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It's (Not That) Complicated: How to Relate to Guys in a Healthy, Sane, and Biblical Way Paperback – 2011

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 259 pages
  • Publisher: Western Conservatory; 1ST edition (2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1935877127
  • ISBN-13: 978-1935877127
  • Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6 x 0.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (19 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #76,127 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

4.9 out of 5 stars
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Guys, you need to read this book.
Kyle Shepherd
God will rightly judge and discipline men for their own sins, but He will also rightly judge and discipline girls who encourage a man's sin.
Dr K P Gerstenberg
Using it book study with my daughter, 2 friends, and their moms- love it!

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

37 of 38 people found the following review helpful By Kyle Shepherd on March 3, 2012
Format: Paperback
In this book, Anna Sofia and Elizabeth, the daughters of Geoff and Victoria Botkin, tackle the oft-perceived-as-complicated subject of friendships with boys.

But stop--I'm a guy. That negates everything in this book and so we don't have to read it, right? Nothing could be farther from the truth. In fact, my greatest fear regarding this book is that it will not be read by very many young men--simply because the book is written by two girls, for girls, and has a girl on the front of the book wearing pink.

As a matter of fact, so much in this book is applicable to us guys. Sure, there are things we don't need to work on (like being feminine, or learning how to submit to a husband, or other female-specific aspects), but--Lord willing--you will have daughters one day!--So maybe you should pay attention to those parts too. However, there many, many pieces of (biblical) wisdom in this book on how to treat the opposite gender that are just not female-specific or able to be applied only by young ladies. I cannot over-emphasize enough the importance of the principles contained in this book. Guys, you can glean a phenomenal amount from these pages. In fact, sprinkled throughout the book are little gray boxes containing text written by a guys on whatever point the Botkins are discussing at the moment. These boxes are very insightful--and accurate.

The Botkins wisely deal with many important issues.--How do proper relationships start? What do you do if you have no brothers (or sisters, if you're a guy)? Should I avoid boys (girls) altogether? What do I do if I have a damaged relationship with a brother (sister)? What kind of an influence do I have on my brothers? How important are family relationships, compared to marital relationships? What can we talk to with guys (girls)?
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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful By Dr K P Gerstenberg on May 17, 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Recommended for: at least 10, but probably older thru when you get married. Don't let your little girl read it unless she struggles with male relationships, or has a tendency to flirt. I read it at 18, and found it very suitable to my needs.
Took me: 2 ½ months to read

The subtitle is "How to relate to guys in a healthy, sane, and biblical way". I bought this book because 1) I trust the authors as much as any human author can be trusted and 2) I hadn't read in so long and wanted something good `n interesting. I really wasn't sure what I'd get out of it, but I was very delighted to find that nearly every page spoke to me. I'd love to read this again sometime. Something that I particularly appreciated was that, throughout the book, there are dozens of comments from young men on what is being said. Seeing their opinion and insight was most helpful.

The girls start out with the premise that `guys are people too'. Girls (ahem, apparently) look to `eligible' young men as potential `knights in shining armor'. But truly, they are our brothers in Christ and need our sisterly (appropriate) love and encouragement. When a girl looks at every young man as marriage material, it's rather hard for both of them to work together to serve Christ - e.g. to keep their eyes on Him.

They move on to why God created humans female and male; how He gave us different gifts and strengths, and why it is so important for us to work together - generally and in a marriage relationship.

Next is the really practical stuff (at least the stuff I loved the most): if you can't love your own flesh-and-blood brothers, who do you think you are to attempt to really love your brothers in Christ? Our relational work needs to start at home, where are hearts are very visible.
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17 of 19 people found the following review helpful By Brittany on January 10, 2012
Format: Paperback
There are many books out there that, in one way or another, address the issue of guy-girl relationships. While some of them have helpful and beneficial information within them, a good portion of them lack a solid, biblical perspective and leave a girl more confused than before. Anna Sofia and Elizabeth have earnestly sought God's Word on this issue standing firmly on what God commands of us. They have not added arbitrary rules of conduct or outward conformity and yet, at the same time, have not relaxed the standards of Christ. This book is not just a good or excellent read, but, a very important book that presents the biblical foundation for changing culture on familial, ecclesiastical, and national levels. It gets to the heart of what all girls are lacking - love... agape love... the kind of love that is patient, kind, not jealous, not self-seeking etc. Without this love, every home, church, and nation will be torn down by the women within them.

While the style is fun, humorous, and perky, the Botkin girls have, at the same time, managed to maintain the significant and convicting message. Many girls will find it very easy to understand, and most likely, get a few good laughs out of it as well. Homeschooled, Christian schooled, and Public schooled girls will benefit greatly from all the hard work that they have put into this book. It might even mark a pivotal paradigm shift in their relationship toward God. Don't be afraid to read it! Get out your debit card and press the "Add to Cart" button:)
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