113 of 115 people found the following review helpful
on January 11, 2011
I've read and reviewed a lot of books that supposedly teach you how to improve your voice. It's the Way You Say It: Becoming Articulate, Well-spoken, and Clear is the best book so far for vocal improvement - especially in conversations.
I've struggled for 10 years to speak clearly, more smoothly, and have people hear me. Yes, I sucked. For nearly every sentence I spoke, the person I spoke to said "What?!" It makes you feel worthless. Not many books have helped.
Books like Change Your Voice : Change Your Life : A Quick, Simple Plan for Finding & Using Your Natural Dynamic Voice are good, though they lack many components of a good voice in conversation. Fleming in her book taught me not only how to develop a stronger, resonant, and attractive voice, but to carry into everyday speech in a way that charms people.
When you follow her advice, you'll develop friends more easily. Fleming discovered that people heard they "needed to be more confident" or "behave more like an adult" from bosses when in fact simple changes in their voice using her techniques produced these outcomes. We unconsciously judge someone by their voice. You'll notice this the next time you talk to someone with a clear voice, good tonality, and is empathetic.
As an exercise, notice how you feel the next time you find someone with these vocal qualities then compare it to someone with a suboptimal voice. We connect so much better to people with good vocals. That's the power of learning the methods in this book.
The later parts of the book contain tips on small talk and body language. The best parts in my opinion are in the first half, making it a must read.
I don't have a Barry White voice that makes women drop their jaw. Voice improvement takes a lot of practice according to Fleming, which is something "so simple" yet something I've never seen covered elsewhere. She gives you a behavioral-change plan needed to build a great voice. People aren't asking me "What?!" every time I open my mouth now and I more easily make friends.
Josh Uebergang aka "Tower of Power"
53 of 56 people found the following review helpful
on March 30, 2011
This book is a must read for communication therapists/consultants and particularly for young speech pathologists looking at career opportunities. Universities who train therapists tend to overlook the people in the world who don't have moderate to severe "speech impediments".
There are many people who have been told that they are difficult to understand, hard to hear, or need to improve their communication skills. Some of them have heard their voices recorded and hate what they hear. They become self-conscious and they limit their opportunities to express themselves.
Carol Fleming has written this book to help this larger population of people who would like to have therapy for their weak, muffled, strained, and ineffective voices and manner of speaking. It's obvious that she's very experienced and has helped many people gain the confidence to speak up (and out).
Many of my clients will benefit from her more simplistic approach. They just want to feel and sound more impacful when they speak. I have put into practice many of her suggestions for myself. As a Speech Pathologist, I certainly should sound more clear, articulate, and committed to clients in every way possible.
38 of 41 people found the following review helpful
on November 16, 2010
Full disclosure. I know Carol Fleming personally, and am vaguely familiar with her work. I've never been a client, but I knew she was in speech therapy.
Her book, however, is a revelation. What she does is so far beyond what you think of as speech therapy as to be a whole 'nother world, She acts like a Minister of Communication, in the religious, not the governmental sense of the word.
In this book she shows you how to present yourself, to show yourself off to best advantage.
Consider how you detail a car, or how you stage a house to best show it off.
She teaches you how to do this with yourself.
I always thought that that if I had something to say, all I had to do was to get the message clear and the technique would take care of itself. And I wasn't particularly critical about my natural, intuitive way of doing that presenting.
Dr. Fleming wants me to move that up a notch.
Her book is concise, direct and to the point, with lots of personal stories from her experience to make a lively reading experience. Tight, spare and engaging, with useful stories and clear instructions. You will also learn how a sentence with eleven consecutive instances of the word "had" can, in a proper context and properly punctuated, make a meaningful sentence. Page 63.
But that's not important, it's just diverting. Part of the funny side of the book.
The book has a more serious purpose, some real depth and the benefit of years of her experience in vocal development and communications training. Not everyone can trek out to San Francisco to engage her services, but everyone can benefit from her coaching in this book.
Even, especially, people who don't know they need her help
In a sense, this book is a conversation with an author who has keen insight into the human condition, and a willingness - eagerness - to share her knowledge. Enthusiasm for the human condition runs through her stories, which are case histories of problems in human communication.
10 of 13 people found the following review helpful
on October 15, 2010
After hearing Carol Fleming speak at the Commonwealth Club, I bought her book immediately. It's written in her personable, encouraging tone, and is filled with practical tips and exercises to help anyone improve their speaking and presentation skills. I've read many books on this subject, but Ms. Fleming's is unique in how deeply it delves into the mechanics of speech, and how confidence-inspiring it is. Also, the stories about her clients are very compelling.
13 of 19 people found the following review helpful
on June 27, 2011
''''EDITOR'S BOOK REVIEW-- Lucille S. Rubin Ph.D.
IT'S THE WAY YOU SAY IT by Carol A.
Fleming, Ph.D. (Publisher: iUniverse, Inc.
There are many books offering advice on
how to speak well, but this one is different.
In six easy read chapters, Dr. Fleming
shares her ideas on how to become
articulate, well-spoken and clear. Her six
chapters include: Assessing Your Voice,
Resolving Specific Problems, Developing a
Dynamic Voice, Becoming Well-Spoken,
Unifying Your Verbal and Nonverbal
Messages and Let's Talk Business! Each
chapter stands on its own so you can start
anywhere in the book and you will learn
something new about voice, speech and
presentation skills. I particularly liked
chapter six on Self Introduction,
Interviewing, Voice Mail, Learning to Chat,
Public Speaking, PowerPoint and the
importance of How You Say It!
In other chapters you'll find she has a
unique approach to stage fright, recognizes
how posture affects the voice, helps you find
voice appeal and offers communication tips.
She includes clear, succinct examples to
prove her points that will enhance your
professional and personal life. The book
reflects the author's warmth and humor and
helps speakers find their individual
speaking style. You'll also enjoy her other
publications: The Sound of Your Voice and
The Serious Business of Small Talk available
through Dr. Fleming's web site,
3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
on September 21, 2012
Some good tips written in a manner that was easy to ready and apply. I would recommend for anyone including those who speak well.
3 of 4 people found the following review helpful
on September 13, 2012
This book will help you become aware of your flaws whilst having a conversation or at public speaking. At the end remember that practice makes perfect.
5 of 7 people found the following review helpful
on September 15, 2012
If you have difficulty speaking in most situations or fear that your voice is not well interpreted by those are you, this book is for you. If you are looking to really improve your skill set, finding yourself not-so-inhibited, then I wouldn't suggest the book at all. Unfortunately for me, it just doesn't have the depth I was searching for.
on November 20, 2013
I thoroughly enjoyed this book. Although the majority of the classification of the types of talkers was not applicable to me, this book really helped me to evaluate my soft skills. It's now what I say verbally but what my body language says in conversations. I never realized that what I spoke and the message that my body language was giving off are two totally different things. When I first started reading things, I tried some of the tips suggested for how to seem more approachable, within the first day 5 complete strangers introduced themselves and initiated conversations. I now use the skills at my job and management loves it. I also love how Carol teaches you to own a room. Excellent Book! ~Chelicia H.
on November 20, 2013
It gives great examples of the most common types of speakers. For instance, my voice is very soft and low and I feel like I'm yelling even though I'm not. I like the fact that the book gives exercises to the reader to help them with their issue of how they say things. Although, my voice or the way I say things may not relate to some of the examples in the book, it's was good for me to go through those exercises.