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Essays
I found this book to be heartwarming yet hilarious and I felt like I had a big sister giving me advice while I read. Read more
Published on July 12, 2009 by Beth E. Wankel
1.0 out of 5 stars Boring, Negative Book
I found this book to have a very negative and complaining tone to it. It was not what I expected. Rather than celebrate having a son it seemed to find writers that wanted a girl... Read more
Published on August 24, 2008 by Margaret
5.0 out of 5 stars Great memories
This book brought back a lot of great memories of raising my 2 sons (who liked to fight a lot when they were younger) and I'm glad they're grown up now.
Published on August 9, 2008 by Edith
2.0 out of 5 stars Disappointing.
I found this book, along with it's sister title, to be tirelessly repetitive and over simplified. Most of these women (the great majority of whom are upper middle class New... Read more
Published on August 4, 2008 by J. Hertz
5.0 out of 5 stars I like it!
The stories are written by mothers of different ethnicities and socio-economic backgrounds. It's strange to realize that mothers all over the country feel the same way about... Read more
Published on June 1, 2008 by AngieAndAidan
3.0 out of 5 stars Overall great essays, but some that are very hard to read
Overall, the stories are touching and are exactly what I was hoping for when I ordered this book. However, for those of you are sensitive, be careful - there are some hard essays... Read more
Published on May 14, 2008 by 1st time mother to be
5.0 out of 5 stars Sentimental and Real
Great Book. A must-have. Many of the essays made me cry, which is OK because I had it in my car where I would read it in a parking lot after my son would fall asleep in the car. Read more
Published on November 6, 2007 by Samsmom
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